Hi and Lois, 12/5/10
It’s pretty common to see a Sunday strip where the throwaway panels ruin the rhythm of the storytelling; still, I’d like to think that what we see today is unspooling exactly as it happens. Hi just decides to ignore Lois’s initial suggestion to dine al fresco in the freezing cold, and remains deliberately obtuse even as she puts their icy picnic BBQ together. “Wait, she can’t really mean that, can she? Like, we’re eating outside? Outside outside?” Lois can endure any weather! She’s got her pink headband of warmth and safety to protect her!
Panel from Mary Worth, 12/5/10
Ah, yes, Jill isn’t just opposed to Adrian and Scott getting married; she is adamantly opposed to the very concept of marriage. Sacred union, feh! It would be vaguely daring if Jill were supposed to be some kind of radical who angrily rejects marriage as an institution, but I’m guessing in fact she just needs to learn How To Love, and Mary will be the one who teaches her. Didn’t we just have this storyline, where Dr. Mike couldn’t love until he made peace with his dying drunk vigilante dad? Yes, we did, and it was awesome, so hush your mouth and let this thing play out.
Panel from Judge Parker, 12/5/10
BREAKING: SMUG RICH ASSHOLES FROM JUDGE PARKER STILL RICH, SMUG
This entry was posted on Sunday, December 5, 2010 at 10:19 am and is filed under Hi and Lois, Judge Parker, Mary Worth. | 105 responses to “” mgmDecember 5th, 2010 at 10:28 am [Reply]
It’s nice to have your own winery, but nowhere near as good as your very own meth lab.
Jim NorthDecember 5th, 2010 at 10:29 am [Reply]
“Winery” or “crude oil pump”?
Nice to have either way, I suppose, but I’d try and lay off pounding down shots of petroleum.
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoDecember 5th, 2010 at 10:33 am [Reply]
*sigh*
post-jumped.
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoDecember 5th, 2010 at 10:35 am [Reply]
ooo, nice callback in the JP throwaway panels! Trudi from Napa, indeed! (the Freep did indeed throw away those panels, so nice of Josh to send me looking for them online!)
Baka GaijinDecember 5th, 2010 at 10:45 am [Reply]
Slylock Fox Mystery: Of course Slylock doubts Weirdly’s alibi. The Fox knows that Reeky Rat purloined the phone call. It’s always Reeky Rat.
Pluggers: Pluggerdogman, Internet Rule 34 belongs on the Internet, not on the motorway.
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoDecember 5th, 2010 at 10:56 am [Reply]
for True Fable.
Scooby-related fail and yet win.
when you see it you will rofl. (also, mmmmmm, bacon!)
mmmm, rainbows.
FENNEC!
MORTAL KOMBAT!! [*]
Hobbe’s Xmas card.
Pseudo3DDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:18 am [Reply]
JP: Actually, making your own wine doesn’t necessarily have to involve you being rich and smug
MW: Jill seems to have sobered up rather quickly.
RustyDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:20 am [Reply]
H&L: Lois hands Hi a plate full of raw burgers already on buns. No wonder he thinks she’s lost it.
zenveloDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:29 am [Reply]
So there is a toast at the rehearsal, but the bride and groom aren’t there? did Mary send them to have a pre-wedding shag?
zenveloDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:31 am [Reply]
@Pseudo3D (#7): Jill just looks sobered up because the caffeine from the Four Lokos just kicked in.
wossnameDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:35 am [Reply]
BrS – I forgot to look at Brenda before commenting earlier – thanks to several mudges for the nudges in that direction, because it’s awesome: giving the good lines to the giant horse (a nod to MT?), nice job of working the exposition into the soap operatic drama, and the extremely dramatic final panel! The only thing I’d subtract points for is using the same art in the throwaway and nonthrowaway panels. Also – ever since Graftovich appeared I’ve been thinking he looks like some real politician. Newt Gingrich maybe?
TheDivaDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:42 am [Reply]
C’shaft: Look, Batiuk, if you’re going to waste five panels of a Sunday strip as the set-up for a lousy pun, at least take a page from Stephen Pastis’ notebook and make the set-up interesting.
DT: The fiend! He’s going to make the morning fog hang around until nine at the very least!
FW: In Funkytown, the only possible way to obtain even a small amount of happiness is through the suffering of another soul. Here we see that principle played out on a global scale.
