Mark Trail, 3/30/11
I’ll say this for Mark Trail: he makes no pretense of being acquainted with hip narcotics lingo, thus sparing him any rock vs. dope embarrassments. No, those squarish bales are just drugs of some kind, and that’s all he needs to know. Now he’s going to set it all on fire, which should be awesomely hilarious. Only Mark will avoid the contact high, by sheer force of rectitude.
Mary Worth, 3/30/11
“More to the point, how much longer are you going to be masturbating to my ‘men’s workout’ plausible-deniability porno mags? Damn it, I need those! They’re all I’ve got! You know Mary won’t let me use the Internet!”
Gil Thorp, 3/30/11
It’s come to our attention that nobody cares about the folksinger girl plot, and for some reason we feel obligated to do a musical plot, so here, here’s the exact same Slim Chance plot that happened last spring. Did you find that one tiresome after a few months? Well, too bad, it’s going to happen again.
This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 30, 2011 at 08:43 am and is filed under Gil Thorp, Mark Trail, Mary Worth. | 231 responses to “” nescioMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:49 am [Reply]
More evidence today that Marmaduke is a bloodthirsty demon.
nescioMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:52 am [Reply]
MW: With the aid of this magazine, 6 inches.
coloradoMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:52 am [Reply]
What’s up with the pics on the wall behind in panel 2 in Mary Worth today? They do look weird, right?
Écureuil ÉcumantMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:56 am [Reply]
MW: Between the pecs and the pics, OMG. Parallelogram picture frames are hot this year, I guess. And so is that package-pageant mag. Everyone’s catchin’ teh gay on the funny pages.
coloradoMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:59 am [Reply]
@Écureuil Écumant (#4): Thanks, I’m glad it wasn’t just me!
LorneMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:00 am [Reply]
The narrative in today’s Mark Trail is so clear and straight-forward that it’s disconcerting. Mark enters a room. He sees the drugs. He prepares to set the drugs on fire to create a distraction.
I was going to congratulate him for not needing narration, and then I realized that he’s actually narrating it himself, out loud, while he’s sneaking around the drug lair.
March 30th, 2011 at 9:01 am [Reply]
Why is that long-haired kid in Gil Thorp wearing a horizontally-striped caftan? Are the kids emulating Bea Arthur these days?
Comcis FanMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:02 am [Reply]
MW: Look, son! I get Men’s Workout right here on my electronic reading device! It’s like a crisp, new copy every time.
CanuckDownSouthMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:02 am [Reply]
MW: Good lord, that first panel’s art is bad. Mismatched head sizes, neither of which match the arm lengths. Did the artist get a “My First Silhouette Papercut” kit, try it out with gardening shears, and decide to show the result to the world?
Ripley’s… I know it can be boring to remember to write “millions” in, but isn’t that worth it to avoid dealing with readers who will now pester NASA about why we haven’t juiced up a Buick to go 200 miles an hour and sent a photographer out on a quarter-century round-trip to get some Proxima Centauri pics?
Scott BotMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:03 am [Reply]
JP – If she start singing ‘You Belong With Me,’ I’m gonna barf.
MT – Well, it may not get the guards away from the plane, but it should bring every other person on the island to the shed, which is kind of the opposite result. You probably would have been better of having MomJeans take her top off…
Pluggers – No, a complete idiot thinks you have to rewind a DVD. A Plugger thinks it’s cutesy and folksy enough to send to the newspaper.
Écureuil ÉcumantMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:04 am [Reply]
MT: OK, called a fire as the diversion, though I expected it’d be Mark’s rowboat rather than the stash house. The resultant inferno will drive all the rats out of the canebrake and … well, we know the rest.
Johnny LongtorsoMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:08 am [Reply]
Mark Trail: Drugs are bad. Arson is good.
Chyron HRMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:09 am [Reply]
9CL – “Being gay is like having size 13 feet! Except I never stuck my feet into a pair of gloves.”
Illustrator SteveMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:09 am [Reply]
MT: Looks like the local weather forcast for Smuggler’s Island indicates that a “high” will be moving across that area soon!
Écureuil ÉcumantMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:11 am [Reply]
@Comcis Fan (#8): Yeah, but whaddaya use to clean the screen? Windex? Bulb-Headed Billionaire in Barney & Clyde is gonna have issues with that.
DoodMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:11 am [Reply]
What are the odds of a good (not great, mind you) Gil Thorp storyline? Not even a slim longshot. There’s no-chance. At all.
McManxMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:14 am [Reply]
Phantom — “I’ve got him rattled…My only chance is that he might miss at this range” is jungle-speak for “I’m pretty well fucked… My only chance is that he’s forgotten to take the safety off before he trys to shoot.”
Mark Trail — I’m all for deus ex machina in story telling, but what sort of 21st century drug dealer still uses kerosene lamps in their storage facilities? I mean really now…
Mary Worth — Unless the writers are introducing a new subplot, I have to assume that they don’t realize just how gay this looks.
Slylock — I tried to work the cartoon word puzzle in today’s strip, but none of the answers came up “corpse” or “skeleton”. With all those bones strewn about the car, I was just sure that the bear ate the driver.
Scary Gary – Has anyone else discovered this comic? I guess I’ve always liked Addams Family style of monster humor, but this is pretty funny some days.
pugfugglyMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:17 am [Reply]
MT Having only the vaguest idea what ‘drugs’ are, Mark just assumes that everything on this island, even those ordinary bales of hay, are some kind of powerful narcotic. He’s actually quite lucky that he didn’t wander into the airplane fuel shed instead, and decide to light up all those big barrels of ‘avgas drugs’
MW: Is it just me, or does Wilbur’s silhouetted head look a little large? Maybe he’s had a few toasting-related accidents in the past, and decided to put on a helmet first this time, just in case.
A3G “Great, I guess”….I’m starting to think that the reason we haven’t gotten to the bottom of this ‘who is Dan Diller’ mystery is that he himself has forgotten who he is, or why he might be famous, or why he left Colorado in the first place…
DoodMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:21 am [Reply]
So, if the Coreys are into Men’s Workout, what does Wilbur read, Poboy?
S. StoutMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:25 am [Reply]
MT: “This match should help me light the fuel! This hallway should help me get away from the initial flames! This door should help me get out of the house! This grassy knoll looks like…”
MW: No, don’t cut away! At least end this Twitter-kite story with something interesting, like Mary sharing a silhouetted kiss with Wilbur.
GT: Slim’s pitching was so good last year that he’s required to wear a life jacket at all times to prevent any unfornutate drowning.
TheDivaMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:33 am [Reply]
MW: Gil Thorp set the “discuss homosexuality-related issues without ever actually mentioning homosexuality for fear of offending someone” pretty high–can Mary Worth top it? Stay tuned!
9CL: You’d think she would have noticed them before, what with Seth being a dancer and all. Of course, Seth didn’t notice her dancing until the Tango de Plot Device, so maybe they just wear blinders in the rehearsal hall.
C’shaft: Ewwww, she’s coming on to him!
FW: Most kids when they hear the word “braces” wouldn’t automatically think of a degenerative, debilitating illness. Of course, most kids don’t live in Funkytown.
reFOOB: I have to believe this joke was just as tired and overused in 1970-whatever as it is today.
Pluggers really are that stupid.
[Old Man] MuffarooMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:33 am [Reply]
Mary – Here’s somebody else who likes to get away from the computer on weekends, only in his case it’s to watch men work out. NTTAWWT!
Phantom – The Ghost who Acts on Impulse is starting to think that leaving a loaded pistol for his sworn enemy to find wasn’t a great idea. Plan B: More taunting. “Hey, I’ll bet you won’t shoot me!”
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:35 am [Reply]
rMC: Norm’s hierarchy of needs pyramid is a bit out of plumb.
A&J: Consumption of raw or undercooked food may increase the chance for food-borne illness.
IP: better than the actual strip!
R&R: ew.
9CL: unsubtle dick joke.
Luann: not even hidden unsubtle dick joke.
MG&G: ROFL!
GT: awww, Slim Chance and the All-Stars return!
standard snarpologies.
[Old Man] MuffarooMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:35 am [Reply]
Popeye – Christ, what a tree hole!
Prickly – Terrorist fist bump! MUSLIMS!!
coloradoMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:35 am [Reply]
@McManx (#17): Scary Gary is in the Denver Post, and it’s a really good comic
boojumMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:39 am [Reply]
MW: Huh. So… when two glasses of turd tea with lemon are clinked together, they make the sound “Moy + Giella.” You know what? That actually sounds about right.
CharterstonedMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:40 am [Reply]
MT – Ironically, Mark’s efforts to escape Smuggler’s Island by plane come to a crashing halt as he finds himself flying too high to take off from the ground.
