The Jumble, 12/4/10
Never mind the scrambled word game that I am as usual too dumb to even attempt to solve; I just spent some time squinting at the Bieber-coiffed kid on the left, trying to figure out what exactly it says on his shirt. “Butter”? “Glitter”? “Grifters”? “GBusters”? Let’s go with “GBusters.” It’s the hip new street slang for “Ghostbusters,” which is a movie that all the young kids are talking about these days.
Archie, 12/4/10
In panel three, we can see that by “social networking” Dilton means “Craigslist casual furry encounters.”
This entry was posted on Saturday, December 4, 2010 at 06:25 pm and is filed under Archie, Jumble. | 107 responses to “” MibbitmakerDecember 4th, 2010 at 6:29 pm [Reply]
Goddammit!
Please read my #Y113 and #Y116! Thank you.
(I never expect posts on Saturday)
ArkhamDecember 4th, 2010 at 6:32 pm [Reply]
I feel kind of terrible for Dilton. The Riverdale High mascot is seeming more and more like some kind of serial killer/rapist with every subsequent appearance. This strip feels destined to become that scene in every horror movie, where one character insists on being alone and will only be seen again in the third act as a wreath made from intestines.
bunivasalDecember 4th, 2010 at 6:34 pm [Reply]
Actually, I think Dilton is gassing that poor mascot weirdo. Look at the fear in his saucer-sized eyes as he desperately pounds on the glass.
MibbitmakerDecember 4th, 2010 at 6:35 pm [Reply]
Hey, my #113 and #116 made #1! ;o)
Archie: A furry encounter that includes a tracheotomy with eyes??? Now that’s squicky!
BigTedDecember 4th, 2010 at 6:45 pm [Reply]
I always thought Dilton was too nerdy to be part of Archie’s gang. Maybe he realizes that “going to Pop’s” is teen slang for “beat you up in the parking lot.”
zenveloDecember 4th, 2010 at 7:24 pm [Reply]
in that third word in the Jumble “hookers” is misspelled…
zenveloDecember 4th, 2010 at 7:25 pm [Reply]
Funky Winkerbean: Les met a hooker in San Diego named Destiny.
zenveloDecember 4th, 2010 at 7:28 pm [Reply]
Mary Worth has the weirdest weddings. Since when does the groom wait tables at the rehearsal dinner?
DanzigDecember 4th, 2010 at 7:28 pm [Reply]
I want to see Mary Worth go through a TSA patdown. Is that too wierd?
BrentDecember 4th, 2010 at 7:31 pm [Reply]
My solution to the Jumble: HATE “TEDDY”. Because apparently they’re not only history students, they’re also not down with Roosevelt’s progressive ways.
JonnDecember 4th, 2010 at 7:32 pm [Reply]
I am fairly certain Archie’s artists are just trolling now.
Pseudo3DDecember 4th, 2010 at 7:56 pm [Reply]
Great, now Batiuk is sending Les to Houston, having crushed San Diego’s will to live.
Personally, I’d like to see a crossover comic between Funky Winkerbean and Mark Trail.
FACT: We’d all like to punch Les right now.
FACT: Les has facial hair, and plenty of it.
FACT: Mark likes to punch men with facial hair.
Connect the dots!
DeonDecember 4th, 2010 at 8:09 pm [Reply]
Of all the recurring background characters in the Archie strip; mascot who never takes his costume off is starting to creep me out a little.
AmateurDecember 4th, 2010 at 8:11 pm [Reply]
@Danzig (#9): Yes.
PoteetDecember 4th, 2010 at 8:30 pm [Reply]
JUMBLE — It’s obvious from their lascivious expressions that these alleged “history students” are using numbers as code for unspeakable sex acts. I can’t believe that kid on the left said “1939″ in a public place. He ought to get his mouth washed out with soap.
PoteetDecember 4th, 2010 at 8:36 pm [Reply]
ARCHIE — Gaaaaaaah, once again we see a thinly-disguised version of Dogman from THE SHINING, and he’s looking right at me. Back to therapy I go.
AustriaDecember 4th, 2010 at 8:55 pm [Reply]
Luann: Do I want to know.
This…this whole fiasco is interesting to me. People, the things I’ve seen would undoubtedly make some of you feel the need to upchuck. Me being a fangirl and all. And yet…this comparatively tame display of pushing-the-boundaries-of-PG newspaper comic sexuality actually makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable. Amazing.