Marvin: I admit it–I smiled a little, mainly at the memory of my own Divaling being “tackled” by my aunt’s pug on Thanksgiving. Now that Marvin has given me a positive feeling, albeit in a roundabout way, there’s nothing left for me to do but sit back quietly and wait for the Apocalypse to happen.
MW: That’s not Jill–it’s Ann Coulter, who picked up on the parallel Dr. Jeff was trying to draw between Adrian and Scott and his own relationship with Scott’s father, and is now refusing to toast what she sees as blatant gay marriage propaganda.
PBS: See? It may be convoluted, but at least it’s not five panels of Crankshaft singing.
SM: Yeah, a parachute! That’s much more practical and safe than, say, the innate ability to crawl along a vertical surface.
agonyDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:43 am [Reply]
I know H&L are making a (wimpy, effete) joke here, but, really, we have winter barbecues all the time, and I live in on the Canadian prairies, where winter really is winter. Go out to the park or campground, scoop most of the snow off the firepit, roast weenies, drink hot cider, the kids toboggan, or skate or just slide around on the frozen lake, maybe there are a few snowmobiles…. it’s fun.
OregonianDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:44 am [Reply]
Misogamy!! Misogamy on the pages of our very own Sunday papers! Great Scott, I may faint (from joy).
TheDivaDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:45 am [Reply]
@zenvelo (#9): From the looks of things, Adrian and Scott were consumed by a heart-shaped supernova. Dr. Jeff, trouper that he is, continues to give his speech to their ghostly afterimages.
LorneDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:46 am [Reply]
Lois does not do a single thing in today’s strip that is inconsistent with initiating a ritualistic mass suicide.
My only doubt is whether this is economic collapse suicide or doomsday cult suicide. On the one hand, she is a real estate agent; on the other hand, she’s wearing creepy white vestments and an eerie sense of beatitude.
I guess there’s no reason she can’t be a failed real estate agent AND a member of a doomsday cult.
December 5th, 2010 at 11:49 am [Reply]
I got all four Frame Games today. GO ME!!! :-)
LorneDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:50 am [Reply]
@TheDiva (#12): I was wondering if Jill was supposed to be Ann Coulter too. I thought her hatred of gay marriage would have burned so intensively through her inherent self-loathing that it came out the other side as loathing of marriage itself (for choosing to be gay).
NoahSnarkDecember 5th, 2010 at 11:54 am [Reply]
Hi & Lois: Barbecue or thinly veiled attempt to thin the brood through pneumonia? That’s for a judge to decide.
Baka GaijinDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:06 pm [Reply]
@Pseudo3D (#7) on Mary Worth: Anyone normal person would sober up quicklike when threatened with salmon squares with a heaping helping of droning platitude.
RustyDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:09 pm [Reply]
@Lorne (#18): I always assumed Ann Coulter was gay. This is not a political comment, just an observation.
PatrickDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:17 pm [Reply]
For people whose favorite restaurant is the Bum Boat, having a butler at your rehearsal dinner seems like overkill.
langostinoDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:23 pm [Reply]
Jill won’t drink to that, but she won’t let it keep her from drinking.
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:30 pm [Reply]
sad news for Baka Gaijin.
(Not really a) Time TravellerDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:38 pm [Reply]
Huh, so burgers go on the buns THEN on the barbecue. I’m sure the raw meat juice adds some great flavour.
Mmm Salmonella
Baka GaijinDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:47 pm [Reply]
@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#24): That’s one country I’m not visiting for a while. I may even stay away from the, heh heh, hairstyle for a while just for safety.
@(Not really a) Time Traveller (#25): When you care enough to give the very best, give Salmonella.
bats :[December 5th, 2010 at 12:52 pm [Reply]
@Mr. O’Malley (#92Y): *wild little cute raccoon hand applaz!*
John C FremontDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:57 pm [Reply]
DT (last panel) – “Hi, my name is Diesel 10. You may remember me from such films as Calling All Engines! and Thomas and the Magic Railroad.”
You don’t think Ol’ Muley’s teched, do you boys and girls?
HibbletonDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:59 pm [Reply]
SlyFx: Hey! No fair. All of his answers start with W.
MarkTwailDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:03 pm [Reply]
JP: And can back up their smugness by writing a “best seller” in two weeks on a beach? Every comic strip writer’s fantasy. Okay, everyone’s fantasy.
MWDGDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:10 pm [Reply]
MW: First of all let me say how wonderful it is that Connie Stevens is sitting front row at Jeff’s toast.