MW – Where are the silhouettes of George Washington and Abraham Lincoln in that first panel?
[Old Man] MuffarooMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:42 am [Reply]
Snuffy – Cuts off I hate to ask, but… where do Hootin’ Holler men… wear… their wedding ring?
Spider – Sleepvamping. No wonder he looks so tired during the day.
Gloom RaiderMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:42 am [Reply]
MT: I’m waiting for Mark to get caught, at which, based on the way this is going, he’ll give his name as “Mark Gyver.”
MW: They’re resurrecting this Dawn-and-Drew plot?? Get back on MySpace, Dawn! It’s your only hope!
A3G: I don’t understand this one. There’s no way Dan Diller can be so old he’s unfamiliar with a colloquial usage of “freak” and yet still walk around unassisted, having some kind of influence over people’s opinions that is clearly way too cool to tell us about in detail…
Dr. P and the WomenMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:44 am [Reply]
MT: I’m getting a little worried about Mark, here. The two day growth of facial seems to be interfering with his moral compass; he’s found a giant room full of drugs and he’s going to smoke all of it. “To help him escape,” of course. If he spends much more time on this island without access to a razor the next time we see him he’ll be twirling his moustache, armpit deep in a pile of miscellaneous drugs and mom-jeaned women.
[Old Man] MuffarooMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:47 am [Reply]
@Chyron HR (#13): “Being gay is like having size 13 feet! Except I never stuck my feet into a pair of gloves.”
Gays, huh? Instead of having sex with their hands, they use their feet! (I know! WEIRD.) But listen, kids. Even if you can’t wear gloves during the act of love, you should still practice safe socks.
@TheDiva (#21): Most kids when they hear the word “braces” wouldn’t automatically think of a degenerative, debilitating illness.
If it had been Brooke, the default assumption would have been ’suspenders,’ and anybody who didn’t get it would be a beefwit.
March 30th, 2011 at 9:47 am [Reply]
@TheDiva (#21): “FW: Most kids when they hear the word “braces” wouldn’t automatically think of a degenerative, debilitating illness. Of course, most kids don’t live in Funkytown”
He might be translating “braces” as “suspenders”, and is surprised Cody doesn’t walk with a limp. After going around for years with a perpetual wedgie, most lads would.
@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#24): MW: Terrorist fist bump, yo! New Black Muslims!
Écureuil ÉcumantMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:52 am [Reply]
Oh well, at least I’m not a beefwit.
UncleJeffMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:52 am [Reply]
@Comcis Fan (#8): …and the screen cleans up nicely with just a spritz of Windex and a wipe!
nerowolfgalMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:53 am [Reply]
MT- So…….there are guards on the plane but non at all on the shed full of drugs?
Mind you I just realized that Mark Trail takes place in the same world as Superman where a pair of glasses is enough to camouflage you completely: Mark puts on a hat and is totally blended into a small community of drug smugglers, all of whom know each other.
boojumMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:54 am [Reply]
MT: Oh my god — the shed is full of “stuff?!?”
No, Mark, noooooo! They’re smuggling Snapple!!
Rocky StoneaxeMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:55 am [Reply]
@McManx (#17):
Scary Gary – Has anyone else discovered this comic? I guess I’ve always liked Addams Family style of monster humor, but this is pretty funny some days.
I’ve been a fan of Gary, Leopold, Travis, Owen, etc. ever since I discovered Buford’s strip about a year ago. Wish the Frankenstein Bros. appeared more often, though!
survivorMarch 30th, 2011 at 9:56 am [Reply]
I’m going to cut out the 2nd panel of Mark Trail and tape it to my refrigerator. It just can’t get much more awesome!
When viewed in isolation, it would appear that an unshaven Mark Trail has resorted to evil, arsonistic measures to deal with a rival drug lord …. while Mark is holding a bong.
Not Just Any DipstickMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:03 am [Reply]
MT: It seems that Mark ate the wrong mushroom before going thru that tiny door, but luckily shrank down by the next panel.
Rocky StoneaxeMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:05 am [Reply]
@Écureuil Écumant (#32):
Are you down with Funky Town?
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_q8835WCqFnk/S3-0QwhJBHI/AAAAAAAAAKk/JaiFmpYZp6Q/s400/FUNKY_TOWN_COVER.JPG
Not Just Any DipstickMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:05 am [Reply]
MT: Did I forget to mention that Mark will be using his missing bandage to make a fuse to light the fire with the matches he always has in a waterproof box in his pocket.
Chip WhittleMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:11 am [Reply]
Apartment 3-G: By answering the chance to meet Tommie with “great, I guess”, Dan Diller demonstrates the most enthusiasm anyone’s ever shown for meeting Tommie. And yet, he’s still too thrilled by the prospect.
Dustin’s Dad would be glad to help the Nigerian scammer, but all his capital this month is tied up in magic beans.
Funky Winkerbean: “You’d never know it. You don’t even limp. How long have you lived in this town, anyway?”
Edge City: Golly gee, I wonder if it’s at all remotely possible that Len is going to oversleep the first day of the Carpool Efficiency Plan. How funny would that be? Great, I guess.
Hi and Lois: They may be on vacation in a tropical paradise, but don’t worry, they’ve found a way to make the trip quietly joyless.
Judge Parker: Is…is Sophie ordering a hit? I gotta stop making eye contact before she turns on me.
Mandrake: “Johnny Root says he’ll testify against Red Dekker if he gets Super-Protection! And we have to keep him in the Treehouse of Fort Awesomeness until the trial! But it’s a good deal, we pinky-swore it!”
Mary Worth: “Son…how long will you be in Santa Royale? I don’t like prying into your life, it’s just…the neighbors are asking and…well, they’re right, I never had kids, so if you could kind of say…uh…who you are maybe?”
I like their following up a “my kid won’t talk to me anymore” story with a “my kid won’t leave me alone anymore” story.
Spider-Man: With the suggestion this recent battle was all a dream, Peter realizes now he can lose to supervillains and fail to get publishable photographs without even leaving his bed. He’d be doing the Gene Kelly “Singing In The Rain” dance all the way home if he had the energy for that.
Doctor HandsomeMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:11 am [Reply]
“Son, how long will you be in Santa Royale? Because, as you may have discerned from the paralyzed left side of my face, I’ve just suffered a massive stroke and could use some assistance.”
Rocky StoneaxeMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:15 am [Reply]
@Dood (#19):
Gabby Gob is the man of Wilbur’s dreams:
http://ny-image0.etsy.com/il_fullxfull.28908716.jpg
Scott BotMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:16 am [Reply]
Reading Dustin just gave me a great idea for Pluggers – ‘You’re a plugger if you’re waiting for that former high ranking Nigerian official to put 20 million dollars in your bank account.’
BootsyMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:16 am [Reply]
Hey! Constance Darling from Judge Parker is visiting Dennis the Menace today!
Maggie the CatMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:18 am [Reply]
Dan Diller is A3G’s Annie Apple.
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:19 am [Reply]
hedgiepuncture.
The break-up and the reason for it.
Cap’n Jack Sparrow/Davy Jones. (implied naughty, but otherwise SFW.)
a Jackelrod-lol.
move over, Snoopy.
otter sings the blues.
corgsqui.
BootsyMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:20 am [Reply]
@Dood (#16):
Dood, do not diss the poboy! If I play my cards right, I’ll be having a shrimp poboy and a cold beer tonight.
gleebMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:21 am [Reply]
Re: Gil Thorp, will there a sports-related Battle of the Bands? A romance between Folk-Girl and Slim (but with baseball involved)? I don’t think they’d throw her out there for no reason at all.
SpeckMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:22 am [Reply]
MT: Like Dick Tracy, I’m never sure when Mark Trail is supposed to take place. There’s all these “drugs” about, but that’s not very illuminating. And then he takes his oil lamp apart, and I start trying to remember the last time I saw an oil lamp outside the home of someone who goes “antiquing.” Maybe its some sort of retro-futurepast that I’m not clever/hip enough to pick up on.
Or maybe it’s just recycled art from talentless hacks. Either way.
[Old Man] MuffarooMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:23 am [Reply]
@Rocky Stoneaxe (#44): I thought it was going to turn out to be the Harvey comic. I don’t recall ever reading one of these. I saw it on the stand, and it was utter contempt at first sight. It probably didn’t like my looks either.
Rocky StoneaxeMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:30 am [Reply]
Gil Thorp — Chinbeard has a giant exclamation point on his chest… is he related to Frank Gorshin by any chance?
http://www.theminx.com/neal/riddler1.jpg
Doctor HandsomeMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:33 am [Reply]
Our entire island is dedicated to drug smuggling, but let’s not have a warehouse or anything. We’ll just stash our dope in a bunch of random unlocked tool sheds we ignore. That seems like a solid plan, right?
ApemanMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:33 am [Reply]
Mark Fail: Mark’s plan will succeed as long as he keeps talking to himself out loud. Villain 1: “That man’s going to burn our stash! Stop him!” Villain B: “No, way, dude! He’s got a bandage on his head, a 3-day beard and he’s talking to himself! I ain’t going anywhere near that hobo! He’s too creepy!”
CloudbusterMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:34 am [Reply]
9CL: You know, the size of a man’s feet are directly proportional to his ability to appreciate art.
MibbitmakerMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:34 am [Reply]
@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#52): I didn’t get that, either, but some time later, in 1969, my first comic book purchase was a Sad Sack Laugh Special. It was all Sad Sack, Spooky, Hot Stuff, Popeye, Flintstones, Archie, etc, for me — no superheroes.
How old is that Gabby book? I never saw a comic with Fred Rhodes’s signature (if you call that a signature!) in my day.
AustriaMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:34 am [Reply]
A3G: AUGH AUGH AUGH THAT FACE
BC: That took me a while. Not bad.
Curtis: It’s not the jokes that I’ve liked about these past two strips – it’s Curtis’ delighted glee over his grandfather trying to separate his parents. Though, in this strip, it looks like he could be gagging. Or maybe he’s reading Barney Google and Snuffy Smith right now, and trying to imitate the characters.
GF: I would like everyone to know that as soon as I was halfway through this monkey strip, a song came up on shuffle that was basically the monkey’s theme song from Mother 3.
Luann: “I mean, one person’s hottie is another person’s nottie.”
Brad? Never talk again.
MT: Omg, omg, omg, omg, omg. Mark Trail is going to burn things?! O great deities of the comics page, what have we done to deserve such delightfulness?!
MW: *snicker*
PBS: I heard that’s why his cameo in The Birds was in like, the first 30 seconds or something.
Zits: …The heck is the joke here? Is Jeremy supposed to always remember himself when he drives off? Is Mom supposed to remember Jeremy when she drives off? Is Jeremy her lunch? This strip concerns me.
Zork The MightyMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:35 am [Reply]
@Rocky Stoneaxe (#53): I honestly can’t see Ian jumping excitedly on a table. Now, Hugo Strange, on the other hand…
TophatMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:39 am [Reply]
Last year If you had asked me what was going to happen in Mark Trail today, I probably wouldn’t have said “A bearded Mark finds a room full of drugs and then debates on how to best smoke it.”
Frank Lee MeidereMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:40 am [Reply]
FW: So how did this conversation start? Did Cody just randomly blurt out, “I used to wear braces”? Where they walking down the street discussing their history quiz when suddenly Cody says, “Yeah, speaking of the Battle of Hastings, I used to wear braces.” I can’t conceive of any other way they could have got into a conversation about braces without it being perfectly clear which kind they were talking about.
Chip WhittleMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:41 am [Reply]
@Apeman (#55):
Mark Fail: Mark’s plan will succeed as long as he keeps talking to himself out loud. Villain 1: “That man’s going to burn our stash! Stop him!” Villain B: “No, way, dude! He’s got a bandage on his head, a 3-day beard and he’s talking to himself! I ain’t going anywhere near that hobo! He’s too creepy!”
Villain 1: “You’re right! Let’s get him a ticket to a Broadway show and set him up to meet Tommie!”
Villain B: “Great, I guess.”
Zork The MightyMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:41 am [Reply]
@Zork The Mighty (#59): …And, in my haste, I’ve confused Mary Worth with Gil Thorp. I suppose this means I don’t get to finish the Riddle of the Minotaur, does it?
MibbitmakerMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:42 am [Reply]
MW: Finally, Reefer Computer Madness is over! Now it’s– wait, what? Resurrecting the Dawn-and-Drew plot? You mean this could still be the same story adding more victims???
NONONONO!AAAUGHHNONONONO!!!!!!! (collapses into Crow-and-Servo-type sobbing)
March 30th, 2011 at 10:42 am [Reply]
“Son, how long will you be in Santa Royale?” asks Dr. Jeff tepidly, worried that Wilbur has convinced Mary that grown children staying at home forever is the new normal.
“Well, it’s not what I’ll wear when I walk down the red carpet with you,” said, “so the whole world can see me in my nasty, brutish, and short glory…and tremble.”
“But she defines what equal means… right?” asked Éomer, adding under his breath, “Just like fuckin’ Wormtongue…”
Rocky StoneaxeMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:44 am [Reply]
@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#52):
The Harvey version of Gabby Gob wouldn’t look good in assless chaps, but this guy would!
Incidentally, the Fred Rhoads who signed that GG cover is the same Fred Rhoads who worked on Harvey’s Sad Sack for a number of years — and ended up filing a lawsuit against his former company:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fred_Rhoads
Amanda KateMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:47 am [Reply]
Could it be this Mary Worth storyline is finally over? THANK GOD. It would actually be more entertaining if Mary and Jeff stared at a freshly painted wall for weeks on end, wondering if it’s dry yet. It just adds insult to injury that this came directly after the awesomeness that was Jill Black and her drunken rage.
MibbitmakerMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:48 am [Reply]
Okay, start over….
MW: Finally, Reefer Computer Madness is over! Now it’s…… Well, looks like this strip can’t afford guest stars anymore in this economy, it seems. Insular much?
ReFOOB: Rod John and the hygenist in a car together? Brave, Lynn!
GA: Time alone with Slim? That‘ll teach him! (either one, really)
H&J: Well, Sarah, it’s not like he’s Regis!
Thomas B.March 30th, 2011 at 10:49 am [Reply]
Mark is much more savvy than I thought. He already knows that he is immune from prosecution in America for trespass or assault, but he wisely withholds the serious crimes for his trips outside of “the States.”
—-
If Rusty looks strange now, just I wonder Mark will see once he’s tripping on the combination kerosene, a shed full of burned drugs, and the exhilaration of punching the lone guard watching the plane?
—-
Arson? No, I think Mark is just trying to make a wet-daddy.
March 30th, 2011 at 10:51 am [Reply]
#25 & #37 — Thanks. I’ve been enjoying looking at past strips of Gary through Comics.com. I liked today’s flame throwing phone ap. There are people in my office I would like to skeletonize…
Frank Lee MeidereMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:54 am [Reply]
@McManx (#70): This is what Mark Trail needs. Not that he’d have a cell phone.
Scott BotMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:54 am [Reply]
RMMD – Pretty soon, ‘equal’ for Dex is gonna mean fifty bucks and a one-way bus ticket to Cleveland.
Maggie the CatMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:56 am [Reply]
@boojum (#26):
MW: Huh. So… when two glasses of turd tea with lemon are clinked together, they make the sound “Moy + Giella.” You know what? That actually sounds about right.
Thank you for that chuckle, LOL! I deem this COTW-worthy.
MoggyMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:58 am [Reply]
A kerosene lamp? Mark Trail is using a kerosene lamp? And they say this strip doesn’t keep up with the times.
MibbitmakerMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:59 am [Reply]
JP: Just wait a couple strips ‘n’ he’ll be a younger man![/Groucho]
Luann: Ooh, so close to a bawdy joke!
MT: Look, it’s the
Anti-drug
Fire Bug!
NS: “Aaah, grrrrruesome, isn’t it?” — A snowman made to look like Jerry Colonna.
Rocky StoneaxeMarch 30th, 2011 at 10:59 am [Reply]
@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#52), @Rocky Stoneaxe (#66):
Hmmm… the Wikipedia entry no longer mentions Rhoads’ lawsuit against Harvey, so go here instead:
http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:J0xROz9nOQ0J:articles.latimes.com/2000/feb/26/news/mn-2836/2+%22Fred+Rhoads+sued+Harvey%22&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us&source=www.google.com
Red GreenbackMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:04 am [Reply]
Folksinger girl in Gil Thorp = The prime rib in FOOB.
MibbitmakerMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:06 am [Reply]
Popeye: Gee, you’d think they’d be shamed just by being called “goons” alone…
RMMD: Uh… It means……… equal? Boy, that poor Paul Sr. lookalike makes for a terrible socialist!
S-M: Omigod… he’s a… sleep-vampirer!
Zig: Without pants?! EEEEEEWWWWWW!!!
DT: So, entrust it to us already! –Oh, you mean to Tracy! Okay, then, carry on……
Effluvius ErratusMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:15 am [Reply]
@Mibbitmaker (#78):
S-M: Omigod… he’s a… sleep-vampirer!
