Comics Blog: What they should have said in the soaps

Gil Thorp, 4/16/11

“Besides the heater? Are you talking about the pitch in panel one that violates the rules of space and time, passing right through the batter’s body without harming him? Becuase I think that’s pretty much enough, don’t you?”

Mary Worth, 4/16/11

“And what I want right now is cocaine, for my tiny, tiny spoon! Don’t happen to know where we can get some, do you, Doc?”

Apartment 3-G, 4/16/11

“This is amazing, Dan! You have a whole recording studio, right here, in your recording studio!”

This entry was posted on Sunday, April 17, 2011 at 04:33 pm and is filed under Apartment 3-G, Gil Thorp, Mary Worth. | 144 responses to “” Shrug
April 17th, 2011 at 4:37 pm [Reply]

Tommy is confused, because she thought the rule was “Sing for your *supper* (and hump like a crazed weasel for your breakfast).”

commodorejohn
April 17th, 2011 at 4:37 pm [Reply]

@Frank Lee Meidere (Y255), @Rana the Pedantic Wet Blanket (Y256): “Ain’t” and “y’all” are useful constructions, to be sure. Problem is, outside the southern US they’re still struggling with the “ignorant hill-folk” connotations they picked up at some point along the way. Once (and if) they get past that, I’m sure they’ll return to enrich the language.

I’m with Frank, though – I’d prefer “ye” for a second-person plural. Mostly because it sounds cooler to my ear, and is one un-broken syllable.

@bourbon babe, unbuckled (Y259), @Frank Lee Meidere (Y261): And I’m right there with you two on this. English is like the free-form jazz of languages – take a sentence, rephrase it, borrow from another source, cycle the word order any which way you please, and amazingly it can still be coherent and pleasing. The problem is that (like jazz) there’s an underlying structure that binds all the irregularities into a cohesive whole. It’s this structure that novices to the language don’t grasp – and unfortunately, it seems like there’s less and less emphasis on teaching it to them, at least to judge by their resulting output.

@Calico (Y265): It does seem that way – too bad this catalyst is encouraging detrimental changes. I sometimes wonder if the language won’t eventually split into multiple sub-languages, like classical and vulgar Latin. (Except that I’ve seen nothing to indicate that speakers of vulgar Latin were any kind of idiots, let alone idiots to the degree that YouTube commenters are.)

Shrug
April 17th, 2011 at 4:38 pm [Reply]

@Shrug (#1):

Er, Tommie, not Tommy. The stress of posting the first comment caused my fingers to malfunction.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 4:39 pm [Reply]

GT: Actually, Josh, if you look closely, the ball, after changing direction so that it comes from behind, then appears to go behind the left arm before emerging between the arms to pass in front of the right one.

I believe the pitcher is Lee Harvey Oswald.

ratnerstar
April 17th, 2011 at 4:40 pm [Reply]

‘Sup dawg, I heard you like recording studios so I put a studio in your studio so you can record while you record.

Sorry.

Karmyn
April 17th, 2011 at 4:43 pm [Reply]

Is there a hurricane going on in A3G? Because I can’t think of any other reason for Tommie’s hair to look like that.

bourbon babe, unbuckled
April 17th, 2011 at 4:43 pm [Reply]

@commodorejohn (#2): I use a text that is quite wonderful and terrible all at once—Joseph Williams’s Style: The Basics of Clarity and Grace—which helps students use the basic syntactical principles of English sentences to help them write, well, more clearly and gracefully; Williams also grounds his discussions in the effects of syntactical choices on readers, so the students see that grammatical conventions don’t function in a vacuum.

And we always come back to audience and purpose—occasionally as in, “If your Poli Sci professor tells you that you can’t use contractions in an essay, what should you do? Not use contractions! (But know in your heart that he’s wrong.)”

Karmyn
April 17th, 2011 at 4:44 pm [Reply]

Or maybe Tommie is the world’s first Peter Tork impersonator.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 4:44 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix:

Because of the thread jump, I’m reposting the link to the “Adventures of Avia: The little girl whose mother talks to spirit guides.” (And again, I apologise for the stock background, but I was busy.)

commodorejohn
April 17th, 2011 at 4:47 pm [Reply]

@bourbon babe, unbuckled (#7): Ah, nice. I’ll have to make a note of that one for when I have kids – they are damn well going to learn to write clearly and elegantly!

KarMann
April 17th, 2011 at 4:49 pm [Reply]

@wossname (#y235): Yeah, I used to be impressed by Frank Lee Meidere’s nom de blog, but then ennui set in, and now I just don’t give a damn.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 4:50 pm [Reply]

@bourbon babe, unbuckled (#7): I have a similar caveat to anything I teach: If another prof tells you to write a five paragraph essay, then for crying out loud write a five paragraph essay! And while “ain’t” may be grammatically correct (providing it’s only used in the first person), don’t go using it in an essay!

I don’t have an actual text. I’m supposed to, but it’s clunky, expensive, and it’s not a good reference book, so they’ll never use it again after this course. Instead I use a number of resources. For grammar I use The Jabberwocky. Discovering that grammar exists even in nonsense verse is often eye-opening to students who have been given lists of “nouns,” “verbs,” “adjectives” and so on to memorise.

Dilly Pickly
April 17th, 2011 at 4:50 pm [Reply]

It’s really eerie watching fully functioning adults develop a relationship without wrestling with the inner turmoil of losing the ability to love due to a dead parent or lost love or bad haircut in Mary Worth.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 4:50 pm [Reply]

@KarMann (#11): Ha!

Matt Algren
April 17th, 2011 at 4:55 pm [Reply]

“Unless you prefer to have breakfast first?” Did Dan Diller just invite Tommie to spend the night?