Jeff seems to have finally come out of the closet with this toast. He looks as sassy and sissy as Liza Minelli fan in a rickshaw.
The complete idiocy of a waiter in tails with a covered dish at what appears to be an Applebee’s made my day.
ChipDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:14 pm [Reply]
Is it just me or were today’s comics so verbose as to make me skip half of them? Blondie had more words than my college thesis! I read ALL the way through Sally Forth to read about Frosty having a “Break Down” in the airport?! Hello? He’s a SNOWMAN! He should have had a MELTDOWN!
And in Mary Worth- we’ve finally found the thing that will make Jill STOP drinking: a toast to the happy couple!
ChipDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:18 pm [Reply]
Judge Parker: Hey- Sam is a LAWYER! When the hell is he going to sue Judge Parker for writing about his exploits and not sharing the wealth?
I can’t wait for the Judge to write about his upcoming trip with the smoking hot home-wrecker: “Dear Penthouse, I never thought I’d actually be writing one of these letters…”
DiggerDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:28 pm [Reply]
MW: Hey, Jill, if you won’t drink to that, would you be willing to throw your glass at Dr. Jeff’s head to get him to shut the hell up? Thanks.
bats :[December 5th, 2010 at 1:28 pm [Reply]
Next Sunday: “Come and see the violence inherent in the system!”
John C FremontDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:31 pm [Reply]
MW – Why is the front of that restaurant staring at me? Could that be Delicious Pursuits? I hear they make a mean sandwich there.
Buck RipsnortDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:36 pm [Reply]
BB: Dear nurse: If a man comes in w/ an arrow visibly sticking out of his ass, don’t ask him where it hurts, ask how it happened; bound to be a story in it.
Ink Pen: Actually a better future glimpse of the FC kids than PBS! Congratulations!
ElkMeadowDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:43 pm [Reply]
@wossname (#y97):
PV – That “strange evidence” is clearly a carving of initials: “P+I” Weren’t you ever in high school, Galahad?
*Looks again* You’re right, that’s exactly what the crazy lady did, putting it on a wall where her would-be rescuers would find it and follow her to yank both back to so-called civilization, while Mordred’s second daughter tosses first daughter and baby out and makes Draco the head snob, sans Harry…oh, wait, that’s what Ig is, only it’s spelled “hairy.” And Prudence has brown hair, and Arn has red. **headdesk** It’s about the same as B.D./Boopsie/Zonker = Brad/Toni/T.J. that was mentioned a couple of days ago.
ElkMeadowDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:46 pm [Reply]
@Buck Ripsnort (#37):
Ink Pen is great today!
Joe BlevinsDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:46 pm [Reply]
JP: Aw, come on. Please don’t use the phrase “I have to admit…” unless you are actually confessing to something shameful, such as “I have to admit, I mauled a family of campers back in ‘79″ or “I have to admit, I steal salt and ketchup packets from the McDonald’s down the street.”
MW: I dig that Mary Worth is doing a parody of the Last Supper, but casting Jeff as Jesus and Mary as Judas seems a bit overly dramatic. After all, Judas betrayed Jesus with a kiss, which is much more physical contact than Mary would find comfortable. Oh, sure, Mary will eventually betray Jeff (possibly by cheating at cribbage or drinking all his Ensure), but she’ll do it with a nice, firm handshake, thank you very much.
commodorejohnDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:49 pm [Reply]
On a non-comic-related note, I’ve been listening through the 2008 remasters of the classic Genesis albums, and I just have to say: holy shit. THIS is what new mixes are supposed to be. It’s even succeeded in making “The Battle Of Epping Forest” not a complete waste of space, and I didn’t think that was possible; the stuff that was good to begin with is downright jaw-dropping. [*]
A3G – “Thus the potted plant” is a phrase I fully intend to start working into casual conversation. Also, uh, either Mr. Brooks is just as crazy as Iris, or something very different than what the art depicted happened on that streetcorner.
BB – Mrs. Halftrack finally snaps. She needs work on the “actually succeeding in killing anybody” department, but as her modus operandi seems to be “keep firing until you run out of ammunition,” I have high hopes for this.
BrS – Oh man, he’s using a BOOM! gun against his own son? That’s cold.
Buckles – It’s not Calvin & Hobbes, but I’ll take it.
Crankshaft – I’m sure this is some lame malapropism/sub-pun if you know the song being Crankshaftized (my guess is on “shovel,”) but I severely doubt it would be worth the effort to look it up. I mean, even less so than the usual Crankshaft fare.
