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Thursday, June 30, 2011

Also, she’s resisting the impulse to extend the thumb and make an “L”

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Anyone else feel bad for Lu Ann here? Look at that innocent smile in the second panel. She ... actually thinks this person is psychic. This person could tell her she's a mongoose and she'd believe it. I guess Margo and Tommie are being economical, since a real psychic would probably cost a bit more than some crazy woman in the middle of the woods somewhere, and because giving Lu Ann a mind reading would be like reading War and Peace, except all of the words have been replaced with adorable puppy pictures." --Tophat

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Beetle Bailey, 6/25/11

The unfunny absurdity of Sarge and Cookie angrily pelting each other with meatballs doesn’t even deserve comment; I am, however, mildly charmed by Beetle and Killer’s decision to really get into their roles as seconds in this duel and dress up in dueling-era Ye Olde Garbe. Also, have we ever really seen any kind of relationship between Killer and Cookie? This seemingly random selection of a second says a lot about the cook’s sad, friendless life.

Herb and Jamaal, 6/25/11

Pride’s still a sin, right? GOD CAN SEE YOUR THOUGHT BALLOONS, REV.

Apartment 3-G, 6/25/11

Oh, look, Margo waited a whole five minutes before mercilessly mocking Lu Ann’s beliefs! I’m pretty sure this is her version of being a good friend on Lu Ann’s birthday.

This entry was posted on Saturday, June 25, 2011 at 09:12 am and is filed under Apartment 3-G, Beetle Bailey, Herb and Jamaal. | 170 responses to “Also, she’s resisting the impulse to extend the thumb and make an “L”” Old School Allie Cat
June 25th, 2011 at 9:24 am [Reply]

A3G – I think the Margo hand-to-forehead gesture is kind of elegantly drawn, and pure Margo. I’d rather see that than 9CL hand sex any day.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 9:44 am [Reply]

intersqueecies BFFs. (video, also features awesome African accents.)

Congrats, New York! (pic somewhat related.)

best comic/superhero mashup ever?

ikkle bat-eared fox.

Hibbleton
June 25th, 2011 at 9:44 am [Reply]

Love is…dime store ukuleles.

Rose is Love is…discovering ribbed condoms.

BB: I was going to ask my uncle, who turns 102 this year, if he’d seen this strip before, but I realized he was only born in 1909.

6 chix: “bronzed”? My previously mentioned uncle stopped making bronzed jokes when he gave up wearing high-button shoes.

Dustbin: “Fucking bitch” (I like to think he said).

FW: I hate racial stereotypes in the comics but if Cayla busted a cap in his ass, I’d be okay with it.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 9:46 am [Reply]

oops, forgot the corgsqui.

pugfuggly
June 25th, 2011 at 9:46 am [Reply]

BB: I guess when you live in tight quarters like these guys do, you have to keep coming up with more and more intricate sex games to keep things interesting.

Also, are Sarge and Cookie brothers, or does everyone just end up looking like that after so many years in their unit?

A3G You know what would be more interesting than this? An actual strip called ‘Madame Margo the Mysterious’, wherein the titular character berates her customers with cutting sass and air-quotes.

-What can you tell me about my future, Madam Margo?

-I see that in the future, you will be less trusting of “psychics” who ask for payment upfront. *cackles* Now move along bub, I’ve got more sheep to fleece…

MT: I see that by now, even the squirrel has pieced together who the thieves are…

Scott Bot
June 25th, 2011 at 10:00 am [Reply]

BB – Didn’t I see Meatball Wars on an episode of iCarly? Oh, well, I guess I shouldn’t complain, at least they’re stealing their lame jokes from a source that’s in this century.

JP – They’ve got a depressed woman on the ledge of a building threatening to jump, half the NYPD is there, and they’re worried about Alan’s feelings? Must be nice to have your name on the strip..

Pluggers – You’re a Plugger if you believe damn near anything your husband tells you.

seismic-2
June 25th, 2011 at 10:07 am [Reply]

A3G: “Change is what life is all about,” says the woman who has had a different hair style for one and a half weeks in the past 25 years.

JP: If the Judge and Constance are in fact “really connecting” up on the roof, then Broadway Bill’s Babes and Barristers Bonkin’ could be the worst Web cam show to be inflicted on us since the Bangin’ on the Brussels Bosendorfer arc.

MT: With that “alibi” today that identifies himself as Myson’s accomplice in the burglaries, Mark is digging himself into a deep hole. Therefore, next week he will poke himself in the back with a stick.

Ellie
June 25th, 2011 at 10:07 am [Reply]

The shoes worn by Sarge and Cookie have to weigh at least 5 lbs each.

Effluvius Erratus, CmD
June 25th, 2011 at 10:09 am [Reply]

S-M: Most superhero comics run into trouble because the writers keep make the hero more and more super so the crooks and villains have to get more and more powerful and gimmicky, and it all gets rather ridiculous, but delightfully so. Superman, for instance, was originally fast, strong, and invulnerable. Over time, jumping over buildings became flying and other powers, like heat and X-ray vision, super-breath, and super-hearing were grafted on, and so to make it sporting, he went from fighting regular gangsters to fighting bowler-hat wearing trans-dimensional aliens and green and purple-clad androids and mad scientists.

On the other hand, Newspaper Spider-Man has the opposite dynamic going on: The titular hero gets lamer and lamer, and so the criminals have to get dumber and dumber. Today, the local crimes lords, who must have been competent enough at one time to seize, hold, and administer the rackets in their territories, appear to impressed by a total stranger with no name, no reputation, no plan and whose black fedora-trench coat combo appears to be coated in phosphorus, completely negating the ostensible purpose of the black fedora-trench coat combo, i.e., blending into crowds and hiding in shadows.

Curiously enough, the end result of this power-down dynamic is almost the same as the power-up dynamic. Ridiculousness. But without the delight.

Nerd Patrol
June 25th, 2011 at 10:14 am [Reply]

H&J: The screaming came to a sudden and complete stop the instant they noticed the priest was there? Somehow, I don’t think “pride” is the deadly sin we should be worrying about.

Pseudo3D
June 25th, 2011 at 10:18 am [Reply]

9CL – When did you start growing your own thoughts, Amos?

DT – Sam has been acting a bit more creepy since Staton & Curtis. Still, it gives him personality and makes him a more likable character.

FW – I suggest you start running, Summer. It will save you further embarrassment.

MT – Sounds a little weird there, Mark.

S-M – “I’ll buy him a bigger television with hundreds of channels! That will put him away for good!”

MW – The meddling was too much for her to take!

In fact, reading Mary Worth is a bit like a toned-down, comic-book version of those “Dear Abby” columns.

Mary Worth: My co-worker and boyfriend, “Drew” refuses my advances. I threw a birthday party for him and always pop out of nowhere. We had sex once, but I don’t think he gets it. Now, because I’m always sending texts and playing Angry Birds on my iPhone, I’m about to get sacked.

Signed,
Creeper in Charterstone”

Scott Bot
June 25th, 2011 at 10:36 am [Reply]

S-M – Ok, let me make sure I understand what’s going on. The Crime Boss Stereotypes Amalgamated concern is threatened by the laziest superhero on the planet, so they’re putting their trust a guy in a glow-in-the-dark Halloween costume. I am reading this correctly, aren’t I?

TheDiva
June 25th, 2011 at 10:37 am [Reply]

BB: I’m impressed Camp Swampy actually has a couple of top hats and greatcoats available for duel supervision purposes.

H&J: Hey Reverend, you know how when you’re driving down the highway and you see a cop car ahead, so you immediately drop speed to about five below the limit, and then when he’s out of sight you go back to whatever you were doing? Same concept.

C’shaft: If this were a sci-fi B-movie from the ’50s, this would end with Cranky’s domain burning down around him while onlookers shake their head and say things like, “He tampered in God’s domain.”

Please let this be a sci-fi B-movie from the ’50s.

FW: “Actually, I was talking to Cayla.”

The ‘Mudges, being the genre savvy folk they are, have no doubt heard of the Idiot Plot–a plot which gets dragged out because nobody can rub together two brain cells to come up with the simple, obvious solution. Is there a term for a plot when the characters do recognize a simple, obvious solution, and then ignore it anyway? I humbly suggest “Effin’ Moron Plot.”

MT: Nudge-nudge, say no MORE! (Seriously, Mark, don’t say another word about your trip up Brokeback Mountain with John Thrasher here.)