KarMann
April 17th, 2011 at 4:57 pm [Reply]

As for the matter of you, y’all, all y’all, ye, etc., personally, I’m a fan of bringing back “thou, thee, thy, thine” for singular, rather than adding something new for the plural. Also, the way I know of it (based on historical usage, admittedly), “ye” isn’t plural as opposed to singular; it’s nominative as opposed to accusative “you”. It would be strange to see that distinction twisted into a marker for number.

Rocky Stoneaxe
April 17th, 2011 at 5:00 pm [Reply]

@Shrug (#1):

Tommy is confused, because she thought the rule was “Sing for your *supper* (and hump like a crazed weasel for your breakfast).”

How much singing and humping does a boiled sheep’s head require?

http://www.mightysweet.com/mesohungry/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/07-Svi%C3%B0-Sheeps-Head-Zzagern0ns-plate.jpg

Doctor Handsome
April 17th, 2011 at 5:06 pm [Reply]

Meanwhile, in a different imaginary baseball game played by fictional teenagers we’ve never heard of and don’t care about, a bat is hitting a ball!!! The edge-of-your-seat excitement never stops with Gil Thorp.

Poteet
April 17th, 2011 at 5:07 pm [Reply]

@Artist formerly known as Ben (#Y43): Thank you! I was honored to ride on your hotdog cart.

R in CT
April 17th, 2011 at 5:09 pm [Reply]

Maybe it’s wishful thinking, but it looks like the third panel of Mary Worth that plant is about to go all Audrey on Liza — the start of a story line where Mary can finally pontificate about the evils of plants … “We used to burn them back in my day before they got the taste for human flesh, and clearly, we were right to do so!”

BigTed
April 17th, 2011 at 5:11 pm [Reply]

“I gained ownership of that apartment with nothing but my fierce determination, plus $20,000 down and $2,000-per-month mortgage. And an iron will!”

BigTed
April 17th, 2011 at 5:15 pm [Reply]

“Unless you prefer to have breakfast first? It’s no trouble — I just so happen to have an Egg McMuffin under my enormous beard.”

Fashion Police
April 17th, 2011 at 5:17 pm [Reply]

@commodorejohn (#2):
Except that I’ve seen nothing to indicate that speakers of vulgar Latin were any kind of idiots

to emphasize your point, we believe Signor Dante Alighieri wrote in vulgar Latin, or at least its direct descendant.

Poteet
April 17th, 2011 at 5:21 pm [Reply]

A3G — Okay, it’s definite for me now. Tommie looked better before. Now she looks the way Oliver Twist would have looked if Oliver had been a morose-looking redhead and his workhouse had intensely-ugly green uniforms.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
April 17th, 2011 at 5:25 pm [Reply]

@BigTed (#22): “with sausage”

Fashion Police
April 17th, 2011 at 5:26 pm [Reply]

@Karmyn (#8):
maybe Tommie is the world’s first Peter Tork impersonator.

Well! That was certainly worth a bemused smile. We can certainly see Mr. Tork in Miss Thompson’s pea-green swing coat.

We are, of course, along with everyone else wondering what Miss Thompson and Mr. Diller have been doing between the final curtain and breakfast-time, given that he is just now getting around to showing her his etchings recording studio.

Rhekarid
April 17th, 2011 at 5:27 pm [Reply]

I don’t know about everyone else, but personally I’m looking forward to this musical partnership between Alan Moore and one of the children from the Village of the Damned.

Rixter
April 17th, 2011 at 5:30 pm [Reply]

A3G:
Maybe it’s my imagination, or perhaps some innate prejudice, but it seems like Dan Diller is getting younger. Does he have some portrait hidden in that studio that ages while he grows younger?

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 5:35 pm [Reply]

@Rixter (#28): There’s definitely a Dorian Grey quality here, but because it’s a sound studio, it’s a recording of his voice that gets older and older while he gets younger. When the recording is little more than a toneless screech, Diller then runs it through a digitizer and sells the result to Katy Perry, who releases it as her next hit single.

S. Stout
April 17th, 2011 at 5:37 pm [Reply]

I thought girls played softball? That is not a softball.

seismic-2
April 17th, 2011 at 5:37 pm [Reply]

Looking at the sheet music on display in the recording studio in panel 2, it is clear that the randomly oriented notes were produced by someone who has no idea how to draw actual musical notation. As course, the artist also has no idea how to draw people, either, which is why he or she resorted to clip art from the action-filled Prince Valiant story arc “Sir Hobotramp and his page Tommy Worthnothing natter on about eating breakfast.”

Mr. O'Malley
April 17th, 2011 at 5:37 pm [Reply]

@commodorejohn (#2): I put in my vote for “youse” (“yous”? “yez”) as the plural second person.

@KarMann (#16): “Ye” is commonly used as second person plural in the south of Ireland. My little joke here is that “yez” has the same function in the north of Ireland.

chistery
April 17th, 2011 at 5:40 pm [Reply]

RMMD Today I realized I have to pay more attention when reading Rex Morgan. I usually give it just a quick glance to check for jutting and homoerotic subtext, the usual reasons for looking at RMMD. I completely missed the now obvious fact that Dex is supposed to be mildly retarded. Arrgh! Once again, tits and repressed sexuality have led me astray.

Doctor Handsome
April 17th, 2011 at 5:41 pm [Reply]

“This is amazing, Dan! You have what this strip’s artist apparently thinks a recording studio looks like here! I mean, it’s not even close, but wow!”

Calico
April 17th, 2011 at 5:41 pm [Reply]

@Frank Lee Meidere (#29):
Have a listen-this guy’s channel is great.
Civil War Veteran song recording-amazing
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KKiBTSOWVZA

Tagged
April 17th, 2011 at 5:45 pm [Reply]

Charterstoned
April 17th, 2011 at 5:49 pm [Reply]

MW – Dr. Drew spit his food into his napkin, didn’t he?

agony
April 17th, 2011 at 5:51 pm [Reply]

@Rixter (#28):

So it’s not just me, then. He looks like a very blond 20 year old. Could some ‘mudgeon who knows something about drawing explain how, with white hair and beard, and wrinkles around the eyes, there is absolutely no impression of age?