Curtis – Ha ha! Now Curtis will get face cancer, from the radium! Please extend a hand for guest author Tom Batiuk!
FC – Eleven full images of wanton Keane-on-Keane violence? It is Christmas!
FG – Not that I don’t enjoy looking at Dale Arden in what could best be described as a sleeveless belly chiton, but maybe if the top third of each Flash Gordon installment weren’t taken up by character portraits, the plot could move a little faster. Or at least it could go the Prince Valiant route and have the same number of panels but larger. Also, today’s strip attempts to break with the strong Aliens vibe of the storyline by asking “what if Ripley could bargain with the alien queen?” [*]
FoxTrot – Wait, is goComics feeding me a Spanish translation of FoxTrot, or is that the actual strip? I mean, I’d expect there to be a meta-joke in the dialogue if that were the case, but as far as my rusty two semesters of Spanish can determine, it’s a pretty standard FoxTrot joke.
FW – Frankly, I’m surprised that Funky Winkerbean hasn’t done more strips about the various predicted climate-change apocalypses. I guess they’re just not Lisa-centric enough.
JP – Yay, Trudi gets a reference! Now if we could just find out what’s become of Busty Rusty Duncan…anyway, why is Abbey’s hair pink? Was she auditioning for a role in an anime? Well, can’t argue with that…
Luann – “Well, I might remember them better if I actually liked any of you.”
MT – Continuity within Mark Trail Sundays!? This promises so many kinds of awesome!
MW – Okay, so I know we joked about this a lot back in the original Scott/Adrian storyline, but is it me, or does Jeff actually seem to be implying that he and Scott’s dad were married, or at least close enough for that “full circle” line to make any sense? He’s certainly got that dreamy expression again…
Phantom – Giant detailed panels and some downright funny banter. This is why I like The Phantom.
PV – Hooo! Time for more of Dear Prudence! (And Ig, hopefully!)
RMMD – Eee, June is kind of alarming today. “Have some wine! Down with democracy! Watch as I stare Rex out of existence! PATRICK NAGEL BEAM!!!”
SFx – Slylock can tell that the telephone was not invented by Thomas Edison because it would actually have been one of Edison’s engineers idea slaves.
ElkMeadowDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:52 pm [Reply]
@agony (#13):
We had winter barbeques when I was a kid, out at the lake while we were ice fishing and skating. And here in Eastern Oregon, it’s not unheard of to dust scrape melt the snow off the barbeque and grill up the steaks and salmon, but when it’s in your own back yard, you eat inside the house. And hamburgers aren’t worth the time and effort.
@(Not really a) Time Traveller (#25):
Someone here (not me) suggested that the family toasts the blood-soaked buns. Or that the meat is frozen. Either way, it’s still dumb.
bourbon babe, unbuckledDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:59 pm [Reply]
(Just dropping in between essays….)
MW: Why can’t those damned people stand still? They’re making me feel as woozy as Jill at a wedding-rehearsal party. Maybe Jeff has been blathering on for so long that the guests have decided to tag-team their polite attention to him.
JP: Whoa, kids, you’d better lay off on that homemade wine, squeezed from the inky blackness of the despairing souls who labor for your pleasure—Abbey’s hair is turning all pink, and Sam believes that a book that hasn’t even been published has sold millions of copies.
BraniffDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:04 pm [Reply]
FC: Bil Keane’s lame attempt to get into the greeting card business dominated by such powerhouses as the Peanuts and Garfield franchises. Sorry, Bil, but Hallmuck (er Hallmark) thought your saccharine family was too sweet for their tastes.
True FableDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:07 pm [Reply]
@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#6): GOAT!!!! Family with goat Photo!!
Sam Driver’s Pretty People Posse! Sam’s assuming the book the Judge just wrote about Theresa Delgado will be a best-seller. Is it because it is starring a thinly veiled avatar of Sam, the World’s Sexiest, Richest, Least Work-Laden Lawyer/Private Eye, or because of the slash fiction the Judge used to wrap up the story line? Or does Sam not even know which book they will be pushing? It doesn’t matter. Sam’s drinking problem makes him believe Abbey has pink hair, so it’s all good.
CalicoDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:13 pm [Reply]
@commodorejohn (#41):
Wow, Commodore – is it the huge box set they put out in ‘08?