MW: Wait, so why does Liza ignore Drew when he tells her they’ve broken up multiple times, but she immediately caves when Mary says it? Is Mary like the Pope of Santa Royale, and whatever she says is assumed to be a direct edict from God Himself?

PBS: That’s as good an explanation as any for social networking.

SM: “Now stand back! I’ve been shuffling my feet on the carpet for hours and I’ve built up an INCREDIBLE static charge!”

Mary Wroth
June 25th, 2011 at 10:39 am [Reply]

@Pseudo3D (#11): Dear Creeper,

Your mistake was having sex with the man, you hussy. Why would he but the cow when he can get the milk for free, and apparently, your milk is sour anyway. I was married for 55 years and didn’t have sex even once up to the day my dear saucy Jack passed on to his reward. Now I’m moderately wealthy, retired in sunny California, and stringing along another gentleman and intend to re-retire to a private island in the south Aegean. Such could have been your future, if you hadn’t screwed it up, literally.

Tough titty,
Mary

Alan's Addiction
June 25th, 2011 at 10:51 am [Reply]

Wow, there’s something I never noticed until today; Sarge and Cookie appear to be either the same person, or clones. I’d love to see the second option played out, with Sarge/Cookie being the end result of a decades-long, unethical experiment into human cloning. The former option could also be interesting, if it’s played out in a sort of good vs evil, duality of man thing that ends by revealing that the real Sarge is actually a special forces soldier caught and tortured by the Taliban; who then made up the whole Camp Swampy in his mind as a means of resisting interrogation and keeping his morale up.
That reverend in “Herb and Jamaal” appears to be completely oblivious to the dirty looks that the other characters are giving each other. This means he’s less of a “referee” and more of an “ineffective cease-fire that gives both sides time to militarily restore themselves.” But, hey, it’s “Herb and Jamaal,” all the characters are forced to delude themselves to some extent as a way to escape their hellishly boring and nonspecific existence.
Today reveals exactly why we all read and love “Apartment 3G;” Margo’s melodramatic sniping at her roommates. Today, we see a gesture almost as good as the infamous air quotes, and I’ll be disappointed if it’s not made into a T-shirt. Before I take apart the rest of the comic, let us bask in the glory of that insane gesture/body language in the last panel… Ah, I feel restored from a tiresome week. Anyway, I psychically predict that this little interlude is being used as some sort of foreshadowing to an upcoming, major A3G storyline that will end with Margo being forced to eat her words. Or, because the A3G writers aren’t that gifted at telling a story, this psychic visit was done solely to provide us with Margo’s pose in the last panel. I desperately hope it’s the second option, because if the A3G writers forget about the ridiculously improbable storylines and just start pandering to the readership, it would be awesome. Also, because then Margo would have absolutely no incentive to change her behavior, and we’ll get many more years of her malevolently haranguing her friends.

BigTed
June 25th, 2011 at 10:56 am [Reply]

So Sarge is getting together with a group of men to hit them with balls get them to “realize the hardness of the things”? I’m no psychologist, but I’m pretty sure I know what this dream means.

Rusty
June 25th, 2011 at 11:22 am [Reply]

Sarge will be taking more balls to the chin than Johny Bench.

Mibbitmaker
June 25th, 2011 at 11:25 am [Reply]

Somewhere in between Locher’s Dick Tracy and the current version of the strip is some perfectly good pacing just waiting to come out.

A3G: The difference between A3G and MW — in MW, that last Margo pose would’ve been played in earnest. (win: Margo)

Betw. Frien.: Gender narcissism (which, on the other side, would be called “male chauvinist pigs”)

Blondie: The original Shoe did this bit first… and much, much better.

Rocky Stoneaxe
June 25th, 2011 at 11:26 am [Reply]

@Liam (#y43):

Apartment 3G – What nice friends you have. They get you a psychic reading and then they mock it. A lesbian sex story would have been better.

@Swordsmith (#y45):

How is this NOT a lesbian love story, again?

You both might want to check out this 1950s novel by former comic-book scribe Patricia Highsmith (writing as “Claire Morgan”):

http://library2.usask.ca/srsd/pulps/full/price_of_salt-F.jpg

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 11:28 am [Reply]

@BigTed (#16): +1 internet cigar (that’s just a cigar) for you, sir!

Anonymous
June 25th, 2011 at 11:29 am [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#Y9): I got a 403 forbidden on my home machine. I tried hitting refresh. My computer actually raised its voice to say “Four Oh Three, didn’t you HEAR me?” I have no idea what you found, but maybe it’s better this way.

I also have no idea what my hair color is. “Concrete” is my best guess. Which is why I dye it. Wouldn’t it be cool if we had patterned hair like dogs do?

Katy
June 25th, 2011 at 11:30 am [Reply]

@Anonymous (#21): Damn it, that was me.

Mibbitmaker
June 25th, 2011 at 11:30 am [Reply]

GA: This is sick! Susan-licking-poison-envelopes-on-Seinfeld sick.

GT: Hobart is the dirt beneath Rubin’s soapbox.

Sherman’s Lagn.: Uh-oh, Stephan Pastis! You’ve been one-upped on a certain metaphor…

Ziggy: NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!!!

Doctor Handsome
June 25th, 2011 at 11:42 am [Reply]

I can’t hide from my feelings any longer: I’m hopelessly in love with Margo Magee.

Greg
June 25th, 2011 at 11:57 am [Reply]

Herb and Jamaal: Am I the only one who’s bothered that these black people are not black? Is it really so hard to break out the zip tone for a more accurate flesh depiction? And doesn’t the artist see this as sort of racist to show black people as white? Seriously, they all look like negro albinos.

FW: Les has his hand in his pocket, in front of his daughter. I think you can see where I’m going with this…

Rocky Stoneaxe
June 25th, 2011 at 12:05 pm [Reply]

@Greg (#25):

I like the way Cory Thomas depicts his characters:

http://www.gocomics.com/watchyourhead

els
June 25th, 2011 at 12:07 pm [Reply]

This Beetle Bailey is the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen. I’ve been staring at it for fully ten minutes, getting angrier and angrier, and now I’m just a seething ball of rage. Why are two of the background shrubs black while the third one is green? Why is Sarge’s ear on his chin? Why is the handle on Sarge’s meatball-pot essentially unattached on one side? God, this is pissing me off. Is Cookie really left-handed, or was it simply more convenient to draw it that way? Why are they dueling in the first place? How the hell is that paltry distance “forty paces”? I… I need a drink.

commodorejohn
June 25th, 2011 at 12:15 pm [Reply]

Agnes – See, Brooke? This is how you get away with being dirty in the funny pages: you just do it, and leave off with the sniggery tee-hee-heeing.

A3G – I thought it was “Maulin’ Margo the Massacre?”

Curtis – You know what I hate? Killjoys who think children should get summer jobs. Fuck you, they’re kids! They’ll be forced into wage-slave drudgery soon enough, you don’t need to begrudge them the brief period of freedom and joy in their lives, you miserable old bastards.

FW – “Mope, mope mope. Mope?” “Mope mope.” “Mope!”

GT – Okay, nice look of craggy concern on Gil there.

JP – What’s with the jazz hands? Did Constance have a brief stint in Mary Worth before appearing in Judge Parker?

Liō – I still think Osaka did this best.

Luann – Why the hell does it matter, Brad? Your relationship is in perpetual stasis because you refuse to allow it to move forward like normal people do anyway. The only difference between your current relationship and no relationship at all is that there’ll be one less character hanging around and smarming about people who dare not to have a generic suburban middle-class life like you.

Mandrake – Won’t come back from Aldo’s curve!

MT – Mega-Squirrel takes an interest in the case!

MW – Has anyone ever looked less sorry than Mary while saying “I’m sorry?”

Phantom – Protip: do not take dating advice from a man in purple Spandex and stripey shorts.

RMMD – Power-scowl!

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 12:22 pm [Reply]

@commodorejohn (#28): re Lio comment: I was SO thinking of that scene! (get out of my head!) :-P

Baka Gaijin
June 25th, 2011 at 12:24 pm [Reply]

Herb and Jamaal: I’m sorry to contradict Josh but the pair stopped bickering because they’re reading the words inside their eyes, à la Terminator, analyzing the Reverend’s Bozo-shaped head to determine if he’s an friendly clown (0% Match) or an EVILSCARYCLOWN (100% Match!!!).