Stu
April 17th, 2011 at 5:52 pm [Reply]

@Karmyn (#8): ftw.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 5:52 pm [Reply]

@Calico (#35): That’s a classic. The voice of someone who fought in the Civil War being listened to in the 21st century by people sitting in front of their laptop computers. Sobering. I especially love the filming. The camera never leaves the record. It’s like a documentary proving that these sounds are really coming from this record.

Stu
April 17th, 2011 at 5:54 pm [Reply]

Not that I ever understand what goes on in Mary Worth, but people don’t “close” on apartments, do they? You usually “close” on something you buy.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 5:58 pm [Reply]

Baby Blues: Are we supposed to be impressed at the amazing abilities of children to detect the presence of broccoli in their brownies? Because I’m not. I am, however, impressed at the mother’s outstanding stupidity in believing that nobody would notice.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 6:01 pm [Reply]

@Stu (#41): Liza is a little confused. What actually happened was the guy closed the door in her face. The story should get interesting when she invites Dr. Doofus back to her apartment and they’re arrested for trespassing.

commodorejohn
April 17th, 2011 at 6:03 pm [Reply]

@Fashion Police (#26): The difference, of course, is that Tork, in or out of that coat, would have a certain quiet dignity (even when doing comedy.) Tommie, on the other hand, carries around an aura of quiet self-loathing and shame.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 6:08 pm [Reply]

The Pajama Diaries: Shut up! Shut up! Shut… . Wait. That’s funny. In fact, it’s clever.

All right, who are you and what have you done with Terri Libenson?

Erin
April 17th, 2011 at 6:11 pm [Reply]

I missed the first question mark in the third panel of Mary Worth. This, combined with Tommie’s askew gaze,led me to believe that Tommie lapsed into a Cro Magnon-like state while profferring her services to Dan’s beard.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 6:16 pm [Reply]

FW: Okay, seriously now. What’s up with Jessica? I thought at first her muppet look the other day was just a one-off bad drawing, but she looks the same in every appearance. I think that after her father was murdered she became a crack whore at a truck stop where she aged 20 or so years in appearance, and lost all her teeth due to drugs and rough clients.

I guess it was inevitable she’d end up in Westview.

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 6:19 pm [Reply]

@Frank Lee Meidere (#9): I am stunned and honoured. My first instinct on finishing the comic was to look for the “First” link so I could commence an archive binge. Can Charmaine be Katy, so we can go and visit her mother sometime?

Anonymous
April 17th, 2011 at 6:20 pm [Reply]

@stu (#41): I’m not familiar with real estate practices in Santa Royale, but it’s common to buy an apartment in New York.

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 6:22 pm [Reply]

@Matt Algren (#15): I initially assumed that she already had spent the night, and that now she was visiting parts of his abode that weren’t the bedroom, but on reflection I believe that theatre people characteristically stay up so late that the next logical meal might be breakfast, even when no sleeping or other bed-related activities have occurred.

Liam
April 17th, 2011 at 6:23 pm [Reply]

MW-”That was the third time that Liza has mentioned determined. I wonder what she wants. It better not be a piece of my pie because that is one fight she will lose,” Drew cluelessly ponders.

Mark B
April 17th, 2011 at 6:25 pm [Reply]

MW: Moy and Giella were so pleased with themselves for drawing an almost natural-looking hand, they kind of spaced out on the rest of the task and put a too-small spoon in it which is facing the opposite direction that anyone would hold it if they were actually planning on using it to eat.

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 6:26 pm [Reply]

@commodorejohn (Y272): What’s a “detrimental” change? Like the introduction of “its” as a neuter possessive in the 17th century? Or dropping the apostrophe from its original spelling “it’s” at the beginning of the 19th? Or perhaps you’re still bitter at the illiterate fools who let the original Old English degenerate so badly that grammatical noun gender was lost and the genitive case was reinterpreted as an abbreviated possessive pronoun, calling for an apostrophe.

Mark B
April 17th, 2011 at 6:27 pm [Reply]

One doesn’t buy an ‘apartment’. An individually owned living unit in a bulding which contains several dwellings is usually called a ‘condo’. One rents an apartment.

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 6:31 pm [Reply]

@Mark B (#54): If that were the least of the discrepancies between known human language and the dialogue in Mary Worth there would be much less call for this site.

agony
April 17th, 2011 at 6:33 pm [Reply]

@Frank Lee Meidere (#42):

I’m a cook at a daycare, and I make beet cake all the time. The kids love it, and none of them have ever noticed the beets. The difference, I suppose, is that I know how to cook.

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 6:37 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#55): Er least, greatest, you know what I mean. At least my hands are on the correct arms.

Walker of Dog
April 17th, 2011 at 6:41 pm [Reply]

FC: Jeffy the Ruiner ruins the final scene of Lost for everyone who liked it. And for everyone who hated it, they now hate it more.

JP: Sophie: “Going to the dentist will never be the same for me! Especially the rinse and spit part.”

MT: “Apparent glee”? Mark, what’s up with the anthropomorphizing? Do you have a litter of chipmunk pups you’re trying to upload as pets before Rusty eats them? Because that would be interesting.

MW: Change is the only constant in life? I guess someone’s never been to Westview.
– Intriguing: the patron in the last panel reading through his junk mail. “I’m pre-approved!”
– More intriguing: Liza pilfering silverware by stashing it in her Pouch. When the espresso arrives with its little demitasse spoon, she’s have a whole place setting.

bourbon babe, unbuckled
April 17th, 2011 at 6:42 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#53): I used to shake my little fists, futilely, at the roiling waves of grammatical change. And then I realized that if I became angry, outraged, insulted, or dismayed at every relaxed rule, new usage, or less-formal convention, while committing myself to a career that centered on the writing of eighteen year olds—well, I’d quickly wither into a bitter schoolmarm shouting grammar rules into the freshman void. So I mark their errors, and I cringe a bit at published gaffes, and sometimes I imagine Grammatica’s revenge—but mainly I content myself with encouraging the beauty of the language in my own little realm; I don’t get my knickers in a twist over the bad stuff, and I linger lovingly over the good.

commodorejohn
April 17th, 2011 at 6:45 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#53): I suppose you could look at it that way, but…if thinking that the English employed by YouTube commenters and the like is shoddy and degraded makes me an angry old codger, well, just call me Crankshaft.