MT: BAHAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT IS THAT
MW: Jill’s stubborn “No” actually got a laugh out of me. It’s sad when the soap opera strips are the ones that make you laugh.
PBS: Dare I hope…? Has Officer Potus become a recurring character?!
Zits: He says, as she stirs a bowl of pink goo.
Riff ChickDecember 4th, 2010 at 8:58 pm [Reply]
RE: Archie – “In panel three, we can see that by ’social networking’ Dilton means ‘Craigslist casual furry encounters.’”
Masterful.
JDMDecember 4th, 2010 at 9:07 pm [Reply]
Is there any other way to read that Archie strip?
MustangDecember 4th, 2010 at 9:08 pm [Reply]
That dog behind that window has those weird eyes from Shylock Fox in its chest, and so I am about creeped out enough to hang it up and go on and do more normal things with what is left of my life.
Walker of DogDecember 4th, 2010 at 9:26 pm [Reply]
With the basic knowledge gained from a quick trip through the adult reference section, and following a little light roleplaying (as desperate young lovers in a world on the brink of war), the history students did |E|A|C|H| |O|T|H|E|R|.
Alfred E. NeumanDecember 4th, 2010 at 9:31 pm [Reply]
@Austria (#17) Re MW: Same here. For the very first time in my life, I laughed out loud at a Mary Worth strip when I saw Jill’s face in panel 1. Nevertheless, Jill was wise to turn down Mary’s appetizer-size salmon rounds. When they’re combined with mass quantities of alcohol, projectile vomiting is inevitable. Of course, if that happened, I’d be laughing out loud at a Mary Worth strip for the second time in my life.
TristramDecember 4th, 2010 at 9:36 pm [Reply]
I can not figure out that dog.
Naked Bunny with a WhipDecember 4th, 2010 at 9:47 pm [Reply]
“Craigslist casual furry encounters.”
That Dilton is quite an animal, if you don’t mind me saying so. Rar!
tb4000December 4th, 2010 at 9:55 pm [Reply]
Goddamn you Josh, I thought this was the last safe haven on the internet where I would be safe from Justin Bieber-isms, but they found me.
fishmorgjpDecember 4th, 2010 at 10:03 pm [Reply]
I don’t know if that’s a window in the background; it might be a flat-screen TV hooked up to Dil’s laptop.
ChowderDecember 4th, 2010 at 10:12 pm [Reply]
The Archie Joke Generating Laugh Unit 3000 may not quite understand humor, but it’s got awkward stupidity spot on.
Red GreenbackDecember 4th, 2010 at 10:12 pm [Reply]
Archie: So, at the window, there’s a giant dog with a VHS cassette on his collar… hmmm. Apparently the AJGLU 3000 is turning this venerated comic strip into some kinda weird Mark… Tracy hybrid. Oh well, Go Fightin’ Maxelladoodles!
Jumble: [1][3][3][7] [5][P][3][3][K]
carbunicleDecember 4th, 2010 at 10:17 pm [Reply]
@JDM (#19): Not any more.
hibbletonDecember 4th, 2010 at 10:20 pm [Reply]
Dilton can’t join his friends because his spaghetti arms can’t handle the world’s largest laptop. And why is he wearing two monocles in panel two?
NoahSnarkDecember 4th, 2010 at 10:28 pm [Reply]
Adding to the surreal atmosphere, that is when Archie and Veronica learned that Dilton’s ring tone was “How much for that doggy in the window”.
yaoi huntress earthDecember 4th, 2010 at 10:34 pm [Reply]
FW: On the bright side, we all know that eventually Les’ fans will want another book and since he’s already used up his dead wife, he’s got nothing and will be a one-hit wonder.
daleDecember 4th, 2010 at 10:50 pm [Reply]
JUMBLE: G is THE written vertically.
LUANN: Aside from this story is making me sick and afraid to look at it each new day, does massaging a cramp do any good?
I had a minor cramp in my foot this morning. I did not sit down in the parking lot and take my shoe off.
December 4th, 2010 at 10:50 pm [Reply]
@yaoi huntress earth (#32):
It’s Westview. One of the three women who are inexplicably attracted to Les will inevitably come down with liver cancer. And then — ka-ching! — Les is in bidness again.
Filthy AssistantDecember 4th, 2010 at 11:00 pm [Reply]
I’m guessing the jumble is “They ‘Dated’”. I also can never seem to get the actual scrambled words. I think I may be literally retarded when it comes to jumbles.