Baka Gaijin
June 25th, 2011 at 12:26 pm [Reply]

Dennis the Menace: “I can see why Mr. Wilson married her.” Mrs. Wilson’s either wearing her dress with the transparent crotch panel again or her vaginal vault is seriously prolapsing. Wear some drawers, woman!

Baka Gaijin
June 25th, 2011 at 12:35 pm [Reply]

Mary Worth: “How can you speak for Drew?” “I’ve been manipulating him like a marionette for years. How could you miss those black threads coming from his limbs?”

Baka Gaijin
June 25th, 2011 at 12:42 pm [Reply]

Marvin: The waitress is wretching her guts out. Your stank-ass diaper struck again.*

Spiderman: Mystery Mob Boss is actually Reed Hastings, Netflix CEO. Need I say more?

* Didactic Duo: Is “stank-ass” hyphenated?

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 12:43 pm [Reply]

@Katy-nonymous (#21): can we meet cute with matching brindle hair? I’ve always liked brindles. :-)

as to the other, it’s the same issue (cookies?) that happens with some of the other links around here. Basically, just select the URL in the address bar and hit enter, it should show up. (did for me, anyways.)

you could experiment with this totally G-rated, adorably cute nautilus girl pic as a proof of concept. (no isopod girls, sorry. I looked.)

MyUsernamesMud
June 25th, 2011 at 12:43 pm [Reply]

Those look less like meatballs and more like clumps of hair. Sure it’s fun to imagine Beetle an co. eating pubes all day, but Sarge probably isn’t going to suffer any permanent bodily harm. Which is kind of a downer.

Charterstoned
June 25th, 2011 at 12:54 pm [Reply]

A3G – Whew! I’m glad Margo identified herself in today’s panel. I thought she was Camille.

Liam
June 25th, 2011 at 12:58 pm [Reply]

BB-So today’s strip looks like a continuation of yesterday’s strip. Judging by past indications if Cookie gets hit by one of his meatballs he won’t be doing much of anything and Sarge shall celebratre by feasting on your corpse.

Blondie-Actually Milo you are being sent to another type of camp. Your parents are just being nice and telling you it’s a day camp.

Dennis the Menace-Those aren’t the cookies that Mr. Wilson married her for but they are just as tasty.

Apartment 3G-Margo is such a cunt.

fluffy
June 25th, 2011 at 1:04 pm [Reply]

In the spirit of Garfield Minus Garfield and YouTube edits showing sitcoms without the laugh track, I present to you: Herb and Jamaal Minus Thought Balloons

commodorejohn
June 25th, 2011 at 1:04 pm [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#34): D’aww…

(I thought I once saw an isopod-girl somewhere, but I’ve never been able to find the picture again. Maybe I should just draw one sometime…)

Scott Bot
June 25th, 2011 at 1:07 pm [Reply]

@fluffy (#38): At first I read this as ‘Herb and Jamaal Minus Thought’ and my first reaction was ‘how can you tell the difference?’

Baka Gaijin
June 25th, 2011 at 1:08 pm [Reply]

@Rusty (#17): I thought Sarge took more balls to the chin than Beetle or did I get that backwards?

@Greg (#25): I’m sure if Gallop took a poll of black people, the majority would be happy to leave them not black.

@els (#27): Yes, a drink. A drink is what you need.

@Liam (#37): “Margo is such a cunt.” And that’s why we love her so.

zerowolf
June 25th, 2011 at 1:15 pm [Reply]

A3G I always thought it was Mistress Margo the Sadist. However if this is foreshadowing Madame Margo turning A3G into a bordello and she’ll be pimping out Lu Ann and Tommie, I’m all for it.

zerowolf
June 25th, 2011 at 1:17 pm [Reply]

FC: Mommy says Daddy came first, then the egg.

Rusty
June 25th, 2011 at 1:21 pm [Reply]

@Baka Gaijin (#41): I’m uncertain about the whole “pitcher-catcher” dynamic and how it may apply to the oral sex.

Poteet
June 25th, 2011 at 1:31 pm [Reply]

Belated tossed flowers for Tophat and the other float-riders! This was a particularly funny COTW list, and I appreciate the guffaws.

Poteet
June 25th, 2011 at 1:38 pm [Reply]

MT — Elrodball, maybe it’s time to accept reality and stick to brown mammals and birds from now on, so the color monkeys can always safely use the brown they love so well and make the MT images into recognizable wildlife species from this planet. Seeing that poor brown whiskeyjack yesterday was just painful.

Anonymous
June 25th, 2011 at 1:40 pm [Reply]

Dual undertakers keep careful watch.
Ready to cart away at least one meatball and blood soaked overweight middle aged body.

Écureuil Écumant
June 25th, 2011 at 1:47 pm [Reply]

MT: “I’ve been with him for three days!” Now Mark, that’s a bald faced lie. You, the king of France, and twenty thousand men / Marched up the hill, and then marched down again. You’ve been in the same zip code, that’s the extent of it. If you’d been with him the whole time, you’d look considerably more depleted. Never thought I’d see Troop Captain Integrity tell a whopper.

On the other hand, here we have a sheriff who inflates a string of afterhours burgs to a robbery spree. Instead of a salary, he gets a percent commission based on the charges?

@47: Indians scattered on dawn’s highway bleeding ghosts crowd a child’s fragile eggshell mind.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 1:47 pm [Reply]

@Rusty (#44):

catchers gotta catch. (brings new meaning to the term ‘the high hard one’, don’t it?)

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 1:50 pm [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#49): much less the “split finger” or, Gil Thorp forbid, the “spitter.”

*ducks for cover*

Ktrout
June 25th, 2011 at 2:06 pm [Reply]

Clearly Margo’s cosmology is Heraclitean.

GarrisonSkunk
June 25th, 2011 at 2:10 pm [Reply]

Seems logical to me, Josh. Killer always goes out on dates and never is around at mealtime to eat Cookie’s food. Therefore he would be the only person on camp willing to be the cook’s second.

Buck Ripsnort
June 25th, 2011 at 2:31 pm [Reply]

s-m: I’ve finally figured out what bugs me about Big Boss — I mean, besides the empty promises and the coat painted w/ phosphorus — HE DOESN’T HAVE A HEAD. Snarkless.

JesseBaker
June 25th, 2011 at 2:55 pm [Reply]

Kind of disappointed that they didn’t string out Mary crapping upon Liza’s stalker dreams one more day, so that the big moment where she realizes Drew doesn’t love her happened on the Sunday strip. That way they could have gotten a wicked reaction shot of Mary crapping all over Liza’s delusions and us seeing the exact moment where Liza realizes that her dreams of becoming a pampered Doctor’s wife are never going to happen.

As for Mark Trail; I kind of doubt that they will extend the arc even further with the idea that the sheriff secretly knowing that his mustachioed son is the thief and trying to railroad Mark and the mountain man as the real thieves out of a desire to protect his asshole son, no matter what. Mark will probably have no trouble establishing the mountain man’s innocence via the alibi that he provides for him. And the mustachioed son will get caught, ironically when the sheriff’s underlings discover that he bought a pair of shoes like the ones that left the footprint. The only question will be whether or not mustache guy justifies his crimes as being a way to spite his dad for neglecting him when he was growing up or if we find out that he’s simply pure evil.

Rusty
June 25th, 2011 at 2:55 pm [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#49): Yeesh. This whole tangent reminds me of one of the funniest things I have ever seen here, when Dingo referred to a comic character as a classic “power bottom.” That would be Sarge, should he be catching.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 2:56 pm [Reply]

@commodorejohn (#39): is this what you had found before?

there’s also a much more isopody and much less girly one on DA here.

yeah, I’m bored.

Stroker Ace
June 25th, 2011 at 3:03 pm [Reply]

A3G – Is Margo having a hot flash in panel 3? God willing her ‘change’ is early menopause.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 3:11 pm [Reply]

@Rusty (#55):

yeah, I hear you. I can be clever, I can be raunchy, and on rare good days cleverly raunchy. Dingo was routinely, unabashedly, brilliantly raunchy. I miss his posts, and hope that he is recovering his health. *thinks good thoughts in Dingo’s general direction*

Anonymous
June 25th, 2011 at 3:13 pm [Reply]

@JesseBaker (#54): “The only question will be whether or not mustache guy justifies his crimes”

He wears his justification on his upper lip.

bats :[
June 25th, 2011 at 3:13 pm [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#56): who comes UP with these ideas?!?