This Guy
April 17th, 2011 at 6:46 pm [Reply]

@Fashion Police (#23): Dante wrote his Divine Comedy in Italian (Tuscan-style), which I seem to recall reading was something of a big deal at the time, Latin having been the standard for “serious works.”

Walker of Dog
April 17th, 2011 at 6:48 pm [Reply]

S-M: bats :[, I bet you’re going to get a lot of use out of that third panel.

FW: I know Les is the expert, but wouldn’t it be simpler to just stab Jessica in the heart with a sharpened crazy-straw and suck out all the tasty despair?

MT: “At Diet Smith’s storage site. Lizz better be inside all naked and oily.”

RMMD: Tony manipulated Dex with ease once he discovered that Berna makes him sleep on a futon.

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 6:49 pm [Reply]

@bourbon babe, unbuckled (#59): For me it took reading a couple of books on the history of English to completely accept that there is not and has never been anything approaching proper English. Now every ‘error’ I see I am ready to celebrate as my front row seat at the racecourse of language change.

Except for those people who can’t be bothered to use punctuation or capital letters. They obviously hate me and can die in a ditch.

[Old Man] Muffaroo
April 17th, 2011 at 6:51 pm [Reply]

@Karmyn (#8): Or maybe Tommie is the world’s first Peter Tork impersonator.
Interestingly, Tork was the first Barney Rubble impersonator, because he was the first living human to have two little hollow black circles for eyes. Rubble, in turn, was something of an Art Karney impersonator. What a tangled web we weave, when first we seek to entertain!

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 6:52 pm [Reply]

@This Guy (#61): That’s what she said. All the Romance languages are the result of the denizens of the former Roman Empire saying what sounded right to them, instead of what was in the textbooks.

seismic-2
April 17th, 2011 at 6:56 pm [Reply]

@bourbon babe, unbuckled (#59): I understand and sympathize. However, when I’m editing someone else’s technical report or journal paper and I see a gerund that’s modified by a pronoun in the objective case rather than the possessive, I still grit my teeth. Just because, you know.

terrapin
April 17th, 2011 at 6:59 pm [Reply]

@Frank Lee Meidere (#4): COTW nominee!

gleeb
April 17th, 2011 at 7:02 pm [Reply]

Zippy: I see there are still no takers on the idea of a big payoff Zippy movie.

This Guy
April 17th, 2011 at 7:08 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#63): At least the reason behind those errors is clear: laziness. There are also errors I see that are just baffling, like capitalizing the first letter of every word or separating each phrase or sentence with ellipses.

There are a lot of things I see and bristle at (dangling prepositions aren’t one of them), but overall bb,u is probably right. Die-hard prescriptivism, while a noble cause in my view, takes time and effort far out of proportion to its success rate.

There was once a good ol’ boy from Georgia who was admitted to Harvard. After arriving at the campus, he was supposed to go to the library for an orientation session, but he didn’t know how to find it. He stopped a passing group of upperclassmen and said “Hey, can y’all tell me where the library’s at?”
One of the upperclassmen looked down his nose at the freshman and said “Here at Harvard, we don’t end our sentences with prepositions.”
The freshman thought for a second and said “Okay… can you tell me where the library’s at, asshole?”

Krazy Kat
April 17th, 2011 at 7:11 pm [Reply]

Is anyone else disappointed that the A3G artist actually showed us the recording studio? I like to think of A3G as a pretentious stage play with minimalist sets a la Our Town, and the artist just up and ruined it for me by showing a bit of creative effort. Hey mac, just keep phoning it in! You’ll get your paycheck either way! (As you well know!)

terrapin
April 17th, 2011 at 7:16 pm [Reply]

FC: Would have been very charming if it hadn’t been spoken by one of the Devil’s brood.

SF: You know, I wouldn’t mind seeing Meadowlark Lemon in something right about now my own self.

Zits: Teenagers and their crazy music, am I right?

MW: Ok ok! You want the lobster, I get it! Sheeeesh!

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
April 17th, 2011 at 7:26 pm [Reply]

@This Guy (#69): I am only surprised that it took as long as it did for that joke to be trotted out. I figured it was a toss-up between that and Churchills “up with put” comment. :-)

Paul D
April 17th, 2011 at 7:30 pm [Reply]

I had never even heard of Gil Thorp, until Comics Curmudgeon came along. Gee thanks, Josh.

Zaratustra
April 17th, 2011 at 7:30 pm [Reply]

MW: “He was rambling about hospitals and parents and happiness but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.”

Old School Allie Cat
April 17th, 2011 at 7:39 pm [Reply]

@Paul D (#73): Yeah, I have this site to thank for Gil Thorp, Apartment 3G and 9 Chickweed Lane. And my life is so much richer for all of them.

Pseudo3D
April 17th, 2011 at 7:43 pm [Reply]

FC: I couldn’t help but think Jeffy is being mildly disrespectful, there.

Baby Blues: I couldn’t help but imagine marijuana brownies, here.

@Krazy Kat (#70): Like I said in my detailed A3G play theory, I believe that anything blue is a painted backdrop, like blue people.

Artist formerly known as Ben
April 17th, 2011 at 7:48 pm [Reply]

4/17

NS: So Wiley’s idea of Paradise is nude Calvinball with an anthropomorphic lion? I’m never watching The Wizard of Oz with him, that’s for sure.

FC: God help me, I laughed.