I agree, “Battle” is probably the weakest spot on SEBTP, but still fun – I love the image of Harold Demure (maybe Les Moore in drag) climbing up a tree during the gang skirmish.
Foxtrot is a pure classic. Love it.
Funny, as I”ve been watching the BBC doco “Phil Collins-A Life less Ordinary” on YT today in between housecleaning.
December 5th, 2010 at 2:14 pm [Reply]
Oh, and the Keane Kids are heathens.
CalicoDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:18 pm [Reply]
MW – “His late Father was my lover-*hic* I mean, we were like brothers in High School! *hic*!”
Black DrazonDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:20 pm [Reply]
JP: COLORING GNOMES STILL UNDERPAID, COLOR BLIND AND SERVING TAR IN CRYSTAL GLASSES. Masses remain entertained.
commodorejohnDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:25 pm [Reply]
@Calico (#46): Yeah, I think so. It’s just amazing – there’s parts in “Supper’s Ready” and all over Lamb that I never even heard before that just jump out now. And “Battle” still isn’t anywhere near the best part of Selling England, but it’s actually interesting to listen to now, and that’s a huge improvement from how it sounded to me before.
bunivasalDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:38 pm [Reply]
I found some hilarious Bill Watterson art online and there was some that I thought was pretty awesome.
http://ignatz.brinkster.net/cbillart.html
mr 12 oz canDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:41 pm [Reply]
mary worth- dr jeff changes 10 years in featues every other panal and the dinner there must really suck because hes not wearing his dining out green jacket. wow closer then brothers back in high school . makes you wonder how the guy didnt know he was dead and had a son to the daughter dragged him home after some park bench sex to meet him .
agonyDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:42 pm [Reply]
@commodorejohn (#41): Hmmm, Genesis….
I probably won’t bother with the remasters, but you’ve inspired me to at least go downstairs and dig out my originals. Snap crackle pop, it’s vinyl…
commodorejohnDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:52 pm [Reply]
@agony (#53): I’d at least go hear them somewhere, if I were you. (No argument about the LPs though – there’s nothing quite like having 144 in² of good album cover!)
Peanut GalleryDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:01 pm [Reply]
Slylock Fox – Maybe I’m overthinking this, but “I spent the entire evening in my time machine” doesn’t sound like a solid alibi under any circumstances.
True FableDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:11 pm [Reply]
Children of the Circle Jeffy putting his foot up PJ’s arse all during the month of April will hover before my eyes like an apparition of doom warning, “these people might very well next right next door, or the next block, or…. Jeffy might be coming for you next.” Family Circus keeps me up nights.
TheDivaDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:12 pm [Reply]
@commodorejohn (#41): re: Crankshaft: The phrase Cranky is searching for is “shuffle off to Buffalo,” which I only know because it’s also the name of a tap-dancing step I learned lo these many years ago.
In G.I. Joe, knowing is half the battle. In Crankshaft, it’s just being annoyed with the “joke” in a different way.
Pseudo3DDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:18 pm [Reply]
FC – It’s days like this that make me wonder if FC wouldn’t be better as a condom commercial.
hibbletonDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:35 pm [Reply]
@Buck Ripsnort (#37):
If you’re a soldier in camp swampy, having an arrow sticking out of your ass is the least of your problems and probably not that unusual.
commodorejohnDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:08 pm [Reply]
@Shawn S. (#60): Only if it’s the start of a series wherein every single Luann character undergoes the same treatment.
PoteetDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:26 pm [Reply]
DT — Camelot? Camelot?? Camelot was a dreamscape compared to the hideous Tracyverse, even after Mordred took over.
This GuyDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:27 pm [Reply]
H&L: What Lois is describing is a “cookout.” I maintain that you can’t legitimately have “a barbecue” unless you actually cook and eat barbecue.
PoteetDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:31 pm [Reply]
GA — There goes my desire for a snack.
Vince MDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:34 pm [Reply]
@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#6): Oh, that #3 is so wrong, yet…so tasty. Save me a Wise Man!
TrilobiteDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:41 pm [Reply]
I applaud Jill’s decision to stop drinking, but “I will never drink to celebrate the institution of marriage” is a rather flimsy strategy to fight off her alcoholism. Or at least it would be in real life; thank god this is Mary Worth, where going through a rehearsal dinner, a wedding, a reception, and a week of smug basking by Mary over what a great wedding it was will keep Jill off the sauce long enough to collect a 6-month chip.
CalicoDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:45 pm [Reply]
@agony (#53):
Love dat vinyl, still!