Baka Gaijin
June 25th, 2011 at 3:22 pm [Reply]

@Rusty (#55): At least there won’t be turkey legs involved.

NoahSnark
June 25th, 2011 at 3:24 pm [Reply]

Here’s a question Reverend – would it be a sin for you to put two rusty chainsaws on the coffee table and leave the house for a couple of hours?

Baka Gaijin
June 25th, 2011 at 3:29 pm [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#58): I too am sending healing thoughts Dingo’s way. With a major ocean and a couple large mountain ranges in the way, I hope I’m using enough power.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 3:49 pm [Reply]

@Baka Gaijin (#63): throw another clown into the boiler, just to be sure.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

@bats :[ (#60): “if you can imagine it, there’s an isopod of it.”

I forget which Rule # that is. . . .

Artist formerly known as Ben
June 25th, 2011 at 3:50 pm [Reply]

BB: A hearty thanks to Mort Walker. When I woke up this morning I said, “You know what would hit the spot? A food fight officiated by Mandrake the Magician and Slash.”

H&J: “Icy silence? Hostile body language? My work here is done. Time to hit the links.”

A3G: “Margo the Mysterious” is not bad at all, although it has a ways to go to catch up to “Margo the Malevolent.”

Phantom: “You know it, kid. But word to the wise. Watch out for chicks who have their own warships. When they get clingy…”

RMMD: So Wilson and Nolan are really serious about Kelly being Summer’s daughter, huh? This family must have the reproductive cycle of Tribbles.

Lockhorns: Al Swearingen isn’t interested in your marital woes, Leroy.

DtM: That’s right, Dennis. That and something that rhymes with “schmegnancy scare.”

H-Cliff: Golf would be a very different game if the holes expanded every time they saw those tasty, tasty balls coming through. And sorry for all the people who will come to the site now after googling “tasty tasty balls.”

OBH: So how did the police know to look for Johnny Green’s DNA? AUGH! Unthink, unthink!

SFx: It’s Bravo2’s aspirational obesity programming.

Ziggy: Isn’t that song about how you have to perform in a restaurant because someone stole your identity? God, Ziggy is a dick.

FW: After brief demurral, Les lets Susan fall on her sword. That’s our hero all right.

S-M: Big Boss is just a fake gangster who makes his living swindling real gangsters, isn’t he? “I can’t tell you how to defeat Spider-Man now, but the answer is in my book Seven Habits of Highly Effective Arch-Criminals. That’s $30, postage not included. We also have t-shirts for sale.”

Bill Thompson
June 25th, 2011 at 3:57 pm [Reply]

@JesseBaker (#54): Trail could alibi JF Thrasher by showing Sheriff Dad that there are no mocassin prints in the Abandoned Mine Cave, just shoe prints, but the sheriff would turn that around by saying that Trail is wearing shoes.

I expect Sheriff Dad will put Trail and Thrasher in jail. After that the Cleancut Kids gang will decide on one final heist, because the town now thinks the crime wave is over. They’ll plan to rob the biggest store, then skip town.

[Old Man] Muffaroo
June 25th, 2011 at 3:58 pm [Reply]

Baby – This is what you get for exposing the child to those despicable Pluggers strips!

Family – “…Now pull my finger, crone, so I can rocket right off your old lap!”

Gil realizes too late he doesn’t have suspenders for that folksy, country-lawyer thing where he puts his thumbs under the straps. All he can do is absently caress his chest, which somehow sends the wrong message.

[Old Man] Muffaroo
June 25th, 2011 at 3:59 pm [Reply]

Mark was with John for three days, at the end of which time, the stone was rolled away, and it was seen that the cave was miraculously empty of consumer electronics! And lo, John’s sandal was clean of face powder to boot. Verily.

Spider-Man – Just don’t pull Big Boss’s finger. You’ll be electrocuted!

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#2): I’ve long harbored a desire to see WATCHMEN redrafted with the ACG characters. Perhaps it would have to be cut down a bit, but Rorschach is so obviously The Fat Fury that it would be a shame to waste it.

Artist formerly known as Ben
June 25th, 2011 at 4:00 pm [Reply]

@TheDiva (#13): Re Crankshaft: I’d watch the hell out of that movie.

[Old Man] Muffaroo
June 25th, 2011 at 4:01 pm [Reply]

@Anonymous (#21): When I get a 403, I usually can get past it by copying the URL, then pasting it and hitting Return, right there in the same window it was in when it said I was forbidden. (Just imagine if night-club bouncers were that easy! “Can i come in?” “D-uhhh, you can’t come in.” “Can I come in?” “Okay, go on in. D-uhhhhh!”

@Greg (#25): I’m not bothered by it. I think it takes more skill to make characters belong to a certain ethnic group with lines than it does to draw all faces alike and shading the hell out of them, or expecting the colorist to fix it for you.

@Baka Gaijin (#33): Is “stank-ass” hyphenated?
When the two words are used together to modify another word (“diaper”), then the answer is yes. “Retch” however, has no w before the r when it means “vomit.”

TheDiva
June 25th, 2011 at 4:13 pm [Reply]

@Artist formerly known as Ben (#66): re: FW: Naturally. As gratifying as having Susan trailing along pining after him has been for Les, the knowledge that she’s throwing her whole life away for his sake is even more satisfactory.

Calico
June 25th, 2011 at 4:20 pm [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#58):
I was actually thinking about Dingo this AM. Wishing him the best. : )

commodorejohn
June 25th, 2011 at 4:28 pm [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#56): Weirdly, no. (But it is adorable.) Not on FA either…huh.

Pseudo3D
June 25th, 2011 at 4:31 pm [Reply]

Baby Blues: I’m trying to figure out what four-letter word Wren said that starts with “M”.

commodorejohn
June 25th, 2011 at 4:34 pm [Reply]

@Pseudo3D (#75): “Milt?” Fish spunk is kind of an oddly specific thing for a kid to pick up the term for, but there you go.

John C Fremont
June 25th, 2011 at 4:34 pm [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#49): The mention of a “high hard one” always makes me think of Robert Smigel’s Black Sabbath Show.

Hey, Dingo! Hope you’re feeling all the positive energy being beamed your way!

Aviatrix
June 25th, 2011 at 4:47 pm [Reply]

@commodorejohn (#76): I learned about milt when I was a little kid. Parents took me to a fish ladder. I still remember this one giant tough-looking salmon, more than twice as big as any of the others.

mary_worthless
June 25th, 2011 at 5:06 pm [Reply]

@pugfuggly (#5):
And let’s not leave out, “More Zippers, Mule”!!

Aviatrix
June 25th, 2011 at 5:06 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#78): Also, the same word is Norwegian for “liver.”

SideshowJon
June 25th, 2011 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

Yesterday, Ziggy was complaining about debt. Today, Ziggy is eating (alone) at a 5-star restaurant. Must’ve gotten some decent yuan for that kidney.

Kinghasnoclothes
June 25th, 2011 at 5:23 pm [Reply]

FW: Everyone looks particularly heavy-lidded and cancer stricken in today’s strip.

Kinghasnoclothes
June 25th, 2011 at 5:25 pm [Reply]

FW: Actually, I think everyone in Lesworld is heavy-lidded because they all suffer from Pernicious Anemia.

True Fable
June 25th, 2011 at 5:46 pm [Reply]

Silly me, I thought that was exactly what Margo was doing.

Pseudo3D
June 25th, 2011 at 6:07 pm [Reply]

@mary_worthless (#79): Too bad that page is swamped with spam.

Uncle Lumpy
June 25th, 2011 at 7:03 pm [Reply]

@Pseudo3D (#85):

All cleaned up now. It’s like picking up litter at a national monument.

[Old Man] Muffaroo
June 25th, 2011 at 7:06 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#78): I learned about milt when I was a little kid. Parents took me to a fish ladder. I still remember this one giant tough-looking salmon, more than twice as big as any of the others.
“Him? Oh, that’s Big Milt!”

Rocky Stoneaxe
June 25th, 2011 at 7:10 pm [Reply]

@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#69):

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#2): I’ve long harbored a desire to see WATCHMEN redrafted with the ACG characters. Perhaps it would have to be cut down a bit, but Rorschach is so obviously The Fat Fury that it would be a shame to waste it.

Heck, I’d pay serious money to hear Rorschach say “You want I should bop you with this here lollipop?”

Rocky Stoneaxe
June 25th, 2011 at 7:40 pm [Reply]

@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#87):

“Him? Oh, that’s Big Milt!”