Blondie: “Hideous mongoose”? I guess losing that pet cobra really hit Blondie hard.

SSmith: “And I swar I’m tellin’ th’ roofies. I mean the truth!”

S-M: “I said, ‘Since I became a living vampire!’ Dammit, what does a vampire have to do to get a music sting around here?”

Hank
April 17th, 2011 at 7:50 pm [Reply]

@Frank Lee Meidere (#42): To be fair, there are actually a couple of books out there about chopping up vegetables really fine and trying to hide them in kids’ treats. I think Jerry Seinfeld’s wife wrote one of them.

Artist formerly known as Ben
April 17th, 2011 at 7:52 pm [Reply]

@Jim North (y212):
DT: Greatest Sunday Dick Tracy, or Awesomest Sunday Dick Tracy?

Yes.

Amanda Kate
April 17th, 2011 at 8:01 pm [Reply]

Well Josh, I don’t think finding any cocaine will be a problem considering Drew and Liza appear to be dining on a gigantic rock of crack.

Poteet
April 17th, 2011 at 8:03 pm [Reply]

I’m still trying to catch up on previous threads, and just found the news about Dingo. Dingo, I hereby join the chorus of CC well-wishers and sympathizers. We’re thinking of you!

wossname
April 17th, 2011 at 8:04 pm [Reply]

@This Guy (#69):

There are also errors I see that are just baffling, like capitalizing the first letter of every word or separating each phrase or sentence with ellipses.

I may be able to enlighten you on both of these, or at least I have theories for you.

While editing a motorcycle club newsletter, I realized that people who never learned to write very well — they may be smart, but they don’t know how to express it in print — use capital letters as a sign of respect. If Something is Important, or Praiseworthy, or Patriotic or Religious, you give it a capital letter to show deference.

The ellipsis dots: TV reporters/producers write their scripts in a way that makes them easier to read aloud smoothly, by indicating the phrasing and cadence with ellipses. When I first started seeing pool reports from TV reporters many years ago, it drove me nuts. Later on, I was writing scripts for people to read aloud and learned the value of it.

Artist formerly known as Ben
April 17th, 2011 at 8:12 pm [Reply]

9CL: For a brief and glorious moment, I thought that Thorax was chopping up Nazido Domingo for stealing his girl.

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
April 17th, 2011 at 8:13 pm [Reply]

@wossname (#82): they could also have learned from reading Winnie the Pooh books?

Rocky Stoneaxe
April 17th, 2011 at 8:15 pm [Reply]

@Artist formerly known as Ben (#77):

“Hideous mongoose”? I guess losing that pet cobra really hit Blondie hard.

At least it won’t be hard for her to find a replacement for the cobra she lost:

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/168/443019780_2dbdcb6506.jpg

Black Drazon
April 17th, 2011 at 8:18 pm [Reply]

“Let’s not ruin this wonderful meal with talk of housing and wants, Dr. Cory. Let’s just take up our spoons, dive into one another’s eyes and enjoy this wonderful meal of Roast Box together.”

YouWho
April 17th, 2011 at 8:22 pm [Reply]

GT: “It’s a nice contrast to our soft-tossers.” Um, are you still talking about Lini?

Anonymous
April 17th, 2011 at 8:25 pm [Reply]

@Mark B (#54) As I told Stu @#41 – it’s common practice in any large city (i.e. Manhattan) to buy an apartment. You guys need to get out of Santa Royale once in a while!

Spotts1701
April 17th, 2011 at 8:28 pm [Reply]

@YouWho (#87):
He struck me as more of a catcher, actually.

(Yes, you may now fling rotten fruits and vegetables.)

Anonymous
April 17th, 2011 at 8:33 pm [Reply]

Apt3G – Tommie doing her Bette Davis impression: “I’d love to sing for you, but I just washed my hair.”

mollificent
April 17th, 2011 at 8:42 pm [Reply]

@bourbon babe, unbuckled (#7): I kind of want to enroll at a certain university that shall remain nameless just so I can take your class. :)

mollificent
April 17th, 2011 at 8:45 pm [Reply]

P.S. and may I add yet again, after reading the first thirty comments or so, that this blog kicks ass?

Peanut Gallery
April 17th, 2011 at 8:47 pm [Reply]

@commodorejohn (#60):
just call me Crankshaft.

Hey, we’re all proud to be curmudgeons here, but let’s not go overboard!

Uncle Lumpy
April 17th, 2011 at 8:48 pm [Reply]

I worried when the Trib dropped Annie and Brenda Starr, but the new Dick Tracy put an end to that. Now I can’t wait for Pluggers: Unplugged, Gil Thorp: Euclid’s Triumph, the mass die-off in Gasoline Alley, and Jumble.xxx.

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 8:49 pm [Reply]

@seismic-2 (#66): You mean like “Him writing is non-standard”? I’ve never seen that or heard someone say that. You wincing is justified.

Peanut Gallery
April 17th, 2011 at 8:49 pm [Reply]

DT (penultimate panel) – Lizz is starting up her Aretha Franklin imitation.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 8:50 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#48): I think it might be better to introduce Katy a bit later. By bringing home a relatively normal girl at the beginning, it allows for more natural exposition, and provides the reader with an identifiable character: that character basically being the one who keeps going, “What the fuck?”

I’m also thinking of playing this so that while the “normal” characters are discovering how odd Avria’s world is, so is Avria herself. (Not, admittedly, a likely scenario for a girl of high school age, unless isolated community compounds were involved.)

As you can tell, I’m now starting to think of running with it a bit, and any stories you’ve got to tell would be welcome (although not all will work in comic form, of course).

In any event, here’s the second installment: “Getting to know you,” which follows directly after the first.

Hope you enjoy.

Anonnn
April 17th, 2011 at 8:50 pm [Reply]

@agony (#56): Hey Agony, can we get that recipe? Is it chocolate cake? My beet obsession pushed me out of my usual lurker status!