ChanceDecember 4th, 2010 at 11:05 pm [Reply]
Since Josh has made at least two references to mascots in previous Archie strips, today’s cameo is clearly an attempt to get Josh’s attention. And it worked.
ChanceDecember 4th, 2010 at 11:06 pm [Reply]
@Filthy Assistant (#35): Really? I see the words instantly. Hasty. Tuned. Kosher. The letters are just… there.
KarMannDecember 4th, 2010 at 11:16 pm [Reply]
@Filthy Assistant (#35): You’re right, but it’s not nice to put it in plain text here, without even a spoiler warning. The preferred way to conceal it is to put it in mouseover text, but not everyone’s HTML skills are up to that. [*]
KarMannDecember 4th, 2010 at 11:17 pm [Reply]
@Chance (#37): And that goes double for you, mister! [*]
The RidgerDecember 4th, 2010 at 11:33 pm [Reply]
I do the Jumble every day, and my father and brothers and I email the results to each other. What’s odd is that sometimes we all have the exact same experience with it – be that good or bad, sometimes a word just kicks our butt(s) – but sometimes one or two of us get kicked around while the others find it a breeze. Today’s we all did with little or no trouble…
Pseudo3DDecember 4th, 2010 at 11:43 pm [Reply]
What I found most troubling is the waiter’s expression in the second panel.
He holds shame, but doesn’t want to quite to look down, leaving a stunned yet horribly awkward look in his eyes. Knowing that the woman about to married doesn’t even care for the hors d’oeuvres he has, even if it something tasteless like re-toasted Nilla Wafers, he contemplates his pathetic life.
commodorejohnDecember 4th, 2010 at 11:48 pm [Reply]
@yaoi huntress earth (#32): Well, that’s why he’s got Cayla and Susan on retainer…it’s always good to keep a couple potential tragedies around in case you need something to flesh out later! Of course, if he were really on the ball, he’d check in with Wally, but since the Westview town policy is “forget he even exists because fuck him,” I guess Les doesn’t want to buck the trend. That or he just can’t conceive of anything that doesn’t affect him personally being tragic enough to be worthy of his Serious Writing Genius.
SequiturDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:01 am [Reply]
FW: Les will not be able to survive Houston. There’s too many happy people there.
ElkMeadowDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:01 am [Reply]
I like the idea, mentioned somewhere above, once or twice, of Les being a one-shot wonder; it’s nice that the John Darling book is already on the out-of-print list in the FW universe. Unfortunately, all four women who are waiting for him got the books somehow, somewhere, to prove their devoted fandom.
xpoDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:20 am [Reply]
Today’s Jumble is a coded question in its entirety:
HYATS UDTNE HOKERS DABINT
UDTNE HOKERS DABINT HYATS
You date any hookers that be in the Hyatt’s?
Pseudo3DDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:20 am [Reply]
@Sequitur (#43): Alternatively: Les has a harder job crushing the souls of 2.3 million people. He will succeed, though. Les’s next task is to go to Disney World.
SequiturDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:32 am [Reply]
@Pseudo3D (#46): What? Did Les win the Super Bowl?
Walker of DogDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:39 am [Reply]
@Sequitur (#43): Don’t forget the lax gun laws. We may soon owe a large debt of gratitude to The Air-Conditioning Capital of the World.
@commodorejohn (#42): “Because Fuck ‘Em” would make a nice town motto for Westview, if they ever get tired of “Abandon hope, all ye who enter here”.
commodorejohnDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:47 am [Reply]
I was in a bit of a rush this morning, so here’s some director’s-cut material from my earlier snark. [*]
Looking back at today’s Marmaduke, I think I get it: it’s like Christ’s temptation on the mountain. The nameless sage on the mountain is a standard gag-strip fixture as a dispenser of advice to other characters seeking wisdom, but here he is instead tempted away from the solitude and spiritual contemplation he has sought by promises of earthly pleasure (the Frisbee, obviously.) Naturally, Marmaduke, being a giant hell-beast occasionally shown in the company of demons, is the tempter in the strip. [*]
It strikes me now that that third panel in Funky Winkerbean is what Les looks like after he’s finished getting off to himself. “Exhausting,” indeed.
Olive Oyl’s thought process is “Wimpy and I caused a disastrous flood to strike the town, why aren’t you helping us get the government off our backs?” With an attitude like that, she should be running a nice cutthroat corporation like the United Fruit Company or something.