BWAHAHAHAHA!!!

http://www.tennysonhigh62.org/img/milt-vasis.jpg

TheDiva
June 25th, 2011 at 8:52 pm [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#91): And at #y53 too. Those short tank women sure are persistent.

Liam
June 25th, 2011 at 8:56 pm [Reply]

Mark Trail-Now what would two men in a cave for three days be doing if they weren’t out robbing electronic stores and eating the farmers’ livestock.

Sgt. Stoned
June 25th, 2011 at 9:23 pm [Reply]

MT: Notice the dreamy look of sexual contentment on Mark’s face as he prepares to tell Sheriff Sherlock about his three days in a cave with John Thrasher. “But I love him, Sheriff. I just KNOW he couldn’t be a criminal!”

MW: “The good news is that you can start over. Do you know what it is to be born again, Liza?”

Peanut Gallery
June 25th, 2011 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

@Pseudo3D (#75): “Merde.” Yes, it’s five letters, but Wren can’t count yet.

Peanut Gallery
June 25th, 2011 at 9:25 pm [Reply]

@TheDiva (#90):

Those short tank women sure are persistent.

Indeed, they are.

Aviatrix
June 25th, 2011 at 9:37 pm [Reply]

@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#87): Seriously, the biologist lady was picking up the dude fish and squirting the milt over the eggs. It made a great impression. No human has ever been able to measure up.

[Old Man] Muffaroo
June 25th, 2011 at 9:47 pm [Reply]

@TheDiva (#90): Those short tank women sure are persistent.
They have to be tough. They put up with a lot of teasing from other tank women about riding in “the short tank.”

[Old Man] Muffaroo
June 25th, 2011 at 9:51 pm [Reply]

@Pseudo3D (#75): I’m trying to figure out what four-letter word Wren said that starts with “M”.
Muck, perhaps. In the UK, that’s man milk. Spooge. Fanny batter. Twinkie refill. Jitler.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 25th, 2011 at 10:02 pm [Reply]

@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#97): euphoria fluid.

Rocky Stoneaxe
June 25th, 2011 at 10:50 pm [Reply]

@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#97):

The host used to give out cans of Spooge as door prizes on the UK version of Queen for a Day:

http://verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com/2010/12/demotivational-posters-spooge.jpg

“Look for Tesco Value Spooge in 410g cans, convenient 4-packs, and new 12-pack cases. Available in white, vanilla, chocolate and strawberry.”

Rocky Stoneaxe
June 25th, 2011 at 11:10 pm [Reply]

Marvel and DC artist GENE COLAN (Daredevil, Tomb of Dracula, Iron Man, Batman, Howard the Duck) passed away on Thursday, June 23:

http://herocomplex.latimes.com/2011/06/24/gene-colan-comic-book-artist-dead-at-84/#/0

Liam
June 25th, 2011 at 11:34 pm [Reply]

@Pseudo3D (#75):

Miak.

James
June 25th, 2011 at 11:41 pm [Reply]

If it wasn’t for a huge amount of food on his tray I wouldn’t have known that that fly young man with the backwards cap was Jughead.

Frank Lee Meidere
June 25th, 2011 at 11:56 pm [Reply]

GA: Up to now I’ve pretty much detested Gasoline Alley, but I have to admit, Mutt and Jeff’s casual reaction to the crushing death of a young kid is really appealing. It would be even better if the kid were actually dead, but we all know that he’s managed a miraculous off-screen escape somehow.

Lockhorns: I’m also not much of a Lockhorns fan, but I’m happy to see them honouring one of my childhood singing heroes: Robert Goulet.

Crankshaft: So, if the sauce itself is enough to cook the burgers, why does he keep lighting the damned grill and blowing himself up?

@commodorejohn (#28):
Curtis – You know what I hate? Killjoys who think children should get summer jobs. Fuck you, they’re kids! They’ll be forced into wage-slave drudgery soon enough, you don’t need to begrudge them the brief period of freedom and joy in their lives, you miserable old bastards.

I concur. It’s even worse in this case, considering the family seems to have come into money on a couple of occasions.

commodorejohn
June 26th, 2011 at 12:08 am [Reply]

@Frank Lee Meidere (#103): What really grates on me is the damn-near omnipresence of this theme in strips featuring any child characters past the “adorable tyke” years. It’s like half of the comics page is written by people who not-so-secretly hate kids but feel obligated to write child characters into their strips nonetheless. (The ur-example of course being For Better Or For Worse, I think.)

Rocky Stoneaxe
June 26th, 2011 at 12:25 am [Reply]

Sunday Beetle Bailey — Might as well change the name of this strip to
“BJ and the Bear”… with Sarge being the Bear:

http://www.jsonline.com/comics/32402404.html?feature_id=Beetle_Bailey

Bill Thompson
June 26th, 2011 at 12:44 am [Reply]

The Amusing Spiderman: His spider-sense is tingling! That can only mean one thing: he’s not about to get hit over the head. Not just yet.

Crankshaft: Crankshaft thinks baseball was better on a transistor radio? Do the research, Batiuk. Someone his age would remember radios with vacuum tubes, and no, those are not devices used to clean carpets.

Dick Tracy: I think all of us guessed that Doubleup wasn’t too bright. And it’s a bit late to start picking up clues in this arc.

Mike Curtis has written on the Gocomics forum that TMS has given permission to write longer story arcs, so the next one should have more substance.

commodorejohn
June 26th, 2011 at 1:00 am [Reply]

@Bill Thompson (#106): Ah, but you see, the transistor radio was invented in The Sixties, which everyone knows is the most important period in history, because that’s when Tom Batiuk grew up, and nothing important happened before Tom Batiuk existed.

Maggie the Cat
June 26th, 2011 at 1:16 am [Reply]

A3G- I wish instead of buying LuAnn as psychic reading for her birthday that Tommie and Margo would have just taught her a new word or perhaps given her a thesaurus.

“Wow! The sun is shining today! Spooky!”

“I like salt on my French fries, too! That’s spooky!”

“Oooh, spooky…. that Free Credit Report.com commercial is on again!”

Maggie the Cat
June 26th, 2011 at 1:18 am [Reply]

@Maggie the Cat (#108): Seriously LuAnn, there are other words!

Comcis Fan
June 26th, 2011 at 1:40 am [Reply]

FW: So, is this the “last dance,” by chance? Kind of a non-sequitur of a strip. A sudden ending of the feature would be preferable to any more Les-Cayla-Susan dreary kissing-video-scandal denoument.

CanuckDownSouth
June 26th, 2011 at 1:43 am [Reply]

Sure Tommie, you just go on telling yourself that Luann’s family is odd to avoid having to face how your mom comes and visits for an hour every decade or so. I’m sure the cards you imply she sends are all you need to give you a warm, supportive relationship.

Phantom – isn’t the reason to post two guards so that one could run off and get help as needed leaving the other to keep an eye on the situation? OTOH, this *is* the tribe that thought that the best placement for guards was to have them look all pretty and impressive facing directly away from the prisoner…

RMMD balances MT’s fact-based Sundays with medical misinformation day! Geez, it’s been decades since they established that ulcers are caused by bacteria. No diet, particularly a bland one, is helpful in general, although individuals may have to deal with particular irritants while drugs or surgery are used to treat the ulcer.

Baka Gaijin
June 26th, 2011 at 1:49 am [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#64): That’s a thought. When my 3-meter stick comes back from the cleaners, I can poke the clowns into the pit…

@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#68): “…Now pull my finger, crone, so I can rocket right off your old lap!” Oh ho ho! I’ll be Mary loves when Jeff Corey says that.

@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#71): OK, no hyphen in “wretch.” Gotcha.

@Liam (#91): It involves meatballs and chins.

Baka Gaijin
June 26th, 2011 at 2:17 am [Reply]

Sunday’s Strips

Marvin: Of course food tastes better outdoors. Not having to eat surrounded by Marvin’s diaper stench’ll do that.

Luann: Mr. DeGroot gets a crash course in being a bitch, a bitch, a big fat bitch! She’s the biggest bitch in the whole wide world! Excepting Canada for obvious reasons.

Hagar the Horrible: You’re a Viking. If you’re that horny, just go rape and pillage a village.

Baka Gaijin
June 26th, 2011 at 2:31 am [Reply]

Sherman’s Lagoon: The Crankshaft Paradox: “What if things are better without me?”