Which means Morby only sucks when he sleeps…unlike Peter.
Chyron HRMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:15 am [Reply]
Luann – “One person’s hottie is another’s nottie,” said the malformed Chia Pet to the woman with a duck’s beak growing out of the side of her face.
tbiggsMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:16 am [Reply]
Cody’s senior year is a high priority. Not for grades or anything like that… just a last chance to play sports before taking that soul-crushing job at the mill.
Frank Lee MeidereMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:17 am [Reply]
Better or for Worse:
“In Lynn Lake, everyone but the miners walked to work – and ‘rush hour’ was a line up at the pub!”
Why did she waste this comment by posting it on her site rather than sending it to Brookins and possibly getting a Pluggers t-shirt?
Mark BMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:18 am [Reply]
MT: A kerosene hurricane lamp? Really? I remember those in my grandma’s house, but any structure that has been used since the 60’s would not have those lying around. There might be a flashlight or a battery powered lamp somewhere nearby if there’s no electricity, but keeping a fueled kerosene lamp around? Only if you’re really into antiques.
ShiaiMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:18 am [Reply]
FW: Ha ha it’s funny because Cody thinks it’s more likely he had polio or rickets than an overbite.
CRANKSHAFT: Wait…is the 19 year old coed macking on 85 year old Ed?!?
MW: Oboy, Dex is gonna be coerced into murdering Berna!
Rocky StoneaxeMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:18 am [Reply]
Judge Parker — The lead singer for Bad Acne is on the right:
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_wkMSc5DjQ18/SgzoOJXIqMI/AAAAAAAAI4I/v7uSDH2Ic2w/s320/gregory+%26+actor.jpg
Artist formerly known as BenMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:21 am [Reply]
MT: Mark Trail: The Movie! Written and produced by Cheech and Chong!
A3G: Dan Diller’s preemptive response to meeting Tommie is a huge “whatever.” Her reputation precedes her.
DT: “You see, Dick, I’ve made first contact with an extraterrestrial life form. Two of them are currently residing on my forehead.”
OBH: From what we know of James, I have no reason to believe he’d object to whizzing outside.
DtM: “Dad says there’s someone from the Uncanney Valley in here. Does she have an echo?”
S-M: The fiancee quietly wonders why Morbius can’t dream about sex every now and then.
Phantom: “My only chance is that he might miss from three feet away. Funny, this plan seemed better when I got up this morning.”
Luann: Yes Brad, it’s a package pageant. You know, friends don’t let friends double entendre stupid.
BB: Not the general’s favorite form of appeal, but I guess Miss Buxley wants to save the nip slips for special requests.
H&L: How long were the Flagstons planning this vacation before they found a whites only Caribbean island?
M-Dawg: The Andersons think American Idol is judged by a horrifying alien blowup doll, a random blonde newslady, and Wilbur Weston in a goatee. So at least they got the first one right.
Pseudo3DMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:21 am [Reply]
I have a question about Gil Thorp: do plots commonly end so abruptly? So, Parker did have the Lini hate site, but was too stupid to deny it properly, and now Jesus McGoggles will abuse him every day at practice?
Also, in Spider-Man: is it just me or does Spider-Man seem to blend into Morbius’s awful jacket he’s wearing?
Walker of DogMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:28 am [Reply]
@Rocky Stoneaxe (#53): That would explain the skewed perspective of the third panel (the handrail is at ear level, and the floor is doing that Parisian Inception thing). Today’s strip is an homage to the old Batman TV series, and Slim’s bandmate has a not-so-secret identity as The Exclaimer!
@Austria (#58): Drew may once have had an ok-looking face, back before it got all mooshed around. To give your eyes a rest, take a gander at the comely Dr. Morbius over at Spidey’s strip. Very soothing.
@Frank Lee Meidere (#61): Actually Cody hasn’t said anything. Owen just gets anxious during extended silences and starts babbling.
@Moggy (#74): Amen! No whale oil for Mark Trail! Cruelty-free illumination since 1874!
Effluvius ErratusMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:28 am [Reply]
@Artist formerly known as Ben (#86):
Phantom: “My only chance is that he might miss from three feet away. Funny, this plan seemed better when I got up this morning…
…and checked out that mysterious fire by Otto’s airstrip…
Esther BlodgettMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:29 am [Reply]
S-M: It’s really, really, REALLY bothering me that no one has mentioned the way Morbius’ hair has changed from lank and dirt-brown to lank and blue-black. But I went to the doctor for a refill on my meds this morning, so in 30 minutes or so I can go back to not giving a damn.
MT: It’s times like these I wish Mark Trail were a wacky comedy strip and not a straitlaced naturalist-adventurer strip. I’d love to see Mark wander out of the burning shed with his hair on fire and a huge, stoned smile on his face, waving to the smuggler-dudes as they run toward him with guns drawn.
Écureuil ÉcumantMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:30 am [Reply]
@Mark B (#83): It fits right in with that shed full of square groupers that have been sitting there since 1970 and were probably stale then.
DoodMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:35 am [Reply]
It helps as you read each panel of Mark Trail to imagine a laughtrack in the background.
MaryAnnTheRestMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:38 am [Reply]
@Doctor Handsome (#54): Look, there’s no point in locking the sheds because nobody can get on or off the island. And that explains why nobody questions how Mark got there. Since nobody can get on or off the island, he obviously must have been there all along. This also explains the kerosene lamp: electricians can’t get on the island either. Possibly the kerosene was stockpiled there by the Confederate Army in the latter years of the Civil War, or the Japanese Army in the latter years on WWII, depending on which coast we’re on. I fully expect Jimmy Hoffa to turn up on this island.
How they all got to the island in the first place is a mystery, but Otto’s plane seems to have the mysterious power to break the barrier. Also Mark’s rowboat. It can’t be a specific location where you can slip through the barrier or that would be guarded. Also there would be sentry towers, or at least a guy who could shimmy up a tree like Gilligan to look for boats. Another option is that blood must be shed to gain entry or exit from the island, and Mark was able to pass through the barrier because of his head wound. Yeah, let’s go with that one.
Jim NorthMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:38 am [Reply]
A3G: Just go ahead and grab that neckerchief, Dan. Grab it, pull it tight, and don’t leg go until he stops struggling. Don’t worry. No one will try to stop you.
Crank: “And I’ve heard a lot about you!” Then, after the pepper spray has finally started to wear off, Crankshaft will manage to wheeze, “Good or bad?”
DT: “I had to retire the space coupe due to terrorist threats from the planet Retcon IV!”
JP: So Sophie is over-competitive, an obsessive stalker, and a likely candidate for future serial killer. Talk about your triple cliche whammy!
FW: I like how Cody’s all “Were we having a conversation?” I would like it even more if Becky were walking behind them, winding back to give Owen the mother of all dope-smacks. I’d really prefer it if she were to clonk their heads together like coconuts, but y’know. Just the one arm.
Red GreenbackMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:39 am [Reply]
Luann: “Package Pageant”? How did Brad know the title of the article Drew’s reading in Men’s Workout?
ZaneTarloMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:42 am [Reply]
Today’s Luann reminds me of that one part in the Cellblock Tango from Chicago where the murderess who sings about having her husband run into her knife 10 times after he keeps accusing her of screwing the milkman. Well Toni might have to do that to Brad if he finds out she’s been screwing the delivery guy.
Cause she has!
March 30th, 2011 at 11:43 am [Reply]
@Walker of Dog (#88): Re: Owen. If he doesn’t keep up a steady stream of happy babble, that goatee of his will wish him into the cornfield. It’s got powers, I tell ya!
WLPMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:43 am [Reply]
This is why Mark is allowing himself to grow the face fuzz. When the time comes he’ll use it to filter out the noxious fumes from the burning drug cubes.
After all, if he didn’t have a good reason, wouldn’t he simply punch it off his face?
IconoclastMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:45 am [Reply]
Mark Trail is a true outdoorsman. Sure, he’s destroying enough evidence to put that entire drug syndicate behind bars for life. But that’s not going to stop him from making the Coolest. Campfire. Ever.
FireflyMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:46 am [Reply]
Dr. Jeff is so in tune with his kindle, he no longer has to look at it to read the novel downloaded on it!
IconoclastMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:48 am [Reply]
Actually, today’s Gil Thorp is just an intro to the real plot – a public service announcement about how massive drug use can destroy people’s memories. Derek’s band has no recollection of last year’s events.
pugfugglyMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:51 am [Reply]
@Mark B (#83):
MT: A kerosene hurricane lamp? Really? I remember those in my grandma’s house, but any structure that has been used since the 60’s would not have those lying around. There might be a flashlight or a battery powered lamp somewhere nearby if there’s no electricity, but keeping a fueled kerosene lamp around? Only if you’re really into antiques.