Haha, I actually have a vinyl copy of “Ark II” from 1969!
Guide me, Mark Trail! : )
December 5th, 2010 at 4:46 pm [Reply]
Of course Jill won’t drink to marriage. It takes a lot of hard work to put a wedding together! You have to get a person and place to perform the ceremony, caterers, florists, an expensive dress, a huge cake, and that’s just too much for one drink!
No, Jill would rather drink to something easier and much more common, like breathing.
CalicoDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:47 pm [Reply]
@True Fable (#56):
This reminded me of whats-his-name kicking Lucky/Bucky the baby deer recently.
Happy Holidays, dear cartoonists!
December 5th, 2010 at 4:54 pm [Reply]
@Shawn S. (#62): there are other answers to children then abuse.
that’s all I’m gonna say about that.
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:54 pm [Reply]
@Vince M (#67): yeah, took me a couple of looks to figure out what was up with that pic, but once I did, I was ROFL’n.
CanuckDownSouthDecember 5th, 2010 at 5:07 pm [Reply]
So H&J uses fruit to illustrate “judging not by the colour of their skin” … specifically with a banana … the *easiest* fruit to gauge over/under/just ripe by the colour of the peel. I think I understand why they almost never stray from generics.
mojoDecember 5th, 2010 at 5:09 pm [Reply]
So what exactly is up Jill’s butt, anyway? Usually with these soaps it’s painfully obvious within two seconds of the character’s entrance, but I just don’t get her. At first I thought she was just kinda snarky, and perhaps a loving homage to the folks on this blog. But she’s just gotten meaner and meaner. She’s against the marriage and wants to break them up, but it’s not like she wants Scott for herself. I’m guessing she’s too smart to actually want Adrian (let alone the spectre of an actual (gasp!) lesbian relationship in Mary Worth! Mary, forgive me for even SUGGESTING such a thing! I hang my head in abject shame). If she hates marriage as an institooshun so much, then why the hell does she volunteer for wedding planning stuff?
Jill would be a lot more fun if there was a POINT to all this hatred. But she’s just been randomly hating things. It’s like she has a plastic Magic Hate Ball in her purse, and every now and then she shakes it to divine what she should do. “Oh, Magic Hate Ball, they’re serving a tray of baloney slices rolled up with toothpicks at the rehearsal dinner! What should I do?” And then the triangle showed up like magic in the blue liquid: “Get Drunk”.
carbunicleDecember 5th, 2010 at 5:10 pm [Reply]
Hot food outside in the winter in support of winter sports is qualitatively different from eating outside in the winter because you are pretending it’s summer. One is vital and good, the other is pathetic.
greghousesgfDecember 5th, 2010 at 5:22 pm [Reply]
what confuses me is Hi’s response of “whose?” does Lois routinely do cookouts for other people who aren’t there?
AlisonDecember 5th, 2010 at 5:36 pm [Reply]
Jill should totally hook up with the “Judge Parker” panel guy. Having a private winery sounds like her dream come true!
Uncle LumpyDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:09 pm [Reply]
Gotta love Doc Jeff struttin’ all Tom Wolfe there — shot knees, boozy stumbling all forgotten in his transport of bliss at all the derivative attention. Enjoy it pal; you’re driving Mary home.
agonyDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:11 pm [Reply]
@commodorejohn (#41):
OK, I’ve just listened to the remastered version of Supper’s Ready on youtube – nicely synched to the video of an old live performance – and I think I’m going to go lie down now.
El FakirDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:14 pm [Reply]
Dilbert – Has anyone else noticed that the Sunday strips have been consistently funny even when Scott seemed to run out of ideas during the week (not necessarily this week)?
Pseudo3DDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:21 pm [Reply]
I don’t think Jill is secretly pining for Adrian, otherwise, she wouldn’t have taken offense at the “marriage is a sacred union of two souls” comment…after all, it was gender neutral.
I have a feeling that our nagging questions such as why is Jill a wedding planner in the first place, why Jill had that dance scene with Jeff, and why Adrian cares so much for Jill, will never really be answered.
KarMannDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:24 pm [Reply]
Luann: Oh dear lord, when I was re-reading Luann in the local dead-tree version, it occurred to me to wonder why Nancy remembers that couple so well. And then I realized: wife-swapping. It’s the only explanation, really, isn’t it? And it explains where Luann’s blond hair comes from, too. [*] And yes, the strip seems to imply that both kids where with them, but they could have found out about both pairs of children being the same age if they’d kept in touch, and heard when Mrs. Texan gave birth to Frank’s child nine months after their Hawaiian vacation, around the same time as Luann was born.
The RidgerDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:30 pm [Reply]
Jill was in medical school with Adrian – they were BFF and the only reason Adrian got through the first year was the support Jill offered her – and possibly some cheating on exams. But then Jill was swept off her feet and married by an old-fashioned guy who didn’t want his wife working, so she never graduated… and then he lost all his money in the stock market crash and dumped her to marry a wealthy South African diamond heiress. So now Jill is bitter about everything, and she does wedding planning to sabotage the institution she blames for her misery, by encouraging bridezillas. Adrian feels guilty because she encouraged Jill to get married, which is why she got Jill her menial job at the hospital, but she actually thinks Jill likes her still…
PoteetDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:34 pm [Reply]
After seeing the Monday SHERMAN’S LAGOON, I am once again grateful that SL sometimes deals with actual current ecological issues with humor and insight, thus freeing the daily MT strips to do whatever the hell it is that they are doing.
daleDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:35 pm [Reply]
If you’re seeing the same ModCloth ad that I am, can you not think of Andersonville? Buy the girl a meal or at least lend her a sweater.
Alfred E. NeumanDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:36 pm [Reply]
@Mr. O’Malley (Y#92): Amazing…Bravo!
PoteetDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:36 pm [Reply]
@Pseudo3D (#82): PSSST! Ixnay on the aggingnay estionsquay! I sense a possible flashback ahead, and we mustn’t encourage it!
AustriaDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:44 pm [Reply]
@bunivasal (#51): Cue college cartoonist looking at Bill Watterson’s college cartoons.
Cue college cartoonist feeling hopelessly inadequate.
Cue college cartoonist lying in a corner in the fetal position.
BGSS: Random observation. I don’t know why I’m just saying this NOW, but I always thought Snuffy and Loweezy looked way too old to have two kids below the age of 10, one of them being a BABY, yet. It’s…more than a little unnerving.
Blondie: As soon as I saw the word “iPad,” I stopped reading. Screw you, Elmo.
Curtis: Seventh panel. Holy $#!^, the subtext. I can’t even…
FC: YESSSSSSS MELONHEAD VIOLENCE AHAHAHAHAHAHA
Best Family Circus in a long time? I think so.
HtH: …he boasts, as he sits on a stool doing absolutely nothing.
H&L: I started to suspect something the day she yoinked all her kids’ halloween candy away from them, just to throw it away. My suspicions grew with the Job Jar and her belief that libraries are driving bookstores out of business. This strip confirms it. Lois is certifiably insane.
MW: JILL’S A LESBIAN JILL’S A LESBIAN JILL’S A LESBIAN
I’m calling it.
PBS: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
SF: I didn’t even think anyone nowadays was AWARE of Mr. Magoo’s Christmas Carol. My dad makes us watch it every year, that’s the only reason I know about it. Ghost of Christmas Past is pretty freaking awesome.
Dr. WeirdDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:49 pm [Reply]
FC
One can credit or be afraid of the year of Keane carnage, but I have to say I like the strip for showing the kids as worked up and energetic for once All too often we see them with droopy, half-lidded eyes, as if they’ve been tranked.
demoncatDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:51 pm [Reply]
jill look of defieance and saying i will not drink to this means she has something planned for the nups which will end with scot and adrien still married and Jill consumed in the fires of Mary worth power.
bourbon babe, unbuckledDecember 5th, 2010 at 6:54 pm [Reply]
@The Ridger (#81): That is …. just way more interesting and well plotted than anything we’re actually going to see in this storyline.
bats :[December 5th, 2010 at 7:25 pm [Reply]
@Poteet (#82): it’s all about the horns!
(and antlers)
December 5th, 2010 at 7:33 pm [Reply]
FC: Yeah, we usually see a variation of this every year, January through November, the kids are little bastards, in December, they’re total angels, we get it…BUT…I could totally do without November where Billy is pulling Dolly’s pigtail. I know some ladies who like that, and in a good way.
tb4000December 5th, 2010 at 7:34 pm [Reply]
MW: Settle down, Jill baby….you don’t need a man to be happy. Though happiness in this strip only takes the form of smug satisfaction provided to Mary McMeddleson when she foists her personal morals on everyone else, so you were never going to be happy anyway.
terrapinDecember 5th, 2010 at 7:42 pm [Reply]
MW-No, Jill won’t drink to that. Now that her eyes have cleared a little and she’s gotten a good look at what she made a drunken pass at, she won’t be drinking anything stronger than diet cola.