Rose is Rose: It was worth it to slog through all those brownies to get to the punch line. That wild-eyed look is priceless.

Zits: Methinks the weekday Hector is going to regret hiring Jeremy. Methinks.

Baka Gaijin
June 26th, 2011 at 2:44 am [Reply]

Slylock Fox

Mystery: Those footprints are a red herring. They were made by some guy who’s really really well hung wearing assless chaps. The real thief used moccasins covered in face powder. Check out that old cave in the hills that the kids used to play in.

Six Differences: Don’t just stand there gawking! As a certain Mr. Chamberlain found out, appeasement is a mistake. That fork is good for stabbing things other than weenies.

dale
June 26th, 2011 at 2:54 am [Reply]

A3G

Why did they travel upstate to find a psychic? Are there no fortunetellers in all of New York City?
Maybe it’s illegal in the city. That would explain it. Good thing they weren’t looking for drugs.

How did they get there? Do any of them drive?

Baka Gaijin
June 26th, 2011 at 3:11 am [Reply]

@dale (#116): Margo’s cover story to Luann is that she was going to live on a farm. The whole drive she stuck her head out of the car window, happy that she was going to see their little old doggie who disappeared one day to “live on the farm.”

Tristan J
June 26th, 2011 at 3:38 am [Reply]

I looked at that last panel and honestly thought she said ‘Margo the Murderous’. It disturbed, frightened and intrigued me. Then I looked again and realised it was actually boring.

This Guy
June 26th, 2011 at 4:09 am [Reply]

6/26
FT: Hey, Andy, he’s only following CDC guidelines. I applaud his initiative.

dale
June 26th, 2011 at 5:27 am [Reply]

@Baka Gaijin (#117):

The only time I see A3G is when it shows up here, so the stupid has to be really blatant for me to comment. I’m not buying the head out the window part. Maybe she was just singing nonsense syllables? All the damn way..

Baka Gaijin
June 26th, 2011 at 5:40 am [Reply]

@dale (#120): Head out the window, panting happily into the wind…like a dog going out to the “country” to live on the “farm.”

dale
June 26th, 2011 at 6:16 am [Reply]

@Baka Gaijin (#121):

I understood.
It just doesn’t seem practical at highway speed. Can dogs really do that at 65 mph?

gleeb
June 26th, 2011 at 6:19 am [Reply]

Cul: I like how the cone gets bigger.

Slylock: “The tire track is not from a bike.” How does he know? Because Slylock himself is the thief!

Rex: I hope this story reunites Joe Webster with his long-lost son, Cue. Instead, it’ll be about whatever dull problems Foster Woods has.

Phantom: The other great shame of the Wambesi is the need to wear Tina Turner wigs all the time.

Dick: Young Honeymoon Tracy is shocked that the Scarlet Sting movie has already been pirated, despite not yet being finished.

Baldo: Too talky.

Liam
June 26th, 2011 at 6:42 am [Reply]

@Comcis Fan (#110):

Get ready for another time jump.

Liam
June 26th, 2011 at 6:46 am [Reply]

MT-Even the squirrel wants to see John Thrasher arrested for stealing his nuts.

Bill Thompson
June 26th, 2011 at 6:52 am [Reply]

Hagar the Horrible: Hagar, how could you forget you’re a pagan? You should have invoked one of the Norse gods by name, instead of offering a Christian-style invocation. It looks like you summoned Odin’s wife, so of course you got frigged over.

The Great Artistes: Today Batiuk gave the world Funky instead of Les, and McEldowney realized that the world doesn’t want to see yet another one of his characters go unclothed. What caused this outbreak of mass (in terms of ego) sanity?

reFOOB: I don’t care if her husband slept with the entire Swedish Bikini Team. The latest display of pettiness makes me hope Lynn Johnston spends eternity in a place where everyone leaves the toilet seat up.

Baka Gaijin
June 26th, 2011 at 6:53 am [Reply]

@dale (#122): Do you really think Tommie Thompson drives more than 35 miles per hour? That’s why a ten minute psychic reading mid-state is a whole day outing.

Yes, I’ve seen dogs keep their heads out the windows at highway speeds. It helps if you have little goggles to keep the bugs out of their eyes.

wossname
June 26th, 2011 at 7:51 am [Reply]

MT – Mark neglected to mention how the loathsome, disease-ridden, bird-killing raccoon can be useful to mankind, but you’ll see the answer in BG/SS.

MW – “I know a fine physician, Dr. Morgan, who is looking for an office manager. Or perhaps you should try teaching. I’ve heard there’s a vacancy at Westview, Ohio, High School.”

RMMD – WTF? What happened to Summer and Kelli? Are we moving to the JP-style multiple story lines at once? Or is Sunday going to be a different story from the weekdays?

@Bill Thompson (#106): Thanks for the update on DT and word that the next arc may be longer. I agree with all those who’ve said that while we’re euphoric over the switch to Staton-Curtis, these stories were playing out too damn fast.

Ukulele Ike
June 26th, 2011 at 7:53 am [Reply]

A3G: Lily Dale, NY — the whackjob table-rapping community and real life “Ferndale” — is about a hour south of Buffalo. A good seven-hour drive from Manhattan. I enjoy the idea of Lu Anne sitting passively in the backseat for seven hours with no idea of where the hell they’re taking her.

Crank: I expected a cathedral-style table radio with vacuum tubes, too. But I agree with Lian @ 124. Batuik’s having a rough time making sense of Crankshaft’s age if he keeps showing him going to Abbott & Costello movies and Brooklyn Dodger games as a young man, so he’s slyly shifting his birth year up to 1940.

DickT: So Tribune Media Services get to dictate to the writer and artist how long the stories can be? I shouldn’t be surprised about that, but it still makes me sad. Also, these guys really have a woody for that Charlie Chan guy, don’t they?

DtM: Since when have the Mitchells had a cat?

S-M: Really? Really? Suspend a guy’s car in midair and leave him for the cops because he RAN A RED LIGHT?

Anonymous
June 26th, 2011 at 8:02 am [Reply]

@Ukulele Ike (#129): Re DT What really gets me is that hello, where were they when Locher’s insanity was dragging on for months?!!
Is it like “you can choose how long your stories are only after you’ve been working with us for some time”? Man, I always hoped that creative jobs were a bit more safe from this kind of management.

Comcis Fan
June 26th, 2011 at 8:12 am [Reply]

@Liam (#124):

Really? I am gullible, you know. Unless it’s back to pre-cancerous Lisa, I’m fairly sure I’m not interested.

Pseudo3D
June 26th, 2011 at 8:28 am [Reply]

@Alan’s Addiction (#15): Well, Cookie has doughy ears and a permastubble. That’s how you tell them apart.

Swordsmith
June 26th, 2011 at 8:41 am [Reply]

@Anonymous (#130): I’d like to assume that the idea is that by requiring short story arcs, if the product really really sucks you can pull the plug “soon” without interrupting the story. Locher, for example, spent at least two months in a recursive “I’ll kill you” loop… but the sad thing is, he could and should have been cut at any time one of his story arcs ended, which was what, at least twice a year for the past 30 years? (I refuse to look this up)

So the best we can hope for is that that’s still the idea, but it’s happened in response to the Locher fiasco.

wossname
June 26th, 2011 at 8:42 am [Reply]

@Anonymous (#130):

hello, where were they when Locher’s insanity was dragging on for months?!!

Excellent question!

As far as the syndicate/Curtis discussions, some Mudgeons who read the Gocomics forum (Bill Thompson and maybe others) have reported on this a couple of times, and I think it’s a little more complicated than “You have our permission to write longer arcs.” Seems like there was some timing issue? I don’t remember the details and I’m too lazy to go seek them out.

Rocky Stoneaxe
June 26th, 2011 at 8:48 am [Reply]

@Ukulele Ike (#129):

DtM: Since when have the Mitchells had a cat?

The cat’s been around long enough to become an official cast member:

http://www.dennisthemenace.com/hotdog.html

Braniff
June 26th, 2011 at 8:51 am [Reply]

FC: The Real Story: Daddy tells the melonheads “But we can’t buy the loaf of bread because we spent all of the money on the prostitutes and pole dancers at the carnival side show. Didn’t mommy tell you that you have ADHD?”

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 26th, 2011 at 8:53 am [Reply]

Frazz: lovely art in service of a sub-par punny punchline. But what lovely art!

9CL: Thorax Loquacious; Didn’t Read.