Hmmm…kerosene lamps, oddly mustachioed villains, bales of unrefined drugs…the evidence is mounting that Mark’s boat actually drifted into a quantum singularity and actually traveled back in time. On the plus side, he’s more in style than he’s ever been before!
mollificentMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:51 am [Reply]
Today’s Ziggy reminds me of one of my favorite They Might Be Giants lines: “If it wasn’t for disappointment, I wouldn’t have any appointments.”
Hey, I got to meet AhClem on Monday! We picked some tunes. It was awesome. :)
DanMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:54 am [Reply]
From the looks of those bales, Mark Trail’s drug dealers are getting high on Spider-Man’s webbing. I guess cable TV doesn’t pay for itself.
EvilSocksMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:55 am [Reply]
@CanuckDownSouth (#9): I’d say the first panel looks pretty bad, too. Reminds me of photoshops I’ve seen where people switch the faces of the two main characters in a Disney screenshot and try to tilt them so they look natural. The bodies don’t look attached to the faces…. Gah, I’m creeping myself out.
[Old Man] MuffarooMarch 30th, 2011 at 11:59 am [Reply]
@Mibbitmaker (#57): How old is that Gabby book?
1964. (The year, that is: not 1,964 years old.)
@Artist formerly known as Ben (#86): OBH: From what we know of James, I have no reason to believe he’d object to whizzing outside.
The family next door, when I was growing up, had six boys. Many of them went in the yard, and I don’t just mean #1. In fairness, I’d been in their bathroom a time or two and I could see the appeal of the great outdoors.
March 30th, 2011 at 12:03 pm [Reply]
I’ve posted this clip in the past, and am doing it again – this is for you, Mark Trail!
(Scene from Bon Cop, Bad Cop, after a grow house catches on fire-the awesome Colm Fiore and Patrick Huard are inadventently stoned out of their minds)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCAnxniC0kQ
March 30th, 2011 at 12:05 pm [Reply]
MW: Hurray – the new storyline will be about steroid abuse! Meddle him, Mary – you meddle him up real good!
RMMD: Rip Taylor, Attorney At Law.
9CL: Great. Seth’s giant boats have seen their shadow; six more weeks of foot-sex.
Plug: You’re a Plugger if you suddenly realize that DVDs run on witchcraft, then you burn yourself at the stake.
A3G: “Great, I guess”, Dan murmurs, as he quietly fishes around in his beard for his subway pass.
MT: Soon Mark will be too high from the burning drug fumes to punch himself for using drugs. Existential crisis.
Rana the Pedantic Wet BlanketMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:10 pm [Reply]
@Speck (#51): Now I’m wondering if Mark Trail is some variant of dieselpunk – you’ve got all of the old-timey technology and dress mixed up with modern things, so it would fit pretty well.
RoktoberMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:12 pm [Reply]
I look forward to the reveal that Mark just doused a stockpile of antibiotics meant for the third world.
“Whatever,” he’ll think as he stares at the raging fire. “Those are drugs and drugs are bad.”
Esther BlodgettMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:13 pm [Reply]
Pluggers: Wait, now. Last week Pluggers were totally down with the concept of a stylus traveling across the grooves of a 78 to play music, but can’t apply the same understanding to a laser traveling across a DVD to play digital images? Pluggers should stick to watching old Audie Murphy westerns on VHS tapes.
Thomas B.March 30th, 2011 at 12:43 pm [Reply]
Wishing to fulfill his lifelong dream before he meets his end, an aging Elmer Fudd allies himself with Mary Worth in hopes that meddling will succeed where gunpowder has for so long failed.
Rocky StoneaxeMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:50 pm [Reply]
@Red Greenback (#95):
Luann: “Package Pageant”? How did Brad know the title of the article Drew’s reading in Men’s Workout?
Especially since the pages in Drew’s copy are all stuck together!
@Esther Blodgett (#111):
Pluggers should stick to watching old Audie Murphy westerns on VHS Beta tapes.
Fixed it for you!
The GrandstanderMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:51 pm [Reply]
@boojum (#26):
“turd tea”…..I love it, especially in Mary Worth!
I agree with a poster from yesterday: I know that Moy & Giella are regular readers of this blog and write the strip solely to dick us off!!!!
Baka GaijinMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:52 pm [Reply]
Luann: Do-it-yourself funny (until Dingo comes along to assemble these pieces): Tony Toni, “Package Pageant,” and the Castro District in San Francisco.
Baka GaijinMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:52 pm [Reply]
@The Grandstander (#114): Seconded!
Effluvius ErratusMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:53 pm [Reply]
@Esther Blodgett (#111): Maybe the real problem is Pluggers trying to play the DVDs with the diamond-needle stylus and simply assume the reason Blockbuster won’t take back the gouged-out DVDs is because they’re not rewound.
MWDGMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:53 pm [Reply]
I thought Drew was back in Nam with his young adopted 18 year old dancer “son.”
Drew has finished medical school and is a practicing physician so he must be at least 28. He nailed that hot blond Vera and Karen Moy seems to be not so subtly suggesting that he enjoys sexual encounters with male fitness models. That being said why in God’s name would he have anything to do with Wilbur’s developmentally delayed daughter, Dawn? Frank Griffin seems more his type.
I honestly don’t know how Dawn and Wilbur can afford to live in Charterstone. Does Charterstone have some sort of budget floor?
If there is going to be a gay plotline why not have Terry Bryson have the lead…. Perhaps Terry could be a model for one of Dawn’s paintings?
FlummoxicatedMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:54 pm [Reply]
The new Mary Worth plotline: Mary meddles Jeff’s son into straightness!
Red GreenbackMarch 30th, 2011 at 12:57 pm [Reply]
Tune in tomorrow as Mark ambles over to the guarded airplane head-a-twitchin’ and asks the guard “WHAT DO YOU WANT?”
Ethan ShusterMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:00 pm [Reply]
“Nice priorities!” Yeah, you tell ‘im, whatever your name is!
LandbiscuitMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:04 pm [Reply]
I like how the drug dealers have two guys watching their plane but leave their warehouse full of—Well, of whatever drug that is—completely unguarded.
Fashion PoliceMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:11 pm [Reply]
We are having some difficulty coming to terms with young Dean in Heart of the City lounging around the lemonade martini bar in his shirtsleeves instead of a proper dinner jacket. That smacks a little too close to Master Bellini for comfort, and we had always appreciated that young Dean had the better fashion sense.
zenveloMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:11 pm [Reply]
I love Spiderman’s use of Morbius as an homage to Michael Jackson! Accurate down to the uniform pajamas and the face melting!
gnome de blogMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:15 pm [Reply]
I can’t believe Mark Trail would set fire to the storage shed. That’s exactly what Willie Garvin would do.
Scott BotMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:15 pm [Reply]
Pluggers – How did this Plugger get a DVD to begin with? They’re too cheap to buy them; and if they can’t figure out that you can’t rewind it, they sure as hell aren’t gonna be able to figure out the Redbox at the local Wal-Mart.
CorydonMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:23 pm [Reply]
MT: Everyone’s assuming that the traffickers are shipping pot. It’s obvious this is a meth lab though, which would explains the kerosene, if not the tasteful antique lamp. It would also explain Mark’s suddenly shabby personal hygiene and feeling of invulnerability. Well, perhaps not the last one…that’s just Mark.
Stay tuned for explosions, third degree burns and a hazmat crew arriving to pick through the wreckage.
bourbon babe, unbuckledMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:24 pm [Reply]
Just catching up with comics, but my hectic, stress-filled week will be completely redeemed if
-Mark Trail gets high as a kite (What will he do? Boldface appropriately? Punch someone and miss? Kiss a woman? The mind boggles.)
-Mary has to meddle Drew out of his masturbation addiction (“Jeff, have you tried flying kites with him?”)
March 30th, 2011 at 1:28 pm [Reply]
Between Friends: I’ll take “Myths about the Animal Kingdom You Should Stop Spreading Around” for $800, Alex.
Curtis: Why does what I assume is meant to be Curtis’s laughing face look more like a choking-to-death face?
Dennis the Menace: Oh wow. A “Mr. Mitchell says something that wasn’t supposed to leave the room and Dennis innocently repeats it, to the embarrassment of everyone” gag and a “Mr. Mitchell is a letch” gag in a single strip! I haven’t seen either one since the classic panels in my book collections. Could it be one of the writers has been thumbing through one lately? We can only hope.
Garfield: Stealing gags from Weird Al lyrics now, are we?
Mark Trail: |a|r|s|o|n| – My Anti-Drug.™ I’d say that should be the next CC gag t-shirt, if it weren’t a terrible thing to print on a t-shirt.