To keep things somewhat comic related, what the hell kind of “upscale” restaurant has a napkin dispenser on the table? Perhaps Charterstoned was right–the food is so bad that they need all of the napkins they can get? Liza sure knows how to pick ‘em…

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 8:53 pm [Reply]

@This Guy (#69):
Die-hard prescriptivism, while a noble cause in my view, takes time and effort far out of proportion to its success rate.

That’s hilarious, and a beautiful compromise between prescription and laissez-faire acceptance.

Rocky Stoneaxe
April 17th, 2011 at 8:53 pm [Reply]

@Rocky Stoneaxe (#y228):

Still More Weird Sound Effects (Sunday Edition):

Brevity — VRRRRR!
Heathcliff — BLANG
Liberty Meadows — PLOOSH!
Rabbits Against Magic — WHAP!
Dogs of C-Kennel — WOOSH… SWISH… SWIPE

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 8:56 pm [Reply]

@agony (#56): I can see it being done with beets, but do you think you could actually disguise broccoli in a brownie? I have my doubts, but if you ever succeed let me know.

mollificent
April 17th, 2011 at 8:57 pm [Reply]

MW: OK, any minute now Liza is going to launch into I’d Be Surprisingly Good For You” from Evita. I won’t quote the entire lyrics here (perish the thought!) but they’re eerily apropos:

“I don’t always rush in like this
Twenty seconds after saying hello
Telling strangers I’m too good to miss
If I’m wrong I hope you’ll tell me so
But you really should know
I’d be good for you
I’d be surprisingly good for you.”

Mark B
April 17th, 2011 at 9:07 pm [Reply]

@Anonymous (#88): Hmm, I lived in NYC back in the 80s and they were referred to as condos or as co-ops, depending on how the homeowners organization was going to take your money and tell you what you could and couldn’t do. I guess the terminology has changed.

seismic-2
April 17th, 2011 at 9:10 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#95): I mean if someone were to say to me “I worry about you reading ‘Crankshaft’ every day,” instead of “I worry about your reading ‘Crankshaft’ every day.” Of course, both sentences are correct, whatever the construction.

Rocky Stoneaxe
April 17th, 2011 at 9:11 pm [Reply]

@YouWho (#87):

GT: “It’s a nice contrast to our soft-tossers.” Um, are you still talking about Lini?

Where even Lini fears to tread:

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3107/2849255729_a3e1c93da9.jpg

Anonymous
April 17th, 2011 at 9:15 pm [Reply]

@Mark B (#103) I guess… but do a search on “apartments for sale NYC” and you will find a million or so listings that come up as such. Plus, a friend of mine just bought an apartment in Manhattan – had her name on the list in this building for nearly 25 years! And they were always referred to as apartments – go figure!

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 9:16 pm [Reply]

@wossname (#82): English being a Germanic language, capitalizing all nouns is not very far in our past. Perhaps, these students, asked to abide by grammatical rules laid down in the eighteenth century, are simply reverting to the capitalization vogue of the same time period. More likely it’s an indication that they never use capital letters in their personal communications, and it’s hypercorrection, the way someone who speaks an h-dropping dialect might pronounce the h in honour and hour while trying to posh-up her speech.

@Anonymous (#88): For many people, the distinction between a “condo” and an “apartment” is that the former is purchased and the latter leased from the building owner.

@Frank Lee Meidere (#97): This is thrillingly cathartic. As you point out people believe that their experiences are normal, and then when they find out they aren’t, seek confirmation that at least they aren’t unique. Seeing it in comic strip form is like finding out that it was the same for others. I think I already told you about the whales going to Jupiter, and her advice regarding bras, bicycles and frostbite. Most of what you could imagine about pilgrimages to Machu Pichu, swimming with dolphins, weaving her own clothes out of home-spun, home-dyed wool, and growing organic mung bean sprouts can be extrapolated.

Francisco Arrowroot
April 17th, 2011 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

Wait a minute, I see what’s going on here. The interminable story arcs that go nowhere, the wizened old man with the long white beard, Tommie’s new haircut. Apartment 3-G is merging with Prince Valiant, isn’t it?

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

@Frank Lee Meidere (#101): My roommate’s mother made amazing chocolate zucchini cake. I initially mistook the zucchini for nuts, and I think chopped broccoli stalks would appear the same way. Also, purée anything and it’s just filler. If they’ll eat ice cream with guar gum, they’ll eat broccoli brownies.

@seismic-2 (#104): Interesting. I’m usually pretty conservative when it comes to written forms, but they are both grit-free for me, and I slightly prefer the first.

@agony (#56): I second the request for beet cake recipes. I bet it makes a great-looking cake.

Anonymous
April 17th, 2011 at 9:24 pm [Reply]

@aviatrix (#107) – you may know aircraft.. but I know real estate… and I know the difference between a condo and an apartment.. thanks all the same.

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 9:30 pm [Reply]

@Anonymous (#110): Care to share your expertise? What is the difference to a real estate agent. And I rent a room in this home for six months, is it a condo or an apartment?

Maggie the Cat
April 17th, 2011 at 9:33 pm [Reply]

Regarding the apt/condo/buy/lease brouhaha, yes you can buy apartments. Knowledge courtesy of Sex and the City. And I always thought of condos as just a fancy way of saying “apartment with garage and your own front door on the street”. Don’t know if it’s actually true, but around here it seems to be.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 9:33 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#53):
I can see two detrimental major trends.

The first is that our standardised spelling conventions, which have made recognition of words so easy and natural that we hardly think about it any more (not always the case, historically speaking, in English), is being seriously threatened by a scattering of alternatives. If a nation invaded and imposed a new language (as has happened to English in the past), however intrusive the changes may be, they would at least follow a grammatical/cultural consistency.