CdS: *snurk*

Doons: why learn what you can look up?

Dilbert: brilliant. just frikken brilliant.

FT: if they aren’t prepared, will the fans of the Zombie Strips do a shamble through their living room?

GF: it’s funny until someone gets hurt. Then it’s HILarious! (well, not really, but that’s what it was going for.)

HotC: o MY! nice tribute, and an obvious mash-up pairing with yesterday’s Lio.

IP: I made this same joke a few weeks back about Cap and a GL ring.

Lio: Dumbledorian WIN!!!!! *geekasm*

NAoQV: *boggles* o, this is WONDERFUL!!! *thunderous applaz*

PBS: *dies laughing* I love the crocs.

rMC: I’m down for hunting the spawn of the rich. who’s with me? (also, great 4th wall take.)

Bizarro: I LIKE IT!!! (Mr. Piraro, can we get this in a poster?)

MG&G: *giggles for no good reason*

SF: DO EEEEET! [*]

SFx: MT says to blame the raccoon.

PV: *does ‘horror show clutch’ with Poteet* O NOES!!

there was some darn good strips today. *happy*

Baka Gaijin
June 26th, 2011 at 9:25 am [Reply]

Archie: Jughead’s new jeans really lift and separate. Amirite?

Ukulele Ike
June 26th, 2011 at 9:29 am [Reply]

@wossname (#134): I peeked at the GoComics Forum. “The stories we have read so far from the new team were written some time ago due to the lead time required between production and publication.” I guess TMS was hedging its bets in case they wanted to fire the new crew at a month’s notice.

Mark B
June 26th, 2011 at 9:47 am [Reply]

This was the first story arc with the new DickT team where I wasn’t disappointed with the abruptness of it. I think part of it was that Doubleup was a minor character, with an annoying tic. If that went on for months, it would have worn really thin, WORN REALLY THIN! He was a dumb guy whose empire collapsed rather quickly. I guess his backstory might have been interesting, how did a not-so-smart fanboy with a mean streak and a speech impediment become a crime boss in the first place?

Another thing that helped is that it seems like the loose ends are actually being tied up, instead of just ignored. The little bit about the runaways in today’s strip was nicely done, and kind of poignant. I’m looking forward to longer arcs with more formidable villians.

Scott Bot
June 26th, 2011 at 9:49 am [Reply]

FW – I’m not familar with the song, but the last line makes me wonder, are they dancing to a Depends ad?

MW – I’d be dissatisfied with nursing if all my patients were dying off, too.

Pluggers – are fat lazy slobs. We know that already, and don’t need yet another strip to inform us of this.

RMMD – Let’s give a warm CC welcome to today’s guest star, Lex Luthor!

Mark B
June 26th, 2011 at 9:51 am [Reply]

Funky Winkerbean: Today’s strip is a waste, a simple recounting of the lyrics of a dumb country song … but on the plus side … no Les. Any FW without Les is above average.

Mark B
June 26th, 2011 at 9:56 am [Reply]

OMG, the artwork in the last panel of today’s MW! Liza’s face is melting, with her features sliding down and to the left. But judging by the intense look she’s casting at Mary’s cleavage, she’s considering some rather interesting career alternatives. And why did she turn yellow in the middle panel? Did her catheter get clogged?

Scott Bot
June 26th, 2011 at 10:05 am [Reply]

Tina’s Groove – As someone who wore the A&W Root Beer bear costume, I can very much relate to this.

Ukulele Ike
June 26th, 2011 at 10:05 am [Reply]

@Scott Bot (#141): Re: RMMD — Don’t forget the last-panel cameo from late beloved teevee comedian Foster Brooks! His hilarious “lovable drunk” stylings of the ’60s and ’70s were always in EPIC good taste!

Flummoxicated
June 26th, 2011 at 10:10 am [Reply]

MW: I wonder just how many real-life stalker situations are the result of job dissatisfaction. This storyline actually had potential, but Moy has decided that only Queen Mary is entitled to a stalker. Drew just gets a nurse too dumb to realize she could change careers, though he is apparently too dumb to know how to end a brief relationship.

MT: Again with the trash and garbage! Though the real solution offered in Sunday’s strip is KILL ALL RACOONS!

commodorejohn
June 26th, 2011 at 10:11 am [Reply]

A3G – “The sign says ‘Welcome to Ferndale.’ Is that my birthday surprise, Tommie? No? Ummm…oh, this road has a yellow line on it! Is that my birthday surprise, Tommie? No? Ummm…”

BB – Why do we even bother?

Crankshaft – Should I be surprised that Crankshaft’s dates consisted of listening to baseball while a girl sulkily stitches something while sitting as far on the other end of the swing as possible?

Curtis – It’s kind of odd to think that the days of rap being an underground, random-groups-meeting-in-an-alley thing are now as quaint and anachronistic as the days when the Beatles were this charming new group from that quirky island across the pond. Luckily, Curtis is there to remind us!

DT – *snrrrk* So this is, what, the retro-’80s Punky Brewster punk look?

FG – Wizard, wizard, who’s got the wizard?

JP – Yow. We see so little of Katherine that I keep forgetting how hot she is. (The weird part is, she seems to have taken over the “mammoth mammaries” role while Abbey is suddenly smaller and perkier. Do they just trade off when they get tired of ‘em?)

Luann – It’s child-manipulation lessons, with Jocasta deGroot! HOORAY.

MT – But what steps should be taken to facilitate chaining them to a log? An inquiring public wants to know!

MW – Liza, if you’re going to stare at Mary’s chest you could at least be subtle about it. Also you could have some furshlugginer taste.

PV – Still, at least witchcraft isn’t as entrenched in professional sports as steroid abuse.

RMMD – Rex isn’t trying to poison you, man! He’s just completely incompetent!

SF – …yeah, everybody else has already made the obvious comment here. Moving on…

SM – Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does one or two things an ordinary, un-powered policeman can…

John C Fremont
June 26th, 2011 at 10:22 am [Reply]

@Scott Bot (#141): I don’t think that’s Lex Luthor in today’s Rex Morgan. I’m not a big Jeff Dunham fan, but I’m pretty sure that’s his “Walter” puppet.

(It’s a good thing I previewed. I’d originally spelled Lex’s last name as Luther. I suddenly had a picture in my head of a bald-headed guy nailing a ransom note to a church door. Me go back to bed now.)

Mibbitmaker
June 26th, 2011 at 10:29 am [Reply]

MW: Mary: “I’m going to decide your entire life for you…”

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 26th, 2011 at 10:34 am [Reply]

I’ve seen ‘other’ versions of this story. (and do I ever wish I could unsee one or two of them!!!)(pic is squee.)

for when the Didactic Duo need camoflague. [*]

otterz in harmony.

I .gif Katy an xtra special hovercorgi.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
June 26th, 2011 at 10:36 am [Reply]

oops. forgot the ‘for bb,u’ one. here.

Rocky Stoneaxe
June 26th, 2011 at 10:44 am [Reply]

Mark Trail —

Wildlife managers are working to control the raccoon population.

How? The same way Dr. Jack Kevorkian “controlled” his patients?

Mibbitmaker
June 26th, 2011 at 10:44 am [Reply]

(oversnarpologies)

CdS: Tobias Funke had no comment.

[Old Man] Muffaroo
June 26th, 2011 at 10:55 am [Reply]

3G – Last panel: Margo’s having a ’strange interlude,’ holding up a mask with a facial expression on it. Isn’t that sort of spooky?

Baby – I’ll guess the shirt was fuzzed at the original source to spare us the sight of actual grawlix.

Snuffy – Ha ha! In Hootin’ Holler, “Jamey” is a boy’s name!

beetle – Nah. Too obvious.

[Old Man] Muffaroo
June 26th, 2011 at 10:56 am [Reply]

Crock – “You win, Bernie! You’re the smartest one here. Here’s your hand grenade and bus ticket.”

Family – “We lost PJ!”

Mark – “If you find a raccoon acting cute, call the authorities. Don’t try to chain it to a log by yourself. Only properly accredited wildlife writers can take in happy-go-lucky stray raccoons!”

Mary – “Liza, it’s clear that you’re tired of helping people. You’re still young and beautiful. Have you ever considered coming over to the Dark Side?”

[Old Man] Muffaroo
June 26th, 2011 at 10:58 am [Reply]

Orange – I take it that’s not a jar of tadpoles.