God, I hate Spider-Man. I used to like him back when he was Tobey Maguire in movies directed by a talented geek icon and written by people who had some basic idea of how to make a character likeable, and back before I had any idea there was such a thing as the Spider-Man newspaper comic. Now I hate him. At least this hasn’t bled over into my perception of the movies.
Rex Morgan’s lines today boil down to “gosh, not doing anything for most of the day and then briefly being driven over to the mayor’s office by my coworker to fail to accomplish my goal there was exhausting!” and he’s still more likeable than Spider-Man. Kind of.
I’m pretty sure Wiley Miller is actually who fringe conservatives are thinking at the end of their “feminist = man-hater = ultra-butch lesbian from a ’70s exploitation film” association chain.
SequiturDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:49 am [Reply]
Les’ next book Death Cat Comes to Texas.
TheTJDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:51 am [Reply]
The AJGLU3000 seems to be stuck on creepy men in animal outfits. Maybe a squirrel got in and started gumming up the works? All I know is that when the gang starts wearing pet outfits, I’m leaving.
commodorejohnDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:54 am [Reply]
@TheTJ (#51): You know, I read once that Internet-infamous furry artist Doug Winger (Do. Not. Google.) did some of the background art for The Angry Beavers, and from then on I was never able to watch that cartoon quite the same way. I wonder if there’s some similar story behind these creepy mascot guys that keep showing up in Archie.
SequiturDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:11 am [Reply]
Sunday
MT: We learn from Mark Trail that animals grow a new set.
I guess that makes Ted Forth an animal. He could make guest appearance in Archie.
Comcis FanDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:12 am [Reply]
Sunday comics:
MW: I like how the restaurant doors in the first panel appear to be screaming.
FW: Cayla and Susan compete for the Mark Twainish science teacher’s attention while Les’ book our metasticizes.
S4th: Brilliant, possibly the sharpest episode of this strip.
Rocky StoneaxeDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:14 am [Reply]
Beetle Bailey — Trick question… Gen. Halftrack never had any balls to begin with!
Crock — Fortunately, the kitty litter is from Garfield’s house, so there are reusable lasagna bits!
Comcis FanDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:14 am [Reply]
Oops. I think the S4th I was commenting on ran Saturday, not Sunday (“Frosty the Businessman”).
Comcis FanDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:18 am [Reply]
@Sequitur (#43):
Good point! Houston sports fans held enormous pep rallies for the Oilers in the 70’s when the team lost in the playoffs, as they (we) were so happy and grateful the team got that far — that close to the Super Bowl. You don’t see that much elsewhere, and it just doesn’t fit with the Funkyverse’s tone of woe, complaint and self-pity.
KarMannDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:22 am [Reply]
@Pseudo3D (#41): I have bad news for you (assuming you’re talking about Saturday’s Mary Worth, right?). That’s not just a waiter. That’s the bridesgroom, Scott.
Which just might make your observation even more spot-on.
SequiturDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:24 am [Reply]
Crock: I’m screaming FOUL! What the hell do they need with kitty litter in a desert full of sand?
Rocky StoneaxeDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:30 am [Reply]
Mary Worth — I’ll take Marvin’s “sweet bippy” and raise you MW’s “I won’t drink to that”! (Are Armstrong and Moy playing “Rowan and Martin: The Card Game”?
bats :[December 5th, 2010 at 1:33 am [Reply]
Wait, what? Is it over? Huh?!?
Fashion PoliceDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:40 am [Reply]
@zenvelo (#8):
Since this is a Charterstone wedding, and Charterstone is governed by a feudal social code, Mr. Hewlett is required to perform menial service because he is a commoner (as shown by his lack of a proper neckte) marrying up, to remind him that even after his marriage he belongs to the servant class.
December 5th, 2010 at 1:40 am [Reply]
A3G — Krazy Kat’s George Herriman is one of the senior partners, so I’m hoping Iris/Ignatz throws a brick at her new beau’s head!
Fashion PoliceDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:45 am [Reply]
We find it disconcerting that Mrs. Morgan’s eyes match her sweater. Are her eyes always that color?
Henry B.December 5th, 2010 at 1:50 am [Reply]
@Danzig (#9):
I want to GIVE Mary Worth a TSA pat down. I’m going to hell, aren’t I?
Rocky StoneaxeDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:53 am [Reply]
Mother Goose & Grimm — Peters’ Pan pun!
Pardon My Planet — Her name is “Onatah”… and she has purple hair!
SequiturDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:54 am [Reply]
@Henry B. (#65): You don’t need to go to hell. Your mind’s in hell already.
A New DayDecember 5th, 2010 at 1:55 am [Reply]
Re: The Jumble, I’m pretty sure the shirt says “Listerine.” And here I didn’t know that Listerine sold branded merchandise – yet another youth-driven trend that’s passed me by!
Rocky StoneaxeDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:01 am [Reply]
@Henry B. (#65): Change “pat down” to “beat down” and I’m in like Flynn!
bats :[December 5th, 2010 at 2:12 am [Reply]
I’m pretty sure the t-shirt is for The Blisters, a teen band from Chicago that formed in 2000 (if Wikipedia is to be believed).
Rocky StoneaxeDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:18 am [Reply]
Crankshaft — Songwriters Al Dubin and Harry Warren must be spinning in their graves!
Snuffy Smith — The Smif/Smith family tree doesn’t fork, so “Hubcap Smif” must be Snuffy’s brother, cousin AND nephew!
SequiturDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:29 am [Reply]
@Rocky Stoneaxe (#71): Crankshaft: Spinnin’? Hell, they’re drillin’ to China!
Rocky StoneaxeDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:35 am [Reply]
Bacchus in the comics:
RMMD — Merlot and/or Cabernet for Rex and June!
Judge Parker — Chardonney for Sam and Abbey!
Mary Worth — Ripple for Jill!
Lesser WharkDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:37 am [Reply]
@yaoi huntress earth (#32):
FW: On the bright side, we all know that eventually Les’ fans will want another book and since he’s already used up his dead wife, he’s got nothing and will be a one-hit wonder.
No problem. The second and third Mrs. Moores are already lining up; all Les needs for future bestseller material is to for each to meet an appropriately tragic demise. For an encore, he’ll have Miss Moore frozen in carbonite and displayed in his living room, to keep her safe from having more fun or being more successful than he ever has.
KarMannDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:38 am [Reply]
Sunday MT: What’s this? Continuity in the Sunday Mark Trails? Is this going to turn into something like The Phantom, where there are two entirely separate & independent storylines, one for Sundays, and one for the rest of the week?
ApemanDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:46 am [Reply]
Starchie: Dilton’s expession in the first two panels appears to be that look one gets when they really don’t want to go somewhere/be with someone because they fear what will happen. Then he turns to his computer and his expression changes a bit, just enough to make it clear that his cyber-fantasy makes him feel safer than he does in his horrible, friendless reality.
Pooch Cafe: (The title of which I don’t mangle, because I actually like it, but…) Poncho isn’t aware what a cat is. I know it’s a “Year One” storyline, but one would figure that dogs’ hatred of cats is a natural, rather than learned, instinct.
Great American SatanDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:58 am [Reply]
I’m so quick to decipher the first four jumbles I sometimes have them all in my head before I finish writing the first into the spots. Other days, bluh. But here is the main thing I like about Jumbles: Unintentional poetry. Sometimes the four words will be strangely evocative. Let’s see what we get today:
Hasty Tuned Koresh Bindat.
Wait, no, Hasty Tuned Kosher Bandit. Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m getting a visual off of that. Kind of like the Hamburglar with a bagel for a head, trying to get his Rickenbacker tuned at the last minute for the Battle of the Bands.
Sorry to have wasted your time.
Rocky StoneaxeDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:00 am [Reply]
Brenda Starr — Brenda throws a ringer!
Dick Tracy — Tracy and the other lawmen use terms like “human debris”, “psycho” and “ghoul” to describe Dr. Mordred… and those are just his GOOD points!
PoteetDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:02 am [Reply]
@bats :[ (#61): Thank you.
Alfred E. NeumanDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:05 am [Reply]
Sunday
A3G— That wacky Iris is a master of the double entendre. What she means, of course, is, “I brought you a piece offering.”
ElkMeadowDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:11 am [Reply]
Prince Valiant: Story arc returns back to Prudence, chasing Ig back to the Underground. And Arn left his post as Person In Charge of wherever that castle is, and, like future Captain James T. Kirk, took two of his men to go chasing after a woman who was leaving of her own free will, as testified by the peasants in the field. Why she would stop to carve her initials in bold letters in the wall is way beyound me. I hope that the underground Labyrinth takes her not to Ig, or to a magic dance, but to the ancestor of Sawney Bean’s section of the cave.
In other words, she is still Toast. And Mordred will be coming around the mountain any week now.
PoteetDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:12 am [Reply]
12/5 — Someone could do an interesting review of how authors fare in comic strips. After reading MT, FW, JP, etc., I wonder why everyone doesn’t want to be a writer.
This GuyDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:21 am [Reply]
@Poteet (#82): Just combining those three, MT tells us that writers barely ever have to waste their time writing, JP tells us that they get huge wodges of cash for their first books, and FW tells us that even if you constantly bitch and moan about being underappreciated and act like a dick to your readers, the public will love you.
dyslexic dogDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:25 am [Reply]
@Sequitur (#59):
I believe part of Crock’s charm is its slavish devotion to the readers’ eager suspension of disbelief.
December 5th, 2010 at 3:28 am [Reply]
@bats :[ (#61):
Never underestimate the power of Scary Gary to make or break a character… just ask the Mole Man! Thanks to a one-shot appearance in the 11-14-08 SG, he’s ascended to Spider-Man stardom!
PoteetDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:38 am [Reply]
@ElkMeadow (#81): Yeah, Prudence. Don’t it always seem to go that you don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone.
PoteetDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:39 am [Reply]
@This Guy (#83): Exactly. It’s a dream job. And sometimes you even have to beat members of the opposite sex off with a stick.
Alfred E. NeumanDecember 5th, 2010 at 3:57 am [Reply]
More Sunday
MT— I’m surprised that Elrod didn’t cite the famous explorer, Captain Jeffrey T. Spaulding, who has said of African elephants, “…we tried to remove the tusks. But they were embedded so firmly we couldn’t budge them. Of course, in Alabama, the Tuscaloosa…”
MW— That’s about the only thing Jill won’t drink to.
Mr. O'MalleyDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:07 am [Reply]
Crankshaft: So few people know the verses to these classic songs. Things like:
With love to lead the way I’ve found more skies of grey than any Russian play could guarantee
We get a little weary of Mr. Einstein’s theory
and so on. Of course Crankshaft has omitted huge pieces of the song.
It’s too bad he didn’t do some of Dubin and Warren’s racier verses:
When she knows as much as we know, she’ll be on her way to Reno
While he still has dough
or
He did right by little Nellie with a shotgun at his … tummy
How could he say no?
JP: Warning! Drinking black chardonnay makes your hair turn purple!
The Lockhorns‘ house seems unusually full of objects.
MW: Jeff’s not much of a public speaker. He completely lost his audience in the third panel. Lucky he had another audience to replace it.
Apparently Jeff’s promotion of first cousin marriages is enough to sober up Jill and put her on the water wagon. And make a dubiously costumed waiter turn up with a comically inadequate serving of food, so the bridegroom doesn’t have to hand around the potato skins any more.
PV: Most people in early Dark Age Britain were illiterate, so taking time to chisel a dedication to Seattle’s late lamented daily paper on the cave wall while tearing away to be with one’s love seems a little hard to swallow.
RMMD: We don’t get to see the wine in this one. Maybe the artist was afraid it would end up colored green when the strip specifically mentions two types of red wine.
@Alfred E. Neuman (#88): He also said: “We took some pictures of the native girls, but they weren’t developed. But we’re going back in a couple of months!”
Fourth BearDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:35 am [Reply]
MW: Wait, Adrian and Scott getting married brings things full circle to his relationship with Scott’s father? Verrrrrry interesting. Get Seth from 9CL over *this* strip, stat!
JP/RMMD: Nice to see both strips taking the Sunday off for a leisurely wine break. Although RMMD, which normally dominates when it comes to hilarious facial expressions, can only gape in wonder at the second panel of JP. A more perfect depiction of “Smug Douchebag at Rest (Again!)” I have never seen.
DT: Their super-duper, pinky-swear, triple-fudge secret operation *might* be a teeny bit more secure if they waited *inside* with The Abominable Dr. Phibes rather than on the street curb in the pouring rain. Doctor Orloff’s comments on Camelot are well considered, since this prisoner transfer looks to be starting off as well as Dallas 1963.
Charlie The Bursted CarbunkleDecember 5th, 2010 at 4:50 am [Reply]
Sunday’s Frazz: …And yet, you depict the average schoolteacher as an ineffectual boob. Sorry, triathlete, you can lecture me when you display a modicum of consistency.