Steve the PocketDecember 5th, 2010 at 7:47 pm [Reply]
I went over to the Love Is site to see what a commenter a couple pages back was talking about, and noticed Saturday’s strip. Or more accurately, what was under it. The only thing more amusing than a comic that lets visitors leave permanent comments on every strip’s page is one that lets them post their own tags.
Between Friends: All this space on Sundays and this is what you use it for? I feel like we ought to be lobbying for some kind of Bill Watterson Act that makes such flagrant waste of Sunday space illegal. And the penalty would be solitary confinement in a humongous empty white room. Say what you want about Cathy; it made good use of its space.
Blondie: The original strip was going to be about the far more realistic consequence of kids having Internet access — learning the truth of Santa’s nonexistence by the time they’re Elmo’s age — but the syndicate made them change it. Don’t wanna piss off those advertisers!
Edison Lee admittedly has the right idea.
Funky Winkerbean manages to be less depressing when it’s talking about real impending doom than the entire past week’s series about its new main character being phenomenally successful.
Shoe: A question about sound in a vacuum is “sort of” math but only “borders on physics”? This kid would give Zipper with his “The Civil War? Wasn’t that like forty years ago?” a run for his money in the clueless department.
Snuffy Smith: “But iff’n ya find Osama bin Laden in one of ‘em, leave him be. You ‘member what happened to the Circus fam’bly the last time ‘e got forced out of ‘is home!!! ¦P”
EarthgirlDecember 5th, 2010 at 8:22 pm [Reply]
@The Ridger (#81): That’s probably way more interesting and sensible than what the actual reason will be. Perhaps it is time for another pool?
wossnameDecember 5th, 2010 at 8:32 pm [Reply]
@The Ridger (#81): Yes, yes, I think you’re definitely on the right track — the unhappy marriage that she feels ruined her life. And Pseudo3D @ 79, I think we will, at least in some half-assed way, find out what’s wrong with Jill — because otherwise Mary will have done nothing in this arc, other than stand around while Jill insulted Adrian’s choices. I just can’t believe it’s taken this long for full-bore meddling to begin. And Poteet, you’re probably right about the ashbackflay.
AnonymousDecember 5th, 2010 at 8:35 pm [Reply]
That must be some winery that makes a red chardonnay…
I am Jack's usernameDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:02 pm [Reply]
“I won’t drink to that… and yet, my glass! It draws ever nearer to my mouth! Oh no!, it’s going in…” *gulp gulp gulp* Time to get my freak on, she thinks, and sort out this square hetero-normative motherfuckers! “Oh, WHY didn’t Daddy love me?!”
I am Jack's usernameDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:03 pm [Reply]
Oh gosh darn, typos and orthographic errors. No more stoned forum posting for me.
PoteetDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:04 pm [Reply]
@bunivasal (#51): WOW. Thank you.
Helen ClarkDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:05 pm [Reply]
Jesus H. Christ. Is there anything worse than some nincompoop who gets the ((hic)) floor and decides to hold forth on love and life and family until you just about want to grab your shotgun and put everyone out of their misery with one good shot to his orange Grecian-Formula head?
Who is this ((hic)) bozo, anyway? Father of the bride, you say? Why didn’t someone buy him enough celebratory cocktails before now to keep him quietly bemoaning the loss of his little girl, huh? Cripes, does Helen have to think of ((hic)) everything? Where’s that goddamned bartender?
That Library NutDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:07 pm [Reply]
Today’s throwaway panel on Beetle Bailey COMPLETELY changes the story! The General looks ahead with dead eyes, probably being psychologically tortured and manipulated by some mysterious government agency to go on a suicide mission. He leaves his wife, stumbling away a zombie, ignoring her rampant goring of innocent civilians, to head to a secret base to pilot a plane and launch missiles at various world capitols, leaving this picturesque 1950’s America as the highest power, all the while muttering “I’M PLAYING GOLF.” To add insult to injury, they have dressed him in an outfit that even makes color-blind people cringe.
Black DrazonDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:23 pm [Reply]
MW: “…but I WILL drink for unrelated reasons! *gulp* Barkeep, get me a whiskey!”
FOOBed againDecember 5th, 2010 at 10:12 pm [Reply]
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