The problem with many of our orthographic changes is that they are being introduced by hundreds of thousands (millions?) of youth whose primary purpose for doing so is to increase confusion. Some are merely more streamlined means of expressing a word, but a great many of the changes are made specifically to keep the meaning from adult eyes.

It’s not just adults they try to bamboozle, either. Using the word “newbie” rather than “n00bi3″ can be cause for ridicule in certain circles. Coming from such a volatile source, the changes introduced half a half-life of months.

The second detrimental change stems from the silo-like nature of the subcultures.

Here’s an example. When I took commercial art in the mid ’70s, we had a record player in the class for music, and everyone brought in a few albums. Throughout the day we listened to Barry Manilow, Jimmy Hendrix, Bad Finger, and even some Christian rock. The point is, while we were of vastly different musical subcultures, we were necessarily exposed to other subcultures, and to the mainstream.

This cross-over is far less common now. It is too easy to pick your subculture and virtually wall yourself off from everything else.

This kind of thing happened in England during the Norman rule. The villages became isolated, and as language changed (because language always changes, and all attempts to stop it are suicidal — as the French have discovered), there was little or no cross-over from one to the other. After a while the dialects became dissimilar enough that conversation between villagers 100 miles apart could be difficult.

It was to counter this problem, that the Brits, after they got their country back, chose the street language of London as their standard. Because of its importance to trade, it had been the one place where any cross-over had occurred during the centuries of French rule.

Today we have a similar problem happening, but the divisions aren’t geographical. Teens simply don’t have to interact with established cultural norms if they don’t want to. And what teen does? The effect upon language is a field of silos, each developing its own communication conventions (many created solely for confusion), and each unable to talk to the other.

The real fun begins when these silos start going out into the business world.

Frank Lee Meidere
April 17th, 2011 at 9:35 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#111): Oh, tell me that’s true! How cool is that?

queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando
April 17th, 2011 at 9:42 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#111): an apartment is rented. A condo is purchased, similar to a house would be. In theory, you can build equity in a condo, with an apartment, you’re just tossing money down the rent-hole.

nomuse
April 17th, 2011 at 9:56 pm [Reply]

A3G: And now we know why they won’t show the outside of houses. They would have done better not to show the inside of that “recording studio.” It looks more like a really cheap version of Ground Control, perhaps from some 50’s movie where the first rocket to the Moon discovers green-skinned babes and monsters in costumes rescued from the rubbish bins at the BBC.

Seriously…do they know anything about the recording business, other than “There’s a microphone, and a bunch of buttons?”

Anonymous
April 17th, 2011 at 9:59 pm [Reply]

@queek, source of Cuteness, but not accurate real estate facts (#115)
Wrong.
With a condo, you purchase the unit you live in plus an undivided interest in the common elements: land, recreation areas, parking, etc. However, you can also purchase an apartment, which generally means that you buy a share or shares of a holding corporation that owns the real property. As such, you may share a common mortgage with other owners. But you still OWN the apartment; you are NOT a renter.

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 10:00 pm [Reply]

@Frank Lee Meidere (#113): I have though about the ability we have now to isolate ourselves to socialize only with people who share our values, but I hadn’t thought it was so isolating as to create dialects. I was just considering a few threads ago the extent to which Americans were losing the ability to understand other English dialects because of television shows being remade or redubbed for them, but I thought they could understand one another.

I’ve always blamed the Great Vowel Shift on a teenage prank.

You wrote standardised just to tease me, right?

@Frank Lee Meidere (#114): I realized right after I posted that I had missed typing “if” as the second word in the second sentence, but it was too cool an idea not to let stand until someone called me on it.

Rocky Stoneaxe
April 17th, 2011 at 10:10 pm [Reply]

@Francisco Arrowroot (#108):

The “wizened old man with the long white beard” has been known by many names throughout history: Merlin, Dan Diller, Frank Bolle…

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_NpRums9accQ/SLkDqOpEEoI/AAAAAAAAA5I/gygpVfwEmeA/s400/laughingman.jpg

ElkMeadow
April 17th, 2011 at 10:11 pm [Reply]

@chistery (#33):

I’m wondering if this is a “first” for comicdom. Although RMMD has already had people with dementia hanging out at Cue’s crib.

GrafSpee
April 17th, 2011 at 10:13 pm [Reply]

I think that it is possible to hide broccoli as an ingredient in brownies. The key is to peel the stems and to chop up the broccoli very fine (a food processor would do a good job). I think that Wanda’s mistake was that she left large enough pieces so that it could be discovered. I suppose that the broccoli could be cooked first then pureed, but that would probably be costly in terms of nutritional value.

Johnny Knuckles
April 17th, 2011 at 10:14 pm [Reply]

@Karmyn (#8): A Peter Tork reference? The force is strong with this one.

Anonymous
April 17th, 2011 at 10:19 pm [Reply]

@aviatrix (#111)…. You ask, is this a condo or an apartment? Let me tell you, this is a nightmare! Who could sleep in that thing? I’d be waiting for a stiff breeze to knock it over, sending the whole thing into the pond, drowning me in my berth. Yikes; I hope you spend your other six months in secure quarters!

ElkMeadow
April 17th, 2011 at 10:20 pm [Reply]

Hi Dingo!

terrapin
April 17th, 2011 at 10:22 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#99): Sometimes I wonder if I’m smart enough to read this blog.

seismic-2
April 17th, 2011 at 10:23 pm [Reply]

Well, since this domicile belongs to Liza, I’d call it a neither an apartment nor a condo but a lair.

agony
April 17th, 2011 at 10:24 pm [Reply]

Here’s the cake recipe – it’s very easy and basic. It makes a dark chocolate cake, with an earthy undertone to the taste. I don’t bother making any other kind of chocolate cake anymore at work – no kids have ever noticed anything odd about this one. As for broccoli in brownies, why bother? Most children will eat raw broccoli just fine, if they have some dip, so why not just serve it to them? Easier and healthier.