I know Sabrina Online is a webcomic (and one done by a guy far better known for his furry porn) but seriously? A bloody doorway beating HAW HAW followed by thugs working him over with baseball bats, all because of some LOL U MAD? After the artist had two or three months to get over whatever real-life experience inspired this story? Whoops, I seem to have lost all my related bookmarks. One wild overreaction deserves another, I guess. (Pleeeeeeease don’t come beat me up, Eric.)
PBS: On the other hand, if you wanna send Jay and Silent Bob around to pay Pasty a visit, be my guest. How can so much work go into being ANTI-funny?
Mutts: Oh, EW. I normally love this strip, but EW. EW EW EW EWIE EWIE EW.
Monty: Best sound effect ever. Also, EW.
Mr. O'MalleyDecember 5th, 2010 at 5:03 am [Reply]
I messed up on “But Not For Me”. That line is actually part of the chorus. The verse ends up:
I never want to hear from any cheerful Pollyannas,
Who tell you Fate supplies a mate – It’s all bananas! @Alfred E. Neuman (#88):
Hooray for Mister Trail, the famous nature writer
(Did someone call me “smiter”?)
Hooray hooray hooray
He has no time for cuteness
But uses his astuteness
In punishing hirsuteness
Hooray hooray hooray
He rescues pet raccoons
Fights gators in lagoons
Has misplaced word balloons
Hooray hooray hooray
He’s always very plucky
At saving deer named Lucky
He thinks his wife is yucky
Hooray hooray hooray
Though Kelly may be busty
She can’t make Mark get lusty
He’ll go endanger Rusty
Hooray hooray hooray
Lives with creatures in defiance
Of the principles of science
They all are mutant giants
Hooray hooray hooray
You stole my friend’s pet bear
And you have facial hair
So you don’t have a prayer
Hooray hooray hooray
December 5th, 2010 at 5:42 am [Reply]
@ElkMeadow (#81): Well, Mordred still has to get loose from Dick Tracy first. And who wouldn’t want to?
Baron BizarreDecember 5th, 2010 at 7:47 am [Reply]
Alternate punchline for today’s Snuffy Smith:
“But, Paw, we’re just two generations out o’ the caves!”
AmateurDecember 5th, 2010 at 8:53 am [Reply]
MW: “. . . but I’ll (hic) drink to pretty much anything else!”
The RidgerDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:17 am [Reply]
@Apeman (#76): There are far too many dogs that get along with cats for that to be true. In fact, dogs don’t hate cats. Dogs just tend to chase things that run away from them, and most things smaller than them do run.
wossnameDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:23 am [Reply]
A3G – She did not knock you off your bike, you moron! However, I guess we have to accept this revisionist history of the nonaccident and move on. My next question is whether the romance that’s obviously in the works will be Iris and Mr. Brooks, or Tommie and Mr. Brooks. He looks a little young for Iris.
Hi & Lois – Ha ha, it’s funny because it’s cold in December. And they’re outside and it’s cold. And snowing. Ha. Ha.
JP – OMG what has happened to Abbey’s hair? It’s bubblegum pink. Revenge of the color monkeys! Does nobody check these things?
MT – Hey now, narration box, I already knew the difference between antlers and horns – I did not learn it from last week’s MT.
MW – “His late father and I were like brothers… and best of all, he wears pumpkin-orange suits, just like I do!”
Also, we have another clue to what made Jill bitter and cynical – I bet you an internet dollar she was in a bad marriage that fell apart when she was very young. She did get over being drunk pretty fast, didn’t she!
RMMD – Your brain is scrambled? Why is your brain scrambled? You thought Stu was going to beat up Jason King, you got the pat-down getting into City Hall, and then you found Stu and Jason making nice. How did that scramble your brain? And June – you can’t sleep at night because you can’t imagine what goes on in Washington? Why don’t you just stop trying? Geez. Good thing Berna’s going to win the lottery and we can quit listening to you two complain about nothing.
SF – Win.
PV – That “strange evidence” is clearly a carving of initials: “P+I” Weren’t you ever in high school, Galahad?
@Fashion Police (#64): June’s eyes are always the same color as whatever she’s wearing.
The RidgerDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:28 am [Reply]
@wossname (#97): Is June from Emerald City then? That would explain … well, nothing, I suppose, but it would be funny.
Écureuil ÉcumantDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:29 am [Reply]
Arch: Gotta be impressed by a geek who’s still running CP/M off a 5-1/4 floppy. Dil do that.
gleebDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:35 am [Reply]
Brenda: Rifles! Broken glass! Horse-nudging!
Pluggers: …like to screw motor vehicles.