Slylock –
…Joe and Jesus are conversing about life, and Jesus points out how their two sets of footprints go side by side in the sands of time for all of Joe’s life. Joe complains that there are only one set of footprints in some of the difficult periods, like the time he lost his eye. (“A glass eye costs how much? Never mind, just gimme a patch.”) Jesus explains that the reason was because those were the times when Joe was too tired to walk, so Jesus carried him.

Joe persists: “How about this place here where there’s one set of footprints and a wavy line?” Jesus says, “that, my son, was where you were too heavy to carry, so I used a wheelbarrow.”

“And how about this place here, where there’s just a bunch of big dots in the sand?” Joe queries. “Pogo stick.” Jesus explains.

[from "Catharsis Joe" Man, I've got to scan that strip instead of quoting it every few months.]

Id – They had to change the last panel twice.

[Old Man] Muffaroo
June 26th, 2011 at 10:59 am [Reply]

@dale (#120): Maybe she was just singing nonsense syllables? All the damn way…
Gir: I’m going to sing the DOO song now! Doo doo doo doo doo…
[cut to commercial]
[card: SIX MONTHS LATER]
Gir: …doo doo doo… doo!
—from “Invader Zim” origin episode

@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#150): That’s basically the original version, there. Red shows up to find the wolf lying in bed disguised as Gran, who he has eaten. He tells her to take her clothes off and get in, and she does. “What big eyes you have,” she says. “The better to see you with.” “What big ears you have.” “The better to hear you with.” “What big teeth you have.” “The better to eat you with,” he says. And he does. The end.

Hibbleton
June 26th, 2011 at 11:05 am [Reply]

RMMD: Ha, ha, don’t be silly. No one’s trying to poison you. “Hey Liza, can you prepare Mr. Webster’s morning meds!”

Bill Thompson
June 26th, 2011 at 11:10 am [Reply]

@wossname (#134): I doubt we’ll know everything that’s going on with Dick Tracy. Mike Curtis has mentioned that TMS placed limits on what the creative team can do (at a guess, that includes “no blood, no gore.”) Length was one such limit.

The first two arcs (The Fifth, and Flakey Biscuits) originally appeared on the Plainclothes.com site, and are said to have been demos, to convince TMS that Curtis and Staton could handle the Tracy franchise. Those stories vanished shortly after C&S got the job. The Flakey Biscuits arc was cut short then, around the point that Hot Rize began to shoot it out with Sam and Dick.

My speculation is that those two arcs were recycled to give the new team time to prepare the following arcs. As they were not new, previously-unpublished material, TMS most likely paid less for them. That would give C&S an incentive to wrap up the FB arc as quickly as possible.

As for Locher and TMS, who knows? There have been news reports about unpleasant and unprofessional behavior at Tribune ever since Sam Zell took over in 2007. Tribune went into bankruptcy over their shennanigans. There’s a NY Times article which claims that the new management acted more like frat boys than publishers. It doesn’t look as though upper management paid any attention to what one comic strip artist did, and the lower levels appear to have been too demoralized to care. My personal suspicion is that Locher got away with a lot due to his politics; he still does editorial cartoons that I find distasteful, but fit in with the conservative nature of Tribune.

And that’s the way it is, Sunday, June twenty-sixth, 2011.

TheDiva
June 26th, 2011 at 11:10 am [Reply]

9CL: Is that what they have to pay to do it, what he’ll pay them to do it, or what they have to pay to NOT do it?

BRSG: These might as well be the code names for the extras in your average space opera…

C’shaft: Years ago, I toured the NBC Studios in New York and learned to my amusement that most radio announcers back in the old days didn’t cover baseball games live–they got the updates from telegrams and used sound effects to recreate the action, a sort of improv radio play. I wonder if Cranky is ignorant of this and doesn’t know his nostalgia is based on a pale imitation of reality, or he knows it and is just happier with the older, more awkward way of doing things.

FW: I don’t know what surprises me less: 1) that Funky is such a cheap-ass he treats his wife to after-hours Montoni’s leftovers on their anniversary or 2) that Tom Batiuk’s idea of a romantic song is one that features car crash imagery.

MW: Let’s see, what else could Liza do with her life? Um…thinking…oh, she could be a paparazza! That requires obsessively stalking someone, having no respect for personal boundaries, and a complete inability to take no for an answer, right? She’d be perfect! (Also, where exactly is the table here? Theoretically it’s between Mary and Liza, but I don’t see how it can fit into the space provided without breaking several laws of physics.)

Pluggers are lazy bastards.

SM: Wow, I didn’t think it was possible, but Spidey has hit a new superhero low…

Baka Gaijin
June 26th, 2011 at 11:39 am [Reply]

@TheDiva (#160): With those qualifications, the world is Liza’s shrimp scampi oyster. She could also be a car salesman, a burglar alarm salesman, a department store cosmetics salesman, or even an investigative reporter.

wossname
June 26th, 2011 at 11:49 am [Reply]

@Bill Thompson (#159): Interesting speculation re Locher and TMS. I knew about Sam Zell and have read with horror about what he’s done at Tribune as far as journalism – but hadn’t connected the dots to realize that was the same Tribune in the name of the comics syndicate.

Kinghasnoclothes
June 26th, 2011 at 11:55 am [Reply]

FW: The lyrics in the last panel clearly foreshadow a murder/suicide. Judging by the heavy-lidded anemic state they are both in, neither will have the ene
rgy to pull it off.

CanuckDownSouth
June 26th, 2011 at 12:01 pm [Reply]

@TheDiva (#160): re: Cranky: My dad remembers the old radio coverage of hockey, which sounds like what you describe for baseball. Everyone knew the announcers were getting the deal by teletype and it was HUGELY exciting when one network finally got the equipment to broadcast live from one of the arenas.

Rocky Stoneaxe
June 26th, 2011 at 12:05 pm [Reply]

@CanuckDownSouth (#111):

Sure Tommie, you just go on telling yourself that Luann’s family is odd to avoid having to face how your mom comes and visits for an hour every decade or so.

With good reason. You see, Tommie’s mother and family dwell in Zip-A-Toon*, a miraculously blessed village that rises out of the mists every hundred years for only a day.

*It’s right next door to Brigadoon, a similarly blessed village.

Écureuil Écumant
June 26th, 2011 at 12:45 pm [Reply]

@TheDiva (#160) on sports recreations: Yeah, I’m not sure the Hawaii Islanders (our triple-A PCL team) ever had live broadcasts of away games. The broadcasters’d get the line scores via phone as the game progressed, and recreate the games based on that thin gruel. The good ones had different effects for fouls, bunts, popups, grounders, line drives, homers. You’d hear the smack of the ball in the catcher’s mitt for fastballs. They’d play the little organ riffs, people hollering at the umps, every few innings you’d hear someone yell “Peeeeanuts! Popcorn! Crackerjack!”. A fan would yank off his cap and make a basket catch of a towering popup, or some kid’d get plunked by a lined foul and there’d be a burst of clapping as “he’s up and looks perfectly OK!” They’d describe batters getting hit and rushing the mound, donnybrooks between umps and managers. They were zen masters.

I even remember one where there was an hour rain delay, so the announcer trotted a horse out onto the field and it took an hour to “catch” him, everyone from the umpires to the players, to security guards, to fans, to cops and finally a cowboy rode in and lassoed him just as the downpour in Tacoma or wherever ended and play was ready to resume. We read the line score in the paper next day, it was a rain delay all the way. Fun stuff.

And yes, I listened to this at night by the warm glow of a bakelite Philco table radio with a full complement of tubes, in the 50s and 60s.

Écureuil Écumant
June 26th, 2011 at 12:53 pm [Reply]

DT, last panel: For some reason a phrase pops to mind –

“Grousing in the goodie”

Écureuil Écumant
June 26th, 2011 at 12:59 pm [Reply]

MT: I look forward to Elrod’s upcoming expose on Patagonian beavers. Seriously, the li’l leathertails are gnawing their way from Tierra del Fuego northwards and face no natural obstacles.

We need a snappy slogan for the upcoming fight; may I suggest “Feed a cold, starve a beaver!” [*]

Liam
June 26th, 2011 at 6:54 pm [Reply]

@Comcis Fan (#131):

Who knows? In a scene that plays sentimental music like that it wouldn’t surprise me Monday that we see Funky at his wife’s funeral.

Carter
June 27th, 2011 at 1:40 am [Reply]

I believe that Margo is making the universal sign for “loser” in panel 3 there.

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