@Austria (#58):
Zits: …The heck is the joke here? Is Jeremy supposed to always remember himself when he drives off? Is Mom supposed to remember Jeremy when she drives off? Is Jeremy her lunch? This strip concerns me.
My candidate for QOTW.
DoodMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:32 pm [Reply]
So, Mark’s just gonna jump down, turn around and burn a bale of michoacan? Oh, lordy …
Mysterious Shirtless LawyerMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:36 pm [Reply]
Say what you like, Mark Trail rocks da dope! The revenge of stubble-faced Mark is going to be awesome!
Just Call Me EMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:38 pm [Reply]
@Speck (#51): “Or maybe it’s just recycled art from talentless hacks. Either way.”
Did you ever see the movie(s) Battle Beyond the Stars and Space Raiders? Your comment brought back memories…
terrapinMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:39 pm [Reply]
Phantom: Actually Ghost, there is one other chance. Put the tip of your thumb between your index and middle fingers, tell him you’ve got his nose and when he looks closer deck him one. But don’t forget to retract your thumb prior to contact or you’ll break it.
MT: Thought balloons, Elrod. Thought balloons.
DoodMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:41 pm [Reply]
From the looks of that window, Wilbur grows his own sammich greens from the convenience of his dining room.
LiamMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:41 pm [Reply]
MW-Wilbur with all the inuendo flying around about your love for Dawan your relationship is already damaged. That look on the person’s face in the second panel makes it look like he doesn’t read that magazine for the articles. He will be in Santa Royale until his operation is done.
QohelethMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:43 pm [Reply]
MT: “I’ll just start a gigantic, uncontrolled fire! What could possibly go wrong?”
Silhouette CrusaderMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:45 pm [Reply]
HAHAHAHAHAHA! First Beetle Bailey, then Mary Worth! Soon I shall have the ENTIRE COMICS PAGE SILHOUETTED!
Fashion PoliceMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:49 pm [Reply]
@bourbon babe, unbuckled (#128) observed:
-Mary has to meddle Drew out of his masturbation addiction (“Jeff, have you tried flying kites with him?”)
One sincerely hopes you are able to have your ball gown dry-cleaned by Friday. We have every confidence that the invitation to ride the float will be forthcoming.
Artist formerly known as BenMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:49 pm [Reply]
@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#106): Not just #1? I’m guessing you kept the curtains drawn at breakfast time.
JamesMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:50 pm [Reply]
Mary Worth – I don’t follow Mary Worth, but judging from that second panel it seems as though this man’s son has fled and left a plastic dummy in his place. His little brother thought it would be funny to put that magazine in its hands. The whole thing would have worked perfectly if the face hadn’t begun to slide off.
LiamMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:50 pm [Reply]
MT-The type of fire Mark is starting will get the guards away from the plane but will he be able to get to the plane.
[Old Man] MuffarooMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:50 pm [Reply]
@terrapin (#133): “That’s not my nose. It’s pink! Are you sure you’re not just playing with yourself now?”
Artist formerly known as BenMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:52 pm [Reply]
@Walker of Dog (#108):
MW: Hurray – the new storyline will be about steroid abuse! Meddle him, Mary – you meddle him up real good!
He’s only in it for the shriveled balls. You know, so he can be like dad.
[Old Man] MuffarooMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:53 pm [Reply]
@Artist formerly known as Ben (#139): Fortunately, it was not possible to see from the breakfast table without really trying to.
@Liam (#141): At least Mark abandoned his original plan of dressing up as a lady and luring the guards away, one by one. It would have been the first and only time he got into a woman’s pants in human memory.
Jim NorthMarch 30th, 2011 at 1:56 pm [Reply]
Hilarity ensues when Mark learns belatedly that the drug the smugglers are storing in that shed is gunpowder.
Chip WhittleMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:02 pm [Reply]
@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#144):
At least Mark abandoned his original plan of dressing up as a lady and luring the guards away, one by one. It would have been the first and only time he got into a woman’s pants in human memory.
You can’t look at Mark Trail and tell me you’re not wondering, “How would he look in pantyhose, high heels, a dress, elbow-length gloves and a dainty hat with a little flower poking out the top, flirting and whistling at boys like Bugs Bunny would do to mess with Elmer Fudd’s head?” You can tell me you’ve avoided looking at DeviantArt in case someone’s drawn that, though.
LUJBEM FEJFMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:05 pm [Reply]
@zenvelo (#124): That’s it! I was wondering where I’d seen that face before. Thnx.
odinthorMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:17 pm [Reply]
@Zork The Mighty (#63): Wait a minute… I thought Gil Thorp and Mary Worth were the same strip?!?!?!?!?
Scott BotMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:18 pm [Reply]
A3G – Mr. Diller? Is this the ‘Fang’ that Phyllis Diller keeps talking about?
PoteetMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:26 pm [Reply]
MT — I am very disappointed in the burning-shed distraction. I was looking forward to seeing Mark hide in a bush and tie a piece of string to a pancake and pull it along the ground.
PoteetMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:33 pm [Reply]
MW — In that last panel, the two sides of Jeff’s face seem to be arguing over which expression to assume. Oog, I feel queasy.
PoteetMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:38 pm [Reply]
@Chip Whittle (#146): Well, there goes the rest of my afternoon.
Mark BMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:42 pm [Reply]
Have you noticed that facial features in the Mary Worth art seem to be always positioned a bit off from where they would actually be if the person’s head were actually tilted at that angle? It’s like they have a limited gallery of facial features that they haphazardly sort of paste somewhere near where they ought to be. If the person’s head is looking to the right less than about 15 degrees, the straight ahead smiling face clip art is close enough.
littlestevieMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:48 pm [Reply]
@bourbon babe, unbuckled (#128): “Flying Kites” takes on a whole new meaning.
Gal FridayMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:50 pm [Reply]
MT: Next episode of “19th-Century Drug Smugglers”: Mark, having used the kerosene lamp to burn the drugs and create a distraction, makes his way to the “plane”–which is, in fact, a bicycle with 2 strap-on wings.
Effluvius ErratusMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:53 pm [Reply]
@Silhouette Crusader (#137): Like this?
tb4000March 30th, 2011 at 2:59 pm [Reply]
Luann: I see what you did there, Daytona. Bradley of course, did not.
The RidgerMarch 30th, 2011 at 2:59 pm [Reply]
@[Old Man] Muffaroo (yesterday #241): Actually I got the other word. My brother does it on paper so he didn’t realize it was the ‘wrong’ word.
terrapinMarch 30th, 2011 at 3:06 pm [Reply]
@[Old Man] Muffaroo (#142): What ever it takes. All he’s gotta do is get him to look.
CharterstonedMarch 30th, 2011 at 3:14 pm [Reply]
MW – Dr. Jeff’s nose is pointing in the opposite direction from his mouth. Is he actually supposed to be handsome in the MaryWorthiverse, or have we just slipped into the Twilight Zone episode, “Eye of the Beholder”?
Monty Python\'s Family CircusMarch 30th, 2011 at 3:19 pm [Reply]
FC:
I saw a thing that was not on top of another thing in any way.
MW:
Drew, you have to do those exercises on both sides of the body. Otherwise, your face will start turning sideways.
March 30th, 2011 at 3:23 pm [Reply]
@Steve the Pocket (#129):
A while back-a year or two? There was a TV ad for dementia/Alzheimer’s meds that showed someone leaving their keys in the frig.
Even if this is coincidental, I don’t find it very amusing…
March 30th, 2011 at 3:26 pm [Reply]
Oh what a long morning I’ve had, but at least my car is back in shape :) On to the comics!
A3G – No, Blaze. Tommie has never once displayed any emotion within three orders of magnitude of “freaked.”
Bizarro – Fun fact: this panel right here is 30,000 times healthier and less horrifying than any single Ghost Lisa panel.
Crankshaft – “This is my friend Kristen. She looks exactly like me except with brown hair and a high part. That makes her totally different and means Batiuk isn’t lazy at all.”
Curtis – …do you guys need a minute?
DTM – So, uh, why is Ms. Dish making eyes at Alice? I can think of an explanation, but I don’t think they even knew those existed when Dennis The Menace divorced itself from the progression of time.
DT – HOLY EYEBROWS, BATMAN!!! (P.S. is it too much to hope for that this is all leading into a story on space terrorists!?)
FW – What. No. Scrap this and start over.
GT – Derek, it’s an official rule: nobody has to take any crap from anyone wearing fucking Bubsy the Bobcat’s shirt.
JP – Uh, how do you figure that, exactly?
Luann – SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP
MT – Awfully nice of them to leave an oil lamp handy for quick incineration.
MW – So if he’s masturbating, but both hands are on the magazine…good Lord, he must have some talented thighs.
Red GreenbackMarch 30th, 2011 at 3:26 pm [Reply]
Badly Drew Boy
new_squid_in_townMarch 30th, 2011 at 3:33 pm [Reply]
A3-G: Isn’t it time for Iris to slip into a narcoleptic coma in the back of someone’s car? And what kind of name is Blaze, anyway? Are the hip, edgy off-off-off-off Broadway theater directors of today appropriating the names of 50s strippers?
MT: Pausing to remember the name for the literary conceit of starting each sentence with the same word, Mark remains in the shed long enough to inhale enough smouldering “stuff” to kill a hundred normal men. But it just makes him mad and ready to punch a “stuff”-dealer in the sideburns!
MW:Having crushed his daughter’s will, boastful Wilbur puts on his giant paper-mâché Wilbur head and celebrates by drinking his own bathwater with Mary. (Both are clad head to toe in black latex, but that’s irrelevant.) Meanwhile, a young man whose name and role I have forgotten, peruses a copy of Men’s Workout he has had reduced to 40% of its usual size to make his biceps look bigger. Dawn paints another broccoli still life and weeps. Somewhere a tuna casserole begins to bubble. Now read on….
Rocky StoneaxeMarch 30th, 2011 at 3:44 pm [Reply]
3-30 Weird Sound Effects:
Rubes — ZIP
Fred Basset — BEEP BEEP
Wizard of Id — FLAP FLAP FLAP
Rose is Rose — NOD NOD THWP THWP
Dogs of C-Kennel — MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH
March 30th, 2011 at 3:51 pm [Reply]
My theory is that Lonnie’s kid has followed Mark Trail to the storage shed and Mark is training her to be a junior crimebuster. Otherwise, there’s no reason to say out loud what’s in the shed and why you’re pouring kerosene on it and lighting a fire. And you’re never too young to learn how to play with fire. Fire is cool.
Fashion PoliceMarch 30th, 2011 at 3:58 pm [Reply]
@Chip Whittle (#146):
If Mark Trail donned women’s clothing it would consist of hiking boots, mom jeans and a pink shirt that buttoned the wrong way, which would flummox him so much that he would abandon the whole idea.
We are constrained to point out that Mr. Bunny wore stockings, never panty-hose. One imagines he employed figure-enhancing foundatoin garments as well.
Push TrotMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:01 pm [Reply]
SM: Just what New York City needs: A lethargic superbeing ambling witlessly through the night. And now he’s joined by a sleepwalking vampire.
Mel aka MelMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:06 pm [Reply]
For queek … pending MT and cuteness mashup:
http://www.ustream.tv/decoraheagles
Eaglets due to hatch sometime between now and Friday!
Dennis JimenezMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:08 pm [Reply]
MT Crimestoppers – If you find some white powder and a kerosene lamp, always light Miss Havisham on fire and run like hell.
MW – Two silouettes on the shade – The Rays.
GT – No clue – Steve Harwell, Jughead and Jeff Beck?
Adios Amigos
Little A and his Crystal Ball That Might Finally Be Right Predicts:March 30th, 2011 at 4:13 pm [Reply]
@Poteet (#150): HA HA HA!!! COTW for sure! If not the year so far.
I didn’t look in my crystal ball to figure this out, it hasn’t been working to well, for the past five years or so.
SamECircleMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:21 pm [Reply]
Duuuuuuuuuuude! Niiiiiice priorities, duuuuuuuude! Like, with irony, though! Yeeeeaaaaah! That’s that thing the kids are saying today, right? I mean, wrong? Ha! I mean, LOLO! Now that Gil Thorpe MyFace page will start raising the view tab count number!
DBurbaMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:28 pm [Reply]
Gil Thorpe tackles the Tim Lincecum origin story?
Little GuyMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:28 pm [Reply]
@Dennis Jimenez (#171): The Perfect Storm of “Mark Trail”, “Dick Tracy”, and “Great Expectations” made my day.
Écureuil ÉcumantMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:31 pm [Reply]
@McManx (#17) on who likes Scary Gary:
I’ll give a shout out to mr 12 oz can because he’s often commented on it.
Little GuyMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:32 pm [Reply]
@Effluvius Erratus (#79): Snark adjusted for “Calling It” — Ambien for Vampires. His fiancee has been giving it to him.
Hasty PenguinMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:40 pm [Reply]
I feel like Dan Diller’s remark in the final panel of today’s A3G could be used for the final panel of just about any A3G.
CloudyfridayMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:42 pm [Reply]
9CL- You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means.
Baka GaijinMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:51 pm [Reply]
Pluggers: Plugger Cat’s caption says something about DVD’S but his facial expression says he just discovered an intestinal blockage.
Zits: Now that’s just sadistic. Yesterday Jeremy was grounded for 2 weeks and now she’s tying his car keys to his head. Cruel. Good on ya, lady!
Baka GaijinMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:52 pm [Reply]
Henry: Ha ha, Henry’s pussy-whipped.
CanuckDownSouthMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:57 pm [Reply]
@Mark B (#153): Yeah, it’s been noted from time to time. I’ve seen comments about facial features sliding off, and I once opined that the artist is using a rub-on transfer set with facial features whose angles don’t quite match the predrawn face / hair shapes.
Joe BlevinsMarch 30th, 2011 at 4:59 pm [Reply]
Unlike his living counterpart, Zombie is capable of multitasking.
Walker of DogMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:02 pm [Reply]
@The Ridger (#158): Perhaps your brother, who does it on paper, would be interested in housebreaking [Old Man] Muffaroo’s feral neighbors.
ArchieNemesisMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:03 pm [Reply]
Love is … : Sorry sweetie, my bike ride is for me alone.
ArchieNemesisMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:04 pm [Reply]
@ArchieNemesis (#185): Also, why are we wearing clothes?
bats :[March 30th, 2011 at 5:11 pm [Reply]
@Rocky Stoneaxe (#37): the Frankenstein Bros.? Really? I thought they were giving Seth a run for his money (well, until this current 9CL storyline, at least).
I really, really like Scary Gary, too.
TheNateMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:24 pm [Reply]
Mark Trail:
This looks like the opening panel of a comic
This looks like the continuation of a boring storyline
This looks like a cliffhanger – or maybe it’s a conclusion.
Mix and match as you’d like
boojumMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:25 pm [Reply]
A3G: I’ve always felt bad for the Pantone® Process Blue People in this strip. But I figured their bizarre coloring was a natural pigmentation that uniquely fitted them to form shuffling background masses. Now I fear that the reality is far worse.
At some point in the past two weeks, Dan Diller’s snow-white shirt has suddenly taken on that tell-tale color. Clearly, he’s broken with Foreground Character tradition and embraced one of the crowd – in what fevered scene of furtive, illicit fraternization we will of course never know, since it would have been interesting to see. But in so doing, he’s exposed the truth: The Blue People have been enslaved, sprayed that soft turquoise-blue, and condemned to toil forever in silence, still wearing the late-1940’s clothing and hats they bore in their last days of freedom.
Their mute suffering touches my heart. Imagine: destined to live year after year, insipid plot line after insipid plot line, with only the voices of Margo, LuAnne, Tommie, and Interchangeable Male Units 1-3 ringing in your ears. All with no hope of ever gaining an Equity Card and getting that coveted job as Sidekick or Stooge in another comic strip. I did not think death had undone so many.
From now on, I will read A3G as a dystopian fantasy in which the Fronties live out their incomprehensible and empty lives, unaware of the surging tides of mingled despair and resentment all around them. One day, one day soon, those whose dreams they have crushed will rise up and claim their natural rights! GO BLUE!! Our hearts are with you!!!
Jamus The BartenderMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:28 pm [Reply]
Dick Tracy: “The real reason I retired the Space Coupe and air cars is this….having air cars and a space ship in a police detective comic strip is just plain fucking stupid, and everyone knows it…however, Grant Morrison just had Darkseid shoot Batman, who ( spoiler), before he came back from the dead, bounced around through time, and now he’s going to every country on the planet to make new Batmen. Plus, I think Bat-Mite is still hanging around. And, he uses that Whirly-Bat contraption. And Batman does very well in sales. Yes, the Space Coupe was stupid… but we need money !!
Sparkle PlentyMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:28 pm [Reply]
MT: Where do they buy kerosene on that little island?
Jamus The BartenderMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:32 pm [Reply]
Luann: Oh, hell, let’s call it what it is….an excuse for Greg Evans to draw high school girls in bikinis for a week. Plus, they have Miss Phelps in a swimsuit as some kind of…. object lesson or something, I don’t know…..
Jamus The BartenderMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:34 pm [Reply]
Slylock Fox: Buster Bear is BACK!!
commodorejohnMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:37 pm [Reply]
@boojum (#189): What I want to know is, how long before “random blue bystanders” is the only background Bolle remembers how to draw, and they start turning up inside the apartment?
Jamus The BartenderMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:38 pm [Reply]
MW: “…because you sit around all day, reading those men’s magazines….son, listen to me….and I want grandchildren. How in hell are you gonna get out and meet girls if you’re sittin’ around reading those men’s magazines? Also, another thing, I counted nine…no, ten bottles of some kind of men’s body oil in the can. How much body oil does a man need, anyway? Oh, Seth called, and he’s busy this weekend.”
Jamus The BartenderMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:41 pm [Reply]
Hi and Lois: Reelax. John Locke is off hunting some wild boar. And them’s good eatin’ !
Jamus The BartenderMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:43 pm [Reply]
DtM: You and me both, Dennis…..you and me both…..
Écureuil ÉcumantMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:45 pm [Reply]
@Dennis Jimenez (#171) said: “GT – No clue – Steve Harwell, Jughead and Jeff Beck”
I’ve heard Slim Chance. And I’ve heard Jeff Beck. And Slim Chance contains more fluid than Jeff Beck.
Jamus The BartenderMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:46 pm [Reply]
@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#23): Whoa, who’s doing reruns of My Cage? And where can Jamus find this tasty goodness?
bats :[March 30th, 2011 at 5:46 pm [Reply]
@mollificent (#103): that’s keen about you meeting up with AhClem! It’s not like you live in the same neighborhood!
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:51 pm [Reply]
@Jamus The Bartender (#199): GoComics, started this month from the beginning.
http://www.gocomics.com/mycage/2011/02/28/ is the re-start start.
Jamus The BartenderMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:52 pm [Reply]
@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#201): God Bless You :)
Red GreenbackMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:54 pm [Reply]
@Écureuil Écumant (#198): Hah! Slim Chance? Pouting for you?
Écureuil ÉcumantMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:54 pm [Reply]
@boojum (#189): Indeed, “GO BLUE” seems to be happening before our eyes. This conversation’s transpiring during intermission, and it looks like 90% of the theatergoers have bolted. I can’t believe they’re all still lined up in the lobby waiting for greasy hogsheads of popcorn. Nope, they’ve bailed. Nothing subtle about NY audiences.
Walker of DogMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:55 pm [Reply]
@Sparkle Plenty (#191): Kerosene smuggling! Just how far does this conspiracy reach?!
Pseudo3DMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:55 pm [Reply]
@Austria (#58): Re: Zits
I think it’s packing his keys with his head, because he’s an idiot sometimes.
commodorejohnMarch 30th, 2011 at 5:57 pm [Reply]
@queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii Commando (#201): Okay, it’s definitely time for me to update my goComics viewer scrip now. As long as I’m bothering, any suggestions?
LiamMarch 30th, 2011 at 6:03 pm [Reply]
Curtis-Is this the start of a new continous storyline about dead evil Grandpa Wilkins? Maybe there will be some storyline where Gunther brings something over from Flyspeck Island that raises the dead.
Écureuil ÉcumantMarch 30th, 2011 at 6:04 pm [Reply]
@Red Greenback (#203):
Well, doesn’t that puffy serape just ooze pooched-out succulence?
bats :[March 30th, 2011 at 6:07 pm [Reply]
Since it doesn’t look like Seth will be ungay (well, I guess he’s still gay)…maybe unfemaleburdened anytime soon…
(Damn, I hope Mark finds a really nice guy to fall in love with. Oh, wait, wasn’t that Seth? Cripes, this storyline stinks.)
commodorejohnMarch 30th, 2011 at 6:16 pm [Reply]
@bats :[ (#210): That (and Drew’s presence) reminds me – I wonder how Adrian and Scott are doing? Do you think they’ve figured out what goes where yet?
queek, source of Cuteness, Kawaii CommandoMarch 30th, 2011 at 6:16 pm [Reply]
@commodorejohn (#207): I rarely go there, ever since NAoQV & Lio showed up on Yahoo comics. When I do (aside from MyCage, which is a separate bookmark) I usually glance at Yenny and Love Is. . . . for the lulz.
wossnameMarch 30th, 2011 at 6:25 pm [Reply]
@Gloom Raider (#29): Oh, I think Dan Diller understands the colloquial use of “freak,” and in fact I think he may have been one of Ken Kesey’s merry pranksters. It’s the prospect of a freaked-out Tommie that’s making him have second thoughts about this whole trip.
@MaryAnnTheRest (#93): Serious COTW contender! And the best theory so far to explain The Mystery of Drug Smuggler Island.
@Calico (#107): OMD [o mon dieu] — I LOVE “Bon Cop Bad Cop”!!! Most of all, the scene where Bouchard is teaching Ward to curse in French, and finally gets him to say correctly “je m’en chalice!” Or wait, the scene where the bad guy is stalking the ur-Canadien mascot around the ur-Forum… Well, this all means nothing to anybody who hasn’t seen it and hasn’t lived in Québec – but I’m thrilled you mentioned it!
sporknporkMarch 30th, 2011 at 6:33 pm [Reply]
Mark Trail sets fire to a meth lab. Hilarity ensues.
littlestevieMarch 30th, 2011 at 6:54 pm [Reply]
GT: I am hoping that we will finally get to see, Backyard Yard Tire Fire play in Milford this year.
bats :[March 30th, 2011 at 7:08 pm [Reply]
@commodorejohn (#211): of course they haven’t! That’s a future story-arc and messy issue for Mary to meddle in!
PoteetMarch 30th, 2011 at 7:13 pm [Reply]
@Little A and his Crystal Ball That Might Finally Be Right Predicts: (#172): Thank you most kindly. Just knowing it gave you a good laugh is very gratifying.
commodorejohnMarch 30th, 2011 at 7:22 pm [Reply]
@bats :[ (#216): “I’ve heard it said, ‘a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush!’”
Blaise MarcouxMarch 30th, 2011 at 7:22 pm [Reply]
Mark Trail: “It’s not like burning up a whole bunch of drugs is going to put me on a hit list or anything….”
LiamMarch 30th, 2011 at 7:29 pm [Reply]
MT-Doesn’t Mark know that by setting drugs on fire he will be getting a contact high and by setting an entire shed of drugs on fire he will quite possibly overdose.
LiamMarch 30th, 2011 at 7:30 pm [Reply]
MW-By getting one person off of the Internet Mary Worth has succesfully brought down the entire Internet.
MibbitmakerMarch 30th, 2011 at 7:41 pm [Reply]
@commodorejohn (#194): Blue People wallpaper?
AviatrixMarch 30th, 2011 at 7:42 pm [Reply]
@MaryAnnTheRest (#93): You must have been a hoot on the Lost wiki.
@Poteet (#150): I have no idea what this means, but it makes me laugh my merkin off.
MibbitmakerMarch 30th, 2011 at 7:48 pm [Reply]
@bats :[ (#210): Yet it’s Garfield who has the most ludicrously huge cat feet of them all!
Sparkle PlentyMarch 30th, 2011 at 7:59 pm [Reply]
Stooooopid Mark. Out of the frying pan into the fire.
Pseudo3DMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:05 pm [Reply]
FC – That’s not a button, Jeffy, that’s your missing nostril.
Dustin – Isn’t this guy supposed to be a lawyer? How can he be so stupid?
Dewey's CoffeeMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:22 pm [Reply]
S-M: So, has Morbius just established that yes, it is possible for a villain to defeat Spider-Man in his sleep?
SequelManMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:25 pm [Reply]
@bats :[ (#187): The Frankenstein guys ARE a gay couple in Scary Gary. One is more old-style Frankenstein… his partner is more sophisticated… a metrohomofrankensexual. Great strip.
AviatrixMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:34 pm [Reply]
@SequelMan (#228): The recent comic of them both on the couch reading the newspaper in their pajamas is sooooo cute. I know couples exactly like that. Except, you know, without the neck bolts.
The RidgerMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:38 pm [Reply]
JP: Sophie needs to have a chat with Lini about the high school romances and how they long they last and how much they matter. Especially since she’s just a sophomore.
StriderGirlMarch 30th, 2011 at 8:39 pm [Reply]
@Austria (#58):
I think the joke in Zits is supposed to be a rehash of the tired “the mom always has to drive the teenager everywhere” thing. So if she attaches the car keys to the teenager, she’ll never lose them…
But I wish it DID mean that Jeremy was her lunch. It’d add a whole new dimension of almost-interesting.
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