Slylock: I believe M le Comte. Bell did what anyone would when confronted by a green-skinned man in a caftan and top hat. He gave a false name.
Zippy: Actually not bad. Not great, but not bad. For Zippy, that’s a high mark.
Rex: Should a guy with a scrambled brain really be drinking?
Ghost-who-walks: The Phantom makes a wish. I bet it’s for more kidnappers to rough up.
Mary: Finally Jill is making sense. She’s had enough already.
‘bean: The teacher despises his students so much, he’s willing to endure environmental disaster if it means seeing less of them. Ha!
OneEyedWolfdogDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:36 am [Reply]
Saturday Jumble: That’s Numberwang!
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoDecember 5th, 2010 at 10:18 am [Reply]
9CL: Brooke’s been playing with the laser pointer again. All snark aside, this is a nicely done Solange strip.
Zits: Jeremy, Too Dumb To Live.
Ink Pen: OMFG! This is made of WIN! Dolly’s looking pretty hawt. . . .
OtH: cartoon physics at its finest.
GF & PBS: treading the same punny waters.
JP: colormonkey fail, Abby’s megenta hair.
NS: just had to put the devil horns on the Microsoft expy, didn’t you?
PV: d’awwwwwwwwwwwww. Poteet’s gonna love this.
Lio: heee! evil Sesame Street hooligans, obviously.
Bizarro: o dear. This is Pastisian in it’s Anvilicity.
MT: nice two-parter.
MG&G: /facepalm. I was not expecting that.
PMP: Mad Men goes Inuit.
RMMD: but is it an Oki merlot?
SFx: the crimes get pettier, the Count gets wackier. Count, buddy, it’s time to lay off the home-brew LSD, is all I’m sayin’.
standard oversnark disclaimer.
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoDecember 5th, 2010 at 10:31 am [Reply]
@commodorejohn (#52): *googles*
hrm.
some of those Minerva Minks are not like the others. . . . .
Baka GaijinDecember 5th, 2010 at 10:42 am [Reply]
@wossname (#97) on Mary Worth: Anyone normal person would sober up quicklike when threatened with salmon squares and a patented platitude-a-thon.’
PS-Take your Sunday snark to the new thread.
ms. docweaselDecember 5th, 2010 at 12:18 pm [Reply]
Well, there is a report that Ghostbusters III is set to start filming soon, so you may be on to something.
HASTY
TUNED
KOSHER
BANDIT
THEY “DATED”
LUJBEM FEJFDecember 5th, 2010 at 2:57 pm [Reply]
@bats :[ (#70): We have a winner! The Blisters are a group from Chicago that has Jeff Tweedy’s, of Wilco, son in it. They rock! (As does Wilco) They we on the Sponge Bob soundtrack (Just a Kid!) as well as those Quaker Oats commercials for a year or so ago. Good eye Bats. Josh, get a paper!
Doctor HandsomeDecember 5th, 2010 at 9:42 pm [Reply]
@LUJBEM FEJF (#106): They print comics on paper now? I’ll be damned.
Please read the posting and discussion policies before posting. You are not required to supply an e-mail address to comment; however, doing so decreases the likelihood of your comment being flagged as spam. E-mail addresses will never be made public or seen by anyone but the site writers, who may use them to communicate with commentors. Leave a Reply« Name
« Website
Line and paragraph breaks are automatic. If you are HTML-savvy, you can use the following tags:
« Metapost: Comments of the week, for your weekend Everyone learns to love OR ELSE » 
Like the site? Say it with cash! Your generous contributions keep this site strong and independent. Thanks! You too can advertise on blogs All the cool kids… 
…buy Comics Curmudgeon merchandise!
Randomly Selected Post O’ Mystery Vote Trail for ... something! Posting and discussion policies Privacy policy Email Josh Mobile / Lo-Fi Version All post content © 2004–2010 Joshua Fruhlinger. Comics reproduced here for purposes of review only, and all rights remain with their creators; please don't sue me. All comments remain the property and responsibility of those who posted them. Blog powered by WordPress, which is way cool. Hosting provided by ServInt Internet Services, who are lovely people. Site designed by the charming and talented Adam Norwood; logo designed by the talented and charming Francesco Marciuliano. This blog was once known as I Read The Comics So You Don't Have To. It is in no way affiliated with Funny Paper, which used to read the comics so you don't have to, and may do so again. Are you still reading this? Why are you still reading this? A.L.
0 comments:
Post a Comment