Beetnik Cake

3 eggs
1 ½ cup sugar
¾ cup cooking oil
1 biggish can beets, or about 2 cups mashed cooked fresh beets
1 teaspoon vanilla

1 ¾ cup flour
½ cup cocoa
1 ½ teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon salt

Oven to 350 F. Beat eggs and sugar together in mixing bowl. Put beets in blender with most of the liquid, blend until smooth. Add to mixing bowl, along with oil and vanilla. Beat well.

Mix dry ingredients together well. Add to batter, stir to moisten. Put in greased 9 X 12 pan. Bake for 35 minutes or until it tests done. Cool on rack. Frost with chocolate icing.

Spotts1701
April 17th, 2011 at 10:37 pm [Reply]

@terrapin (#125): I view it like I view a ZAZ film – if I miss the joke, another will be along shortly.

Anonymous
April 17th, 2011 at 10:41 pm [Reply]

@seismic-2 (#126) – Swish… no net!!

Maggie the Cat
April 17th, 2011 at 10:42 pm [Reply]

@agony (#127):

How very cruel to sneak beets into an otherwise tasty treat. A crime of this proportion calls for a flogging.

agony
April 17th, 2011 at 10:45 pm [Reply]

@Maggie the Cat (#130): Hmmmm – what are you wearing?

Chance
April 17th, 2011 at 10:50 pm [Reply]

Of course you can buy an apartment. Any very, very wealthy person in New York or Paris knows that.

@38: As for why Dan Diller doesn’t look old besides the white hair and eye bags, as you have all noticed by now, those additions make for a young person with white hair and eye bags. Note the lack of forehead lines or lines around the mouth. Note the impression in panel one of a youthful, puffy cheek, and a young, rounded ear. In panel two we see the puffy cheek gone (no shock at the lack of consistency, I suppose), but DD has an equally youthful-looking high cheekbone. His head is high, his eyebrows black and thin. All artistic signs that this is a man around 20-30 wearing a Humorous Big Beard.

Okay, now here’s a few ways someone who actually known how to show the impression of age adds details. (The legal team would first like to remind you that all of the details artists add are shorthand signs and symbols, not meant to be taken as an inerrant commentary on the aged, who make up a very diverse group and occasionally look fabulous.) 1. Slightly hunched shoulders: age is not necessarily an indication of decrepitude, but the decades tend to add slouchiness. 2. Lines around the mouth: whether it’s a lifetime of frowning or laughing, these motions catch up with you and leave a mark. 3. Eyebrows don’t go grey as fast as hair but there could be some salt in that pepper… and either sparse, or bushier, that a young person’s. 4. This is another subject entirely, but hands show age much more than face some of the time: liver spots, wrinkles, etc. 5. Sorry, but ears get longer with age. Small rounded ears like DD’s convey the impression, again, that this is a young man wearing a funny Halloween beard. 6. Eyes are no longer as bright – one way to convey this is with heavier lids. 7. The youthful turned-up pug nose should be flatter and lower in the face: remember, gravity spares nothing that sticks out. 8. Clothes, but since this is Apt 3G this is a lost cause.

commodorejohn
April 17th, 2011 at 10:56 pm [Reply]

@Aviatrix (#107): I think I already told you about the whales going to Jupiter, and her advice regarding bras, bicycles and frostbite.
Okay, was all this in a previous thread and I missed it? This sounds fascinating.

Chance
April 17th, 2011 at 10:59 pm [Reply]

And forgot to say, @Doctor Handsome (#34): Ha! I’d nominate that for COTW, if I had any power.

Anonymous
April 17th, 2011 at 11:01 pm [Reply]

@chance (#132) … Ah, Chance… thank you so much for your endorsement that apartments can indeed be bought. However, with all your subsequent descriptions of the signs of old age… I would have thought your name would have been Shadow…

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 11:05 pm [Reply]

@commodorejohn (#133): Possibly. Or it’s one of those comments that I discarded as too far out.

Aviatrix
April 17th, 2011 at 11:06 pm [Reply]

Speaking of far out, look, new thread!

papa
April 18th, 2011 at 2:55 am [Reply]

@Charterstoned (#37): I thought Dr. Drew was using his handkerchief as a hand puppet to hold down his side of the conversation.

By the way, what’s that on the wall behind Dr. Drew and Liza? An off-center painting of Clark Gable dining alone, or a magic mirror that reflects a future aged and morose Dr. Drew, like Dave Bowman in the the white hotel suite at the end of 2001: A Space Odyssey?

Anonnn
April 18th, 2011 at 4:44 am [Reply]

@agony (#127):
Awesome, thanks Agony, can’t wait to try it!!

Kathyo
April 18th, 2011 at 10:10 am [Reply]

Apartment vs. Condo: Mary Worth is supposed to be set in California. Californians don’t close on apartments; they buy condos (which have several legal descriptions), or houses, or townhomes. It’s an entirely different real estate market from New York, where Karen Moy lives. The point is that she used inappropriate regional real estate jargon, which also slipped by her NYC editors.

Foolishness
April 18th, 2011 at 11:54 am [Reply]

Not only do I have a recording studio inside a recording studio, but I have beard underneath my beard.

Jeff
April 18th, 2011 at 1:11 pm [Reply]

I am a newbie to this blog, so forgive me if this is a topic of past discussion. But has anybody else noticed that all the characters in Mary Worth have essentially the same face? The artist can apparently only draw one face, which is altered slightly for different characters. And, despite being in the diverse state of California, everybody in the strip is Caucasian white!

greghousesgf
April 18th, 2011 at 4:54 pm [Reply]

did Blondie just threaten to divorce Dag over a knick knack?

Maria Veiga
April 18th, 2011 at 5:26 pm [Reply]

A3G That’s an amazingly continuously permanently boringly blue recording studio.

MW: In another dimenssion maybe that’s the way they hold spoons, as far as I know that’s a perfect match to Gil Thorp’s pitch.

Great comments everybody!!!